It’s no secret that Haunted MTL absolutely loves The Last Drive-In on Shudder. However, we do have some small suggestions and a wish or two for the upcoming second season that we wanted to float for the producers, drive-in mutants, and Joe Bob Briggs himself.
So, what do we want to see?
Separately archived host segments are a must
The first marathon of The Last Drive-In had many great moments tied to particular films. The problem is, though, that sometimes Shudder cannot keep the rights to those films. This means that all of the great Joe Bob Briggs moments during The Legend of Boggy Creek, for example, are now officially lost for fans outside of YouTube.
Our request is simple: Consider archiving the host segments of the show separately from the films as well so that they can be enjoyed as special features with each season or marathon of the series. We need immediate and ready access to Joe Bob singing “Nobody Sees the Flowers Bloom But Me.”
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More guests are always good
Joe Bob Briggs is a fantastic host who bounces off guests masterfully. In fact, guests have become a fun treat of The Last Drive-In in general. From Felissa Rose’s mangled-dick expertise to seeing the legendary Barbara Crampton sitting outside the trailer, guests inject something special into the whole formula of the show that could be utilized a lot more.
One example could be the creation of another segment. Felissa’s hotline is always fun when a mangled member is plot-relevant, but how about some other potential experts? Maybe Joe Bob should take a spin through the Rolodex and call in a favor or two.
A wish for Troma movies
We admit that this will take some doing. There isn’t a movie studio quite as adept at the drive-in weirdness as Troma Entertainment, and any number of their movies would be perfect for The Last Drive-In. This all comes down to streaming rights negotiations and complicated things most mutants are not even qualified to attempt to unpack, but The Toxic Avenger would make for a great part of a double-feature, wouldn’t it?
Plus, imagine Lloyd Kaufman stopping by for a little chat at the drive-in. We’re already salivating at the idea.
More Japanese movies, please!
Some of the most insane films shown on The Last Drive-In have been from Japan. The Drive-In Totals for Wolf Guy alone were a masterclass in film excess that was only really matched by Street Trash. Plus, we’re still absolutely puzzled over just what the hell happened in Dead or Alive. So, getting down to it, mutants everywhere wish for more drive-in trips to Japan.
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Basically, Japanese cinema needs to continue to be a part of the drive-in tradition, especially if the creative team can tailor those moments to the show, such as using that hilarious title card featuring Ernie, the resident lizard.
A longer break between films would be nice
Sometimes the live stream can be a bit of a bladder-buster. It makes sense given the large block of time that The Last Drive-In could occupy (over 4 hours with some episodes) that too long a run time could prove to be a scheduling issue. Generally, between the two films, Shudder runs a trailer for a film. It kind of evokes the feeling of grindhouse cinema and it could really be a help to the bathroom-bound audience to maybe run two to three trailers, if possible. Surely some mutants have made this sort of wish as they ran from the tv to the toilet, right?
We wish for a live audience of Mutants
Hearing the audience of the crew bouncing off of Joe Bob Briggs is one of those small little joys that are unique to The Last Drive-In and MonsterVision back in the day. Joe Bob asking the crew if they knew a fact, or their occasional whoops and hollers at the namedropping of a cult movie make the show feel super communal.
This is a big ask, but if possible, a live audience of drive-in mutants for the show would be incredible. Naturally, the logistics of episode production would dictate the process, but perhaps a live audience for the host segments and a later screening of the movie for the mutants might prove possible?
Could we have a half-hour spinoff?
Part of the joy of The Last Drive-In is simply hearing Joe Bob’s tales about cult films and the weirdos behind them. There’s also the fact he brings on great guests who are only there for a very short amount of time.
So, maybe this is us just being greedy, but we would love to see a simple half-hour show that expands on the weekly host segments with longer interviews, more stories, and the always popular Joe Bob rants. It could even be a sort of preview of coming attractions as well with hints about the upcoming double feature. Basically, we wish for even more Joe Bob, and it doesn’t necessarily need to be tied to a movie either.
To a lot of fans, this is the film that killed the franchise. It says a lot that the next installment is yet another retcon. Halloween VI: The Curse of Michael Myers attempts to explain Michael’s unrelenting evil, which lead to mixed opinions from longtime fans. There are two cuts of the film, theatrical vs producer’s. For a lot of people, the latter is the only one worth mentioning. Aiming to be as accurate as possible, I will be talking about the producer’s cut. Let’s begin!
Plot
We start Halloween VI with a six-year time jump from part five. Jamie is now barefoot and recently pregnant, running away from Michael as he wants her baby. While she manages to hide the little one away, Michael finally gets his hunger satiated by killing her. The moment is one of the most brutal ways in the franchise up until that point. Rest in peace, Jamie, you held your ground for as long as you could, the sequels were just too relentless.
The movie then cuts to a whole different scene going on. We have a new family living in the Myers house and their youngest child is hearing voices telling him to kill his loved ones. Tommy Lloyd is watching the family, played by none other than Paul Rudd in his first-ever theatrical role. Tommy still carries trauma from the events all those years ago when Laurie Strode was babysitting him. So when he finds Jamie’s baby, his part in the story becomes even more essential.
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Dr Loomis also stars in what was Donald Pleasance’s final role before his passing. He and Tommy try to stop Michael once and for all before the cycle can repeat itself. As it turns out, Michael is a victim of a druid cult which makes him want to kill his family members every Halloween. Thorn, the cult in question, thinks they can control Michael and make him do their bidding. This results in catastrophe and Michael goes berzerk and kills all the cult members. Once again, it’s one of the most gruesome montages for the franchise up until that point.
