Notes from The Last Drive-In: S2E6
It was an evening of chills, spills, and colonial ills for the sixth episode of The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs. What a night. We had two divisive features: Dead Heat and Cannibal Holocaust. I think we can all agree that maybe there was a little too much Piscopo. That and filmed animal deaths are pretty terrible.
So, lets dive in, shall we?
Dead Heat (1988)
Opening Rant: Can one loiter in a Starbucks?
We all know how this goes, two cops are investigating a conspiracy, one cop dies in the line for fire, and then is revived as a zombie to continue his work with his smart-aleck partner. Welcome to Dead Heat: It’s like Lethal Weapon meets My Boyfriend’s Back. The first movie tonight was kind of a light, airy aperitif to Cannibal Holocaust‘s main course. Dead Heat was goofy, overproduced, but still pretty fun.
The movie is an interesting product of late 1980s Hollywood trying to ape the spirit of the kind of trash coming from low-budget indie projects. The elements are all there but not handled appropriately. The film feels like a Troma release with too much money and lazy execution. There is stuff in this movie to love, though, and even a more scaled-down one or two films buried in this overly-plotted mess of the movie.
It’s strange that what should be a momentous occasion, the presence of Darren McGavin and Vincent Price in the same movie, does not really wow as it should. That’s kind of the movie as a whole: it should be way better than it is. Less time spent on Joe Piscopo one-liners and an amusing but ultimately pointless reanimated Chinese butcher shop inventory and Dead Heat could have been really good.
That being said, Treat Williams hurling himself off a motorcycle through a glass door, guns-blazing was certainly worth the watch. The film is fun, but that is about it.
Joe Bob’s assessment of Dead Heat is pretty middle of the road for a film on The Last Drive-In, coming in at two and a half stars. Of course, our host had a lot to say about the film and a lot of it was interesting, but it also felt like Joe Bob just wasn’t feeling it. This might be the most ambivalent he has ever been on a movie since his debut on Shudder. Perhaps it is a recognition of squandered potential in concept and execution?
Then again, Dead Heat was definitely not the draw for the evening. Cannibal Holocaust stole the show even before the episode aired.
Dead Heat could have been a better movie. I can only give it two and a half Cthulhus out of five. If the film hadn’t been as crazy as it ended up by the end I would have rated it lower.
(2.5 / 5)
Best Line: “God wants us to live forever. And even if he doesn’t, you could always buy him off.” – Loudermilk
Cannibal Holocaust
Opening Rant: Vegan Meat
The buzz around this week was already huge in the MutantFam as this was the rare time that Joe Bob revealed a movie early on. Cannibal Holocaust (1980) is a lightning rod of controversy and emotions in the horror community. I won’t say it is a “love it or hate it” film as my own feelings are fairly ambivalent, but it is most assuredly polarizing.
So, the thing about Cannibal Holocaust is, in my estimation, that any weight we attach to the film in the form of messages is in spite of director Ruggero Deodato’s efforts. The film is an exploitation piece, through and through, and it’s pretty good at that. It is a cannibal mondo and delivers some pretty gruesome stuff. Yet, the anti-colonial reading of the film is definitely more attributable to critics and viewers. Deodato has said a lot about the film since and has said the “right” things about intent, but the production of the film feels otherwise. I won’t relay the long, convoluted history of Cannibal Holocaust, but others have.
The film is largely ham-handed in messaging. Violence is swift, exploitative, and animal cruelty is a real issue. Joe Bob did verify that the animals slaughtered on camera were used to feed local indigenous actors, which doesn’t quite make it acceptable by any means but eases the sting of it a bit. Yet there are moments of brilliance.
The score is one of the haunting and iconic audio accompaniments to grotesque violence and exploitation shown on the screen. The score is downright beautiful and the juxtaposition of a romantic melody set against the slaughter of human beings works incredibly well in promoting unease in the whole on-screen enterprise.
