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I’m going to blunt here and just straight out say that most likely everyone who sees this French art-house film, Jessica Forever, will hate it. I liked it, but I’m definitely in the minority. Out of those who see it, maybe 99% will either hate it or just stop watching before the 10-minute mark. If you don’t believe me just go look at its audience score on IMDB. A sad 4.6! Also, the member reviews on Shudder say violently negative things.

The criticisms aren’t completely uncalled for. The film is slow, confusing, and slightly tedious (actually a lot tedious). The dialogue feels as if the writers shortened everything to just the bare minimum and left the characters to insensibly talk in scenes that never end. Then there’s the issue of the plot itself, but we’ll get to that in a minute.

Despite all this, I really like the movie. I think it’s because of the whole first half that was much more interesting than the second and third acts. The major flaw here is that Jessica Forever expects too much of its audience. Caroline Poggi and Jonathan Vinel, who wrote and directed the film together, assume that their viewers are willing to dig through the many layers and interpret the film on their own.

More mystery than story

Jessica Forever is about a woman named Jessica (Aomi Muyock) and her makeshift family that consists of violent teenage boys that she’s taken in. They’re comparable to wild animals tamed by her affection, rehabilitated into peaceful warriors. It’s a dystopian film set in the distant future where orphans are outlawed and self-trained as soldiers, but the reason behind it is never explained. Outside of their isolation, a single shootout and the graphic image of the word “orphan” branded on someone’s chest, the film rarely displays their struggles and never offers up any real explanation as to why they’re struggling at all.

Why are orphans outlawed? How come they’re hunted down by killer drones? Why do they live like animals in the woods? How would the police even know they’re orphans in the first place? Who knows.

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The strangest part is how relatively normal the rest of the world is. Malls are open, schools are open, cities are intact and people live normally. No one from the outside world seems to care about outlawed orphans running loose. It makes the danger feel insignificant, like a fantasyland they’ve imagined for themselves. Without any information outside of what’s directly happening on the screen, the story deflates way before it ever gets the chance to properly develop. It’s really about loneliness. If the word “lonely” came to life and became a movie, this would be it.

A potential relationship wasted

Despite having her name in the title, Jessica is not the star. Her role is more of a background presence guiding her adoptees. The driving force of the story is a boy named Kevin (Eddy Suiveng) who is taken in by Jessica and her group in the beginning. It’s his introduction that starts the film and his (spoiler alert) death that turns everything around.

When Kevin joins the group, he struggles to control his violent impulses before learning how to fit in with the others. He forms an intimate bond with fellow orphan Julian (Lukas Ionesco). The way they interact implies that they’re closer than friends or brothers, they seem to find a new type of comfort within each other. I loved this part of the movie, it got me infested in Kevin and his relationship with Julian and the other boys. It could have held up the film singlehandedly but then, 30 minutes in, Kevin dies and Julian becomes depressed.

That’s the death of the film for me. After that, it transitions into a new phase with less interesting characters and less interesting storylines. It’s a thinker movie, don’t watch it if you want to be entertained, but it’s truly a piece of art. Every shot is just beautiful.

2.5 out of 5 stars (2.5 / 5)

All photos are property of Shudder and Ecce Films Production

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Rachel Roth is a writer who lives in South Florida. She has a degree in Writing Studies and a Certificate in Creative Writing, her work has appeared in several literary journals and anthologies. @WinterGreenRoth

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Goosebumps, The Vanishing Comes in Hot With Don’t Go In The Basement

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Goosebumps is back with season two, The Vanishing. All eight episodes dropped yesterday, January 10th.

Today, we’re talking about episode one, Stay Out of The Basement Part 1. This episode gets its title from the second of the original Goosebumps series. How much else does it get from this source material? Let’s find out.

The story

Our story begins in 1994, with a group of teens planning to spend the night in an abandoned building called Gravesend. And we are surely made aware that it is indeed Ye Olde 1994 with Beastie Boys blaring and references to X Files. Thank you, show writers, for making me feel as old as possible as quickly as possible.

For reference, the flashbacks from season one took place in 1993. I don’t know if these two stories exist in the same universe, but it stands to reason they do. So it couldn’t hurt to keep track of a timeline.

The teens’ plans are ruined when one of them, a boy named Matty, is infected with some horrific thing that seems to melt him before the very eyes of his friends.

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We then cut to 2024, where our story really begins. Two kids, Cece and Devin Brewer, are coming to spend the summer with their dad, Anthony. Anthony is Matty’s younger brother. He is now an adult and excited to have his twins spending the summer with him. He only has one rule for them.

