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As soon as one young couple tore down the yellow caution tape plastered across the front door, picked the locks and entered the abandoned house, the rest of the neighbors in the cul-de-sac followed suit. They were all curious about this two story colonial, for its owner was recently arrested for killing 15 elderly couples every Easter Sunday for the last six years. 

“I always knew something was off about him,” one man said as he thumbed through a dusty collection of vinyl records. “Tony and I would invite him to our fishing trips and he never once accepted. Always had plans.”

“I always have plans when you invite me on your fishing trips.” Another man smirked as he tossed a broken digital camera on the sofa. “Does that make me a serial killer, too?” 

Despite the cops leaving the home in disarray after searching for evidence, it was a rather unique, tidy place. The countertops were clean, the hardwood floors had a post-mop shine. The only thing discerning component was a rotten smell lingering from the spare bedroom, a stench no amount of cleaning product could mask. 

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“Innocent until proven guilty,” one woman rifling through the storage closet said. 

“Edna, you’ve seen the news!” her husband yelled from the kitchen. “They literally found all the bodies that he stored in one of the bedrooms. The guy made no effort to hide them. Who knows what he did with them in there? Probably Ted Bundy and Ed Gein stuff going on in there.”

“Wouldn’t that be fucking something,” a young teenager muttered under her breath. 

One man dropped a flower vase and frantically covered his child’s ears. “Hey! Maybe you want to not talk like that in front of my kid?”

“Dude, you literally brought your kid into a serial killer’s house. I think he can handle the fuck word.”

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The conversations carried as they explored the rest of the house and found boxes of small glass eyes, a china tea set, an early 2000’s computer and monitor, little mirrors shaped like suns, a desk filled with crumpled papers and religious books, lightbulbs filled with dead succulents, bookshelves with DVD’s and action figures and video games. There were a couple rocking chairs, spoons, lamps, paintings of rabbits, a family of taxidermized rats, a starved Ficus, deer antlers, photo albums, a broken grandfather clock. 

Everyone was in the kitchen now, their tote bags and purses filled with the serial killer’s belongings. Some put little sticky notes with their names on them on the bigger items. A group of teenagers discovered beer in the fridge and vodka in the freezer. The little break-in had turned into the essence of a neighborhood block party.  

Edna was holding a framed polaroid of the serial killer when she said to herself, “He’s been to our house before. I met two of the victims, actually.”

The chatter came to a halt as everyone took in her words. 

“Edna? What? When did that happen?” her husband asked. 

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“That one Easter a few years ago, when you decided to go on one of Tony’s fishing trips and leave me alone. He was the only one in the neighborhood who wasn’t busy, so I invited him over. It was the first and last time I ever talked to him. He said he had company and I asked him to bring them over. They were all sweet, he said they were his parents or something. I don’t know if they actually were. We went back here for dessert and ate right where I’m sitting.”

“What happened after that?” the young teenager asked. 

Edna thought about it for a moment, tightening her grip on the frame, her hands shaking, her nose scrunching in disgust. Tears welled up in her eyes, she felt her cheeks burning. Suddenly she shook her head and smiled as she looked up at the audience of neighbors staring at her, eyes wide and mouths gaped. “Nothing. Nothing at all. I thanked him for the dessert, went home and never heard about the couple again. And now here we are.”

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CourtCourt is a writer, horror enthusiast, and may or may not be your favorite human-eating houseplant.

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3 Comments

3 Comments

  1. David Davis

    March 24, 2021 at 2:42 am

    That was one dessert she will never forget.

  2. Jennifer Weigel

    March 25, 2021 at 7:50 pm

    Skeletons in more than one closet…

  3. VoodooPriestess

    March 25, 2021 at 8:50 pm

    The guilt from you suddenly humanizing everyone and thing at the end? Brutal.

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Original Creations

Simple Pleasures, a story about getting away by Jennifer Weigel

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-Mountains-

A serene mountain landscape yawns; monumental evergreen trees fingering a brilliant azure sky stroked with wispy clouds.  The air is crisper and fresher here, wafting its piney fragrance along the meandering deer path that bends and swerves down the gradual slope…

-Reset-

-City-

A bustling urban environment beckons, its diverse, brightly-clothed denizens laughing with one another, casually parting as you stroll through their midst.   Sunlight dances through the crowd, reflecting off of towering buildings, cars, and bicycles.  Sounds swell together as though breathing life into all interconnected within this rich tapestry of time and space.  The street is a cacophony of alluring smells, and the savory scent of kosher all-beef hot dogs…

-Vegetarian-

Fragrant cumin zing of vegetable samosas…

-European-

Perfume of freshly baked baguettes embraces you in a warm hug as you sit at a small metal café table, savoring an espresso…