Tommy and Kara are left to face Michael on their own which they manage to do with some corrosive liquid and good luck. However, nothing stays dead in this franchise as it’s soon revealed Michael somehow escaped and this time Dr Loomis might not be so lucky…
Overall thoughts
I would say for me personally Halloween VI definitely ranks somewhere near the bottom. The whole point of Michael is that there is no rhyme or reason to his killings and this film tries to go against that. I am glad the mistake was rectified by the upcoming installment. There were still some good things about it, such as Paul Rudd’s acting that reveals some raw talent as far as I’m concerned, as well as some direction choices and musical score. However, I also think it absolutely deserves all the criticism that it gets.
We’ve reached the final episode of American Horror Stories, season three. After the ups and downs of the season, I didn’t know what to expect. I felt that we were due a big finish, Killer Queens. But I feared we were in for a big letdown.
As it turns out, The Thing Under The Bed was neither.
The story
We begin our story with a little girl named Mary, who is scared of something under her bed. She sneaks out of her room, only to be caught by her father and sent back to sleep. And of course, there is something horrible waiting for her under her bed.
This scene cuts away to a woman named Jillian. She has strange dreams, including one about Mary. But her husband, Mark, doesn’t want to hear about it. He’s only interested in a little lovemaking because he wants a baby. Jillian doesn’t, which makes total sense because she’s already married to one. But her irritation with her childish husband goes away when he goes away. And by goes away, I mean he’s sloppily devoured by something vicious under their bed.
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What worked
In short, this episode just worked. The acting was professional and believable. The cinematography and lighting work were wonderful, adding spooky effects and startling moments without impairing visibility.
Best of all, the story was solid. There were no plotholes to be found. Our main character, Jillian, was relatable and sympathetic.
This was maybe my favorite part of the story. I thought Jillian was a remarkably sympathetic character. She was dealt a hand she never asked for, having her husband slaughtered in their bedroom. I don’t think she missed him, so much as she was afraid of the legal ramifications of being caught with literal blood on her hands.
Then, when it would have been safest for her to just lay low and save up for a good defense attorney, she instead goes into unlikely hero mode. She does her best to save people, putting herself in legal and physical danger. It’s hard not to root for her.
It’s also a little hard not to root for the antagonist, too. I don’t want to ruin the twist for you, so I’m going to tread lightly here. But it’s great when you have an antagonist who might be off their rocker, but also maybe has a point.
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What didn’t work
I can only really think of one complaint with this episode. And that is how frequently one character says the word Chickadee. And if you’ve seen the episode, you know what I am talking about.
I get it, he has a pet name for his daughter. It’s adorable. It’s meant to convey that the two of them have a healthy loving relationship and I get it. We all get it. Blind monks get it. But the fact remains that no parent on Earth calls their kid by their pet name every single time they speak an individual sentence to them. It was just too damn much.
All in all, this was a good episode. It was a classic story, turned on its head, told by professionals from start to finish. And I hope that if there is another season, we see more stories like this one. But after the efforts put into this season at large, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the last we see of American Horror Stories.
If you’ve watched enough short-form horror anthology shows, you’ll notice that some stories are mainstays. Each show seems to put on the same sort of episodes, with the occasional surprising storyline that we’ve never (or at least rarely) seen before.
Leprechaun was an example of a repeated story—the story of a greedy thief whose punishment far outweighs the crime.
The story
We begin our story in 1841, with a drunk man leaving the bar one late night. He’s distracted by something glowing at the end of the well. When he reaches down for the glowing thing, he falls in. Moments later, he screams.
We then cut to the modern day. The well is still there, and now it’s surrounded by a dying town. In this town lives a young man named Colin. He’s married, his wife is pregnant, and he’s out of work. Like many of his friends.
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Desperate for cash, Colin and his friends decide to rob a bank. They put together an Equate version of Ocean’s Eleven, and break in one night. But, of course, they find that the gold is nothing more than bait. And the creature waiting for them is something they never expected.
What worked
The first thing I want to point out is how real this episode felt. At least to anyone currently living in the same small town they grew up in. These characters felt like guys I went to school with. Guys I would see at the bar.
I appreciated the real anger and frustration these characters are feeling. Especially Colin. He’s bitter, and maybe he has a right to be. He did exactly what he was supposed to do to succeed. He went to school and invested in his career, and yet now he’s out of work and struggling to support his family. I probably don’t need to tell you how that feels. Because of this, we can all kind of understand why he was tempted to rob a bank.
I also want to talk about the fact that this was, as I said, an often-explored story. That can be a bad thing, but it can also be a good thing. This story is told over and over because it’s a good story. A relatable story. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
What didn’t work
That being said, this version didn’t try to do much to break out of the mold.
Because we have seen this story so many times, most of us could tell the story themselves. I would have expected something new, or some twist. But, in the end, the story didn’t bring anything new to the discussion.
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Maybe because of this, the ending left a lot to be desired. Trapped in the basement of the bank, everyone just sort of stares at everyone else, until the thieves give up. And that’s it. The ending wasn’t scary, shocking, or funny. It was just sad, on multiple levels.
Overall, this was an okay story. It was entertaining, if not surprising. I would compare this episode to homemade macaroni and cheese. Everyone’s got their own version, they’re all pretty good, and none of them are exciting.
There’s just one episode left in this season of American Horror Stories. Let’s hope they’ve saved the best for last.
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