This paragraph will have spoilers, so please skip it if you intend to watch the movie. I do not want to ruin two particular scenes. With that out of the way, it feels strange to say, but the best moment of the film could go to two scenes: In the first, the manipulative filmmakers burn down a hut full of trapped indigenous people and in the aftermath, the lead producer and his co-producer have sex near the smoking ruins in a scene of excess cruelty. So much interpretive work can be done based around this scene. It’s masterfully executed in establishing the Green Inferno-crew as the” real cannibals,” a sentiment delivered at the end of the film. The second scene is equally cruel: the three men of the camera crew rape and indigenous woman and the sole woman member of the crew protests, not about the rape, but the waste of film; after all, they can’t show this to the public.
These scenes of cruelty are intended as set up for why the events of the film play out, but they come off as so much more because of the cultural cachet of the film. Cannibal Holocaust is just one of those movies that carries a certain weight. Few people would straight up say itis their all-time favorite among certain company, though it certainly is an all-time favorite for some.
The problem is that, ultimately, Cannibal Holocaust just isn’t that good as a movie. It’s not exactly “fun,” though fun is not necessarily the be-all measure of quality. It’s not exactly deep, either, as it is a blunt metaphor that was sharpened by viewers after the fact. Most of the horror of the film stems from animal slaughter and barring a couple of moments, most of the gore is passable at best. The film’s most iconic shock is often displayed right on the cover of the DVD or on the theatrical poster. The film offers little besides novelty and is an interesting footnote in the debate of films and obscenity.
Yet, I firmly believe that any serious advocate for film should see this film. It is a strange contrast I must deal with; it’s not good, but it is also something to be seen.
Joe Bob’s assessment of the film, to me, seemed a bit mixed. There was a fair and justified amount of criticism regarding elements of the film, but what was interesting was the way he had handled the aspect of animal cruelty. Yes, animals were harmed in the making of the film and committed to celluloid, but those animals were also used as food. It’s an ugly bit of filmmaking but it is also something that has been overblown, to a degree.
The majority of the criticism revolved around the direction, and I definitely found myself in agreement in that regard. In my own estimation, Ruggero Deodato is an inconsistent center to such a touchstone in the horror community, and his on-set choices and antics are equally as problematic as the animal abuse. I cracked this joke during the live-tweet, but I think it summed up my feelings pretty succinctly.
Joe Bob has talked at length about the (hard “I”) Italian film industry of the 60s, 70s, and 80s. It was nuts. Imagine how crazy a person is to be considered too crazy for the Italian film industry.
The real highlight of the evening, however, was the sense of care for viewers that the crew of The Last Drive-In places into their show. The disclaimers were frequent, one at the end of the break between films, Shudder’s own disclaimer, the film’s disclaimer, the social media disclaimers in the lead up to the film, and Darcy’s own trigger-warning tweets as the film aired. It reflects well on Joe Bob Briggs and those with whom he has surrounded himself in this stage of his career.
Given the film, it is ironic that I can use the word heartwarming to describe the night as beyond the many warnings meant to protect those who may be unable to handle the content of the film there was something new. Something fans have wanted for a while: Host segments with timestamps, detached from the film. More are on the way for previous movies that have long slipped the grasp of Shudder, but rolling them out starting with Cannibal Holocaust is incredibly fitting. The ongoing BBQ gag throughout the host segments in the latter half of the night was incredibly cute as well.
Ultimately, Joe Bob’s score for Cannibal Holocaust is a reflection of polarization. It’s either four stars or one star. It just depends on how you approach it. As for me, the film scores three Cthulhus. It’s important but it’s not necessarily good.
(3 / 5)
Best Line: “Ah, yes, that’s typical Western thought. Civilized, isn’t it? That’s what Alan thought and that’s why he’s dead. The Yacumo Indian is a primitive, and he has to be respected as such. You know, did you ever think of the Yacumo point of view, that we might be the ones who are savages?” – Monroe
Haunted MTL Drive-In Totals
As always, Shudder shares those wonderful recaps. Cannibal Holocaust‘s are, as expected, pretty wild.
As for the Haunted MTL tally?