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-Caffeine Free-

Lavender cremosa…

-Non-Carbonated-

Limonade…

-Reset-

-Beach-

The warm sand squishes between your bare toes as the soft ocean waves lap at your feet, beckoning you to wade further into the cool water…

-No Swimming-

The woven rope hammock stretched between two perfectly-spaced palm trees sways slowly as you lounge in its cradle, sipping a Mai Tai…

-Non-Alcoholic-

Iced lemonade in a highball glass through a red plastic straw…

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-Eco-Conscientious-

Paper straw, the citrusy elixir providing respite from the steamy…

-Less Hot-

Warm breezy summer…

-Spring-

Spring air, children…

-Nature-

Birds…

-Silence-

You close your eyes, hammock gently rocking you to slumber.

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We here at My Universe wish to thank you again for choosing our services.  We know that there are many post-cataclysmic alternative realities available, and we appreciate your business.  Please enjoy your respite from the societal collapse, and remember us next time you need to unwind.

Pineapple getting away from it all
Pineapple getting away from it all

And feel free to check out more of Jennifer Weigel’s work here on Haunted MTL or here on her website. And if you really feel like getting away and helping clean up the beach a bit, check out this relaxing video from Dylan Clark titled Seagrass. Or maybe that wasn’t so relaxing after all… 😉

Portrait of myself with dark makeup and crow skull headdress, backlit by the sun.
Portrait of myself with dark makeup and crow skull headdress, backlit by the sun.

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Original Creations

The Scent of Blood: Comic Book Art by Jennifer Weigel

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Somehow I came across an older Midnight Panther comic book, Feudal Fantasy #2 from the late 1990s to be precise, and I thought I’d reappropriate it into a new story as a collage. Anyway, this is what evolved. Honestly there wasn’t a lot of content to work with, but that isn’t surprising seeing as how that wasn’t really the point of the original… And sorry, I saved the erotic bits for another project, though even that was pretty tame in this one – just a bunch of boobies.

The Scent of Blood comic book art
The Scent of Blood comic book art

Images: Black and white line drawings of wide-eyed anime women and men in various states of undress, looking cute, being coyly pensive, and hack ‘n slashing.

Text reads: I like… men who are dying. We ought to just kill everyone involved. The scent of blood!! I never see his face, he always wears a mask. What a waste of time. I don’t like this. The horny bastard. What a pig!! -Slash- Sounds like it could be fun.

Ferryman comic book art

Images: More black and white line drawings of wide-eyed anime women and men kissing and hack ‘n slashing.

Text reads: Mercenaries of glorious Edo, if you can make the flowers that bloom along the rivers during spring drop their petals, then do so. I’m the Ferryman of the River Styx. Whssh.

OK, OK – here are some boobies since you stuck with this so long. And here’s a link to some more of my comic book collages, in case you are interested.

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Portrait of myself with dark makeup and crow skull headdress, backlit by the sun.
Portrait of myself with dark makeup and crow skull headdress, backlit by the sun.

And feel free to check out more of Jennifer Weigel’s work here on Haunted MTL or here on her website.

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Original Creations

Bonus Black Friday story: Zombie Apocalypse by Jennifer Weigel

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Black Friday.

You can’t beat the deals.  So many of us.  Waiting.  Readying.  Checking the time.  Counting down the seconds.  You better believe I earned my place at the start of the line.  I’ve been camping out here since late Wednesday.  Yeah, yeah, the holiday was yesterday.  Whatever, I had my family’s full endorsement.

Because that new high-definition television beckons.  The best in zoning out technology.  All channel access.  Cutting edge entertainment.  Bleeding edge.  That blade is sharp, baby.  Like a razor.

But this kind of escapism is costly.  A reality check says it’s not in my family’s budget.  We don’t make that kind of money, and so here I am.  Among all the others vying for the same prize.

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Only one will get there first.  Only one available.  Must have TV.  Must have T.V.  Must.  Have.  T.  V.

An employee approaches the door.  Nobody noteworthy.  A soon-to-be-casualty.  No more.  No less.

We rise and lurch into place.  Ready…

On your mark.

Get set.

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Go!

Black Friday Dealz... Must Have TV... Zombie Apocalypse
Black Friday Dealz… Must Have TV… Zombie Apocalypse

Original images generated with Nightcafe AI art generator.

Portrait of myself with dark makeup and crow skull headdress, backlit by the sun.
Portrait of myself with dark makeup and crow skull headdress, backlit by the sun.

And feel free to check out more of Jennifer Weigel’s work here on Haunted MTL or here on her website. Or if you just want more zombies, might I recommend either Elvis or the Fashionistas?

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