Don’t go in the basement.

As it turns out, nothing in the basement will hurt the kids. Until Devin and Cece end up in Gravesend, and accidentally bring home the exact entity that killed their uncle thirty years ago.

What worked

The first thing that stood out to me was the connections that Cece and Devin have to this town, while still being outsiders.

David Schwimmer, Sam McCarthy and Jayden Bartels in Goosebumps The Vanishing.

Their dad, Anthony, lives there full-time. And while the twins seem to spend some time there, they really haven’t in years. This puts them in a liminal position of being both newcomers and having ties to the place. They know some people, but not most of their peers. But everyone knows their family, because of the tragic death of their uncle. This is a good way to have some flexible characters. They are both from there and not from there. It works.

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I also liked that this first episode has clear ties to the book it’s named for, while not being bound to it. In Don’t Go In The Basement, the kids have to save their father, Mr. Brewer, from the terrifying plant clone trying to take over his life. (Sorry for the spoiler. But the book did come out over thirty years ago.)

While this storyline is going to inspire at least some of our storyline, it’s clear that we’re going to go far above and beyond that. I appreciate that we’re keeping the integrity of the source material, while not being shackled to it.

Finally, I like that Anthony seems like a good dad. He’s worried about his kids. He’s excited to spend time with them. He’s quick to not involve them in fights with his ex, their mom. When he asks them not to go in the basement, he then takes them down to show them that he’s not hiding anything, it’s just not a safe place for them. All good dad points. Even better, we see that Devin goes to his dad when he’s scared. We get the feeling that Anthony would have listened to him if he hadn’t been fending off a homicidal vine at the time.

What didn’t work

I only have one complaint about this first episode. In the very beginning, we see the death of Matty. But, it’s really fast.

Not that I wanted to see a teenager suffer, but we see his face go dark and melt so fast, you’ll blink if you miss it.

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For one thing, that lets the viewer off too easy. This is our first dark moment. It should be a little slower. We should focus on the fear and anguish for a few more moments. Especially since this death is going to be the cornerstone of our story for the season.

While I am disappointed that this means we were in fact left on that terrible cliffhanger from season one, I’m happy with how this season is starting. The characters are interesting, the story is dark, and I’m excited to see how it plays out.

4 out of 5 stars (4 / 5)

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Bloody Axe Wound: A Slasher Flick with Daddy Issues and a Side of Feminism

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Alright, you sick puppies, gather ’round for a tale of family bonding, teenage angst, and good old-fashioned murder. “Bloody Axe Wound” is here to tickle your funny bone and possibly remove a few other bones while it’s at it.

Woman with bikini covered in blood from Bloody Axe Wound

The Gist: Serial Killing as a Family Business

Picture this: a video store that’s actually a front for some seriously messed up snuff films. The twist? The owner’s a serial killer who’s been slicing and dicing teens faster than you can say “late fees.” But wait, there’s more! His daughter, Abby Blake Cut (yeah, that’s her name, deal with it), wants in on the family business. Talk about bring-your-daughter-to-work day gone horribly wrong!

“Bloody Axe Wound” is like “90210” decided to do a crossover with “Halloween” – Jim Phoenix, HauntedMTL

Daddy’s Little Monster

So, Daddy Dearest isn’t too keen on his baby girl following in his bloody footsteps. I mean, come on, it’s 2024 – girls can be anything they want, even psychopathic murderers! But our guy’s stuck in the past, probably still thinks women belong in the kitchen (chopping vegetables, not people).

Jennifer’s Body [Blu-ray]
  • Factory sealed DVD
  • Megan Fox, Amanda Seyfried, Johnny Simmons (Actors)
  • Karyn Kusama (Director) – Diablo Cody (Writer) – Mason Novick (Producer)

Last update on 2025-01-07 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

A Feminist Slasher? You Bet Your Ass!

Abby’s not just fighting for her right to party (and by party, I mean brutally murder people). She’s breaking down barriers in the male-dominated field of serial killing. Move over, Jason and Freddy – there’s a new blade in town (no, not Mahershala Ali…only one real Blade…), and she’s got a point to prove (several points, actually, all of them sharp).

Horror Tropes Galore

This flick’s got more tropes than a teenager’s got hormones:

  • Awkward sexual exploration? Check.
  • That one friend who’s way too old to be hanging with high schoolers? You betcha.
  • A cursed town where everyone’s oblivious to the killer in their midst? Oh, honey, it’s all here.

It’s like “90210” decided to do a crossover with “Halloween,” and somehow it works!