- 2 Bolos
- 2 Ineffectual Zombie Gimp Robbers
- 2 Dead Monkeys
- 3 Tribes
- 3 BBQ Styles
- 6 Yuki Sightings
- 700 Cop Cliches
- Trailer Opening
- Twin Peaks Connecting
- Darcy Jailing
- BBQing
- Lincoln/Kennedy Joking
- Nun Joking
- Woman Melting
- Tactical Vincent Price
- Mangled Dick Expert Felissa Rose
- Course-Correcting Gunfights
- Gratuitous One-Liners from Joe Piscopo
- Gratuitous Character Actors
- Disclaimer Fu
- Lipstick Fu
- Deli Fu
- Launching Off Motorcycle Fu
- Silver Bolo Award Winner: The Homicidal Homemaker
- Darcy Cosplay: The Turtle’s Revenge
Episode Score
While the energy felt a little lacking surrounding Dead Heat, the crew more than made up for it with the shenanigans surrounding the airing of Cannibal Holocaust. Had the discussion and host segments not delivered I very likely could have dipped below a four here.
(4 / 5)
As always, join us for live-tweets for the remainder of the season.
The finale of American Horror Story Delicate aired last night. And if you were watching along with us on Threads, then you already know that it didn’t live up to any of my expectations.
Let’s discuss.
The story
We begin with Anna being ushered off stage and into an ambulance. Dex is there because Siobhan called him.
Once in the ambulance, though, the blood starts to spill. And it’s not just Anna’s. She soon finds herself in the clutches of the coven, giving birth in the most anxiety-inducing place possible. And when the baby is born, he’s taken away at once.
Because that’s the agreement that Anna made, without fully realizing what she was agreeing to.
If Anna’s going to get her baby back, she’s going to have to make another sacrifice. She is going to have to join the coven herself. Is she strong enough to do it? Is she strong enough to raise a monster?
What worked
This episode did have some fun elements. As a practicing witch myself, I appreciate the addition of Hestia in a positive light. Especially when this season was so focused on motherhood, womanhood, and sisterhood, Hestia was a lovely goddess to include.
For those who don’t know, Hestia is a goddess of the home and hearth, but not a maternal goddess. She was, in fact, a virgin goddess. So Adeline’s devotion to her made sense in a real-world witchcraft way. Adeline was supposed to be a symbol of female love and support. Including Hestia in this made that crystal clear.
This was made most clear with the behavior of Siobhan. She was a perfect example of a toxic person who uses sisterhood to use and manipulate others. This can be seen clearly in the flashback that begins this episode. We see Siobhan show kindness to Anna, who she wants to use while being cruel to the woman who shared her story at the start of the meeting. For Siobhan, kindness is a currency she spends to get something. And that is clear.
What didn’t work
Sadly, those two elements weren’t enough to save this episode. My first concern is that this ending had more holes in it than Swiss cheese.
This wasn’t just a matter of having questions left after the ending. These were elements that we should have seen and just didn’t. Why were the witches diluting and working with blood near the end of the episode? Why didn’t Dex Senior get what was coming to him? What the hell was with those pointed green heels? My largest question, however, is this.
Did Anna imagine all of this? Did any of it happen? We don’t know. Consider the ending. I don’t want to spoil too much of this, so I’ll only point out Anna’s gown. It’s bloody in one scene and newly clean the next. This is only the example I can share without spoiling the ending. But we have no proof that any of these things happened to her.
While it’s fine to leave some questions up to the viewer, there were too many here. Rather than feeling mysterious, it just felt incomplete. And seeing as how this episode was much shorter than a standard one, this could have easily been corrected.
I would also like to hold some space for how this season ruined the good message of the book Delicate Condition. This novel was bloody, gory, and disturbing. But it also had a beautiful message about sisterhood, and women supporting women through motherhood, career choices, and life in general. There is so much pure, sisterly love in that book.
This is entirely missing from this season. It’s often turned on its head, with women betraying each other for their own selfish desires. And honestly, I hated that.
Finally, this season finale is another example of an ending ruining a good season. AHS Delicate wasn’t without its charm. Some episodes were great fun. There were elements that I truly enjoyed as a horror fan, a witch and a woman. But this ending just soured everything good about the season. It spoiled all of the enjoyment I had. Much like Sabrina, Dexter, and the podcast Dolores Roach, the ending ruined everything that came before it.