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Ginger Snaps (Collector’s Edition) [Blu-ray]
  • Factory sealed DVD
  • Kristopher Lemche, Emily Perkins, Katharine Isabelle (Actors)
  • John Fawcett (Director) – Steven Hoban (Producer)

Last update on 2025-01-07 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

The Verdict: 4.5 out of 5 Bloody Thumbs Up

Look, I’m not saying “Bloody Axe Wound” is gonna win any Oscars (unless they finally add that “Best Dismemberment” category I’ve been lobbying for). But hot damn, it’s a fun ride. It’s got laughs, it’s got gore, it’s got a weirdly heartwarming father-daughter story if you squint hard enough. This one is a rewatchable movie and probably a cult classic for many of us.

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So, grab your popcorn, leave your sensitivity at the door, and get ready for a movie that’ll make you laugh, cringe, and possibly reconsider your family dynamics. Just remember: the family that slays together, stays together!

4.5 out of 5 stars (4.5 / 5)

P.S. Don’t bring the kids. Unless you want them to have a very awkward conversation with their school counselor.

P.P.S. Sorry, once again, for killing your name in our podcast…

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Dexter Original Sin F is for Fuck-Up dives deeper into the horrors of a beloved character

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Episode five of Original Sin was surprisingly light. At least, as light as a show can be when it involves murder, teenage drug use, and the anniversary of the death of a beloved parent.

The story

We begin this episode right where the last one left off. Mad Dog, Dexter’s latest victim, is hit by a car and killed. This leaves Dexter with the unpleasant chore of cleaning up a crime scene but not being able to actually kill someone.

Patrick Gibson in Dexter Original Sin.

Meanwhile, Harry is getting ready for the trial of Levi Reed. This trial seems like it will be a slam dunk, except for one terrible surprise. Turns out Harry messed up and hid what probably wouldn’t have been evidence strong enough to dismiss the case until he hid it.

What worked

One of the reasons why Dexter is so popular is that it’s funny. While it is a show that deals with very heavy subject matter, it’s also managed to be funny most of the time.

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This episode is funny. It starts with Dex cursing over and over while he frantically and meticulously cleans up his crime scene, then hiding in a corner with a bag of incriminating trash. We later see him eat way too many pot brownies and get high as a kite, then eat two pizzas while laughing at I Love Lucy with Deb.

These are funny scenes that fit into the heaviness of the show. It doesn’t feel like emotional whiplash when we go from the kids getting high to Harry having a mental breakdown because that makes sense. Rather than forcing humor where it doesn’t belong, the writers made this comedy make sense.

I also loved that we’re seeing Dexter become who he will be. He’s terrified of losing control. He’s always learning how to kill more efficiently. And for someone who claims to not have regular human emotions, he already seems to understand a lot more about how the people around him are likely to act.

At least, he gets how Harry’s going to respond.

I like that he’s not just a teen version of the same character. I like that we’re seeing how this young mentally ill man changed into the adult mentally ill man we all know and love.

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Finally, we are really seeing the depths of how bad of a cop, and frankly a person, Harry is. Because Harry isn’t a good person.

Patrick Dempsey, Reno Wilson and James Martinez in Dexter Original Sin.

He withheld evidence in a murder trial because he just didn’t consider it valid.

He ignored his kids, especially Deb when they needed him.

He’s having an affair with his CI, which is not only bad because he’s a married man, but because he’s taking advantage of a huge power imbalance between the two of them.

And finally, when he singlehandedly lost a murder trial, he got drunk and almost shot a man. When he couldn’t do it himself, he let Dexter off the leash.

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Harry is a bad person. And that’s kind of awesome. That’s the sort of villain origin story that I love to see. He is a more interesting character because of this. And Dexter is more understandable because of what we understand about the man who raised him.

What didn’t work

It took me a while to look over this episode of Dexter Original Sin and find something to complain about. And honestly, there’s one part of this season that’s been bothering me.

I don’t love that Harry is spending so much time with little Dexter. It just doesn’t make sense to me. At least, not with the story of the original show.

Especially in the first season, it’s clear that Dexter doesn’t remember anything before the death of his mother. That makes sense, as he was very very small. But this little Dexter feels like he would have been old enough to remember some of this.

But, you might say, he was traumatized. He watched his mother be brutally slaughtered and was left for days in a shipping crate with his mother’s body. And yeah, it does make sense that he would forget a lot.

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But would he never have the slightest inkling that he was now being raised by the man who suddenly showed up in his life, babysat him, and tucked him lovingly into bed?

Overall, this was a great episode. It was funny, touching, and moved along several storylines. I’m excited to see what comes next. 4 out of 5 stars (4 / 5)

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