In the end, this finale was disappointing. It didn’t deliver on its promises, it did a disservice to the source material, and it was poorly executed. This series is more than capable of better. Delicate Condition, the novel, deserved a better interpretation.
However, as a long-time fan, I can honestly say that in twelve years of content, I have genuinely disliked a season and a half of American Horror Story. This one, and the second half of Double Feature. So while AHS Delicate was a disappointment, I am looking forward to season thirteen. In the meantime, I’m going to rewatch Coven and look forward to better stories to come.
(2 / 5)
Episode three of Amazon Prime’s Fallout continued the themes we’ve seen so far, with an added twist. With comedy and gore already blending, the story has added an air of tragic history for one of its least cuddly characters.
Let’s discuss.
The story
Our story starts with a flashback to before the bombs dropped. We see Coop, filming a movie. His wife is on set as well, and their adorable daughter. Coop has a comfortable life with a family he loves.
Isn’t that just a knife in the heart?
Back in the present, Lucy is traveling through the wastelands with the head of Wilzig. And she’s doing so with the same fear and joy that we’ve seen from her so far. Until that is, she runs into a Gulper. And after eating a defenseless deer, it swallowed up the head.
Eventually, The Ghoul catches up with Lucy and decides to capture her. After using her as bait, he decides to drag her along with him.
Meanwhile, Maximus gets a message from the Brotherhood of Steel. Rather than coming clean, he claims to be Knight Titus and is accidentally sent a new Squire. That squire is Thaddeus, one of Maximus’s bullies from the base. And Maximus wastes no time in taking some sweet, sweet revenge.
Finally, we return to Vault 33. The vault is healing from the Raider attack and the loss of Lucy. Norm and Chet are being punished for letting Lucy leave, by being fired from their jobs. This throws Chet because he had a cool job.
Norm, on the other hand, didn’t like his job. He didn’t like any job. So, since this is the only way anyone gets punishments in the vault, he’s given the task of feeding the Raiders.
And talking to the Raiders was maybe not a healthy thing for Norm to be doing. He might learn something he didn’t want to know.
What worked
The first thing I have to talk about is the massive creature called The Gulper.
This thing was fascinating. It was voracious, fast, and horrifying to look like. It was like a giant axolotl from Hell, with human fingers lining its whole mouth and throat. Why did it need fingers lining its mouth and throat? The better to drag someone down its throat and into its stomach. And the better to drag itself into my nightmares. This creature was well done.
On the flip side of this, I love the fact that the people of Vault 33 are so kind. They’re so willing to forgive, willing to care for their fellow man even when their fellow man is trying to kill them.
I don’t trust it, to be clear. But the perceived kindness from these people is uplifting. And I’m sure it will make whatever is going to eventually happen to them all the worse.
Of course, I can’t talk about the goodness of the vault dwellers without talking about the absolute horribleness of The Ghoul. The Ghoul is not a good person. He is cruel, and selfish, and clearly dislikes Lucy for some reason we do not yet know, and is probably not her fault.
But we kind of understand how he got that way, don’t we? During the flashbacks, we see that he’s lost his wife and daughter. We also see that he was used as a mascot for the very company that created the vaults. And, while we don’t have any concrete proof yet, we can probably guess that these are not the good guys. Even if we haven’t played the games, anyone who’s even slightly genre-savvy can already guess that.
Which is the last thing I want to bring up here.
We know something stinks with the vaults. Something beyond the obvious issues of wealth disparities and the people left outside to die while those who could afford a Vault spot were saved. Something is rotten with the vaults, we all know this. What we don’t know is what form this rot will take.
Not yet.
What didn’t work
Now, I wish I could say this was a perfect episode. But sadly, it wasn’t. And my biggest issue with the episode is with the character Maximus.
Now, I love Maximus. He wants to do good things in the world. He’s the underdog, and who doesn’t love that? He’s honorable and believes in the organization he belongs to.
I don’t love that he cannot do anything right. It feels like he wins fights by falling over and tripping into succeeding. And this character deserves so much more than that. Can we please, just once, see him be good at something or make a sound decision?
All that being said, this was still a fun episode. It was funny and bright, with an ominous feel and a horrific finger-ridden monster. I had a great time with it.
(4 / 5)
Last night’s episode of American Horror Story Delicate was wild. From its star-studded start to its powerfully quiet finish, I was enthralled through every moment.
Let’s discuss.
The story
We begin this episode at the funeral of Dex’s mom. While he’s giving a eulogy, which was very nice, Ms. Preecher walks in. She shouts to the room that Virginia didn’t commit suicide, she was murdered. She also tells Dex to listen to his wife.
What a concept!
Touched by this, or maybe just curious, Anna goes to the hospital to check on Preecher. She falls asleep at the hospital. When she wakes up, Preecher is gone. A nurse says that she was discharged to a group of women.
While at the hospital, Anna also discovers that she’s been nominated for best actress.
At a publicity event for the awards, Anna runs into Cora. And she sees the coat she remembers from her late-night visit near the start of her pregnancy.
With the slightest amount of pressure, Cora spills it all. She and Dex have been having an affair, and Cora was trying to sabotage Anna’s pregnancy. So Anna, channeling her inner Madison Montgomery, kicks him out and heads to the awards ceremony with Siobhan.
There, Siobhan asks her if she wants an Oscar more than anything. If she’d be willing to give up anything for it.
And Anna says yes.
The bargain is then sealed with a kiss.
What worked
I’d like to begin, paradoxically, at the end of the episode. We’ve seen Anna have some terrible, loud, frightening hallucinations in this season. At least, we assume they’re hallucinations. But this one wasn’t loud. It was, in fact, very quiet. Anna is led off stage, without a word, leaving nothing but a puddle of blood behind.
In horror, like in all art, the notes you don’t play are as important as the ones you do. And the notes that weren’t played her rang like a bell.
I also appreciated that this episode describes why being a celebrity would be a huge pain in the ass. Imagine going to an event where the whole purpose is for people to take pictures of you while holding their product. Imagine if they invaded your personal space, sprayed things on you, put things over your eyes, and you were expected to smile and pose.
I don’t know what it is about being a celebrity that makes others feel entitled to a person. To talk with them, take their time, and share in their moments. To touch them without consent. Yes, there are way worse things happening to people. But this isn’t a great way to live. It’s no wonder so many of them go nuts. This is most clearly shown in the scene when Anna is sitting next to Preecher’s bed. She wakes up to find the older woman gone. But all anyone wants to talk about is how she was just nominated for an Oscar. At that moment, she doesn’t give a damn. She cares about this kind woman, and where she’s gone. Just like any other person.
Finally, I appreciated that this season didn’t do what so many AHS seasons do. Which is to say that this episode didn’t feel like the last episode. It felt like the penultimate episode. It felt like there was still more story to tell, not just loose ends to be wrapped up. I appreciate that the writers have finally learned that lesson.
For this season, at least.
What didn’t work
The first thing that bothered me in this episode was Cora’s confession. I said something about this during our live-watch event on Threads. (Join us next week for the finale. Bring popcorn and wine.)
I don’t believe Cora’s confession. I further don’t believe that she just dumped all of this incriminating info on Anna with no more prompting than a wide-eyed look. There was just no reason for it. So, Anna saw her coat? Lots of people have similar coats. This feels fake, and she brought no receipts.
I also found Siobhan’s behavior confusing. At times she seems genuinely concerned for Anna’s wellbeing. At other times, she is more than willing to let her suffer and risk her pregnancy.
While this has been going on all season, it was happening every few minutes in this one. Either Siobhan cares about the welfare of that fetus, or she doesn’t. But she needs to pick a lane.
All in all, I don’t know what to expect from next week’s season finale. Anna has her Oscar, but now she might lose her baby. She might also get sucked into some horrible cult and experience a bad death. We won’t know until next week.
See you then.
(4 / 5)
