‘Relic’ review: A unique take on the haunted house story
In a story about family and the aging process, Relic hits in places where most don’t. People always die in horror movies but most aren’t designed to purposely remind us of our mortality, of the indignity that it brings, and the alienation that comes with it. Relic is a unique take on the traditional haunted house story in which the past itself is the ghost. People, buildings, items of possession, they all have pasts. A time when they were fresh and new and all we can do is remember them in their prime as they inch closer towards decay.
Ghosts are usually metaphors for the past but Relic is more straightforward. There isn’t actually any ghost in the film, although it vaguely implies that there might be one for the sake of keeping the supernatural element alive but Relic is about age. Age and death, the terror it brings, and the heartbreaking acceptance of it. It really isn’t even that subtle. The damn title tells you what you need to know, “Relic,” for elders are often considered to be relics of the past. Don’t go in expecting to see some grand Lovecraftian monster at the end because there isn’t one and you’ll be greatly disappointed.
(Spoilers below)
Edna (Robyn Nevin) is a widowed elderly woman who has been having memory problems. Loneliness is her constant companion and dementia is coming in close behind. She leaves post-it notes everywhere reminding her of common everyday things like “turn off the facet,” “lock the door,” and “take pills.” One day she goes missing. The opening scene of the film leading up to her disappearance is probably my favorite part. Silently built around tension and creepy as hell, it’s a strong start to open the mystery.
Edna’s scattered post-it notes reveal that she believes something has been following her, making her think and forget things.
After she goes missing, her daughter Kay (Emily Mortimer) and granddaughter Sam (Bella Heathcote), arrive to help look for her and they have the typical generational conflicts going on between them, especially in regards to Edna. They figured she’s wandered off and realize that when they eventually find her, she can’t be left alone anymore. Sam doesn’t know why Kay can’t just move Edna in with her and take care of her full time but as for Kay, the inconvenience is too much, not to mention the responsibility. “That’s how it works isn’t it, she changes your nappies and then you change hers,” Sam says.
Meanwhile, there are no clues to Edna’s disappearance except for a strange mold that’s spread across the house and strange noises that come from behind the walls. But then out of the blue, Edna magically returns. She just reappears without any explanation, covered in bruises and refusing to say where she went.
Tensions rise once Edna returns. Sam and Kay aren’t equipped to handle her increasing confusion and agitation. They’re all waiting for things to get back to normal; Sam wants back her sweet n’ salty grandmother who taught her the piano, Kay just wants to feel at ease again so that she can get back to work, and Edna wants to go back to her daily routine. However, there is no going back to normal and as she gets worse, there grows a layer of dread over them all like rot on a wet ceiling. It keeps growing and growing until it’s spread everywhere. The wetness causing black mildew to drip down to the floor and stain the carpet; same as the mysterious mold spreading through the house.
The “ghost” of the house, the rot it’s inflicting, is an extension of the death approaching upon Edna, affecting her body and mind. While looking through her grandmother’s closet, Sam finds another part of the house blocked off with clutter where the mold has spread the worst. It leads into a never-ending series of passages and doorways, the walls donning Edna’s sticky note reminders; “my mother’s eyes are green,” “my name is Edna.” The further she goes, the smaller the hallways become, and soon the final stages of Edna’s “possession” begins.
Verdict
Directed by Natalie Erika James and written by James and Christian White, Relic is incredibly slow but still feels like it’s runtime. It’s 89 minutes, the perfect length in a world where almost every critical darling is 2h 45 min long. It moves along very quietly, building up to a House of Leaves type climax that suddenly dials down into a heartbreaking moment between mothers and daughters, the finale image of the film is emotive. A finale that sums up the painful and beautiful human experience.
By the way, what’s with movies this year including houses with never-ending mazes behind the walls? First You Should Have Left and now this? What’s going on? Although the maze in this house is much better than the one in David Koepp’s film.
(4 / 5)
Photos property of IFC Midnight and Screen Austrailia
To a lot of fans, this is the film that killed the franchise. It says a lot that the next installment is yet another retcon. Halloween VI: The Curse of Michael Myers attempts to explain Michael’s unrelenting evil, which lead to mixed opinions from longtime fans. There are two cuts of the film, theatrical vs producer’s. For a lot of people, the latter is the only one worth mentioning. Aiming to be as accurate as possible, I will be talking about the producer’s cut. Let’s begin!
Plot
We start Halloween VI with a six-year time jump from part five. Jamie is now barefoot and recently pregnant, running away from Michael as he wants her baby. While she manages to hide the little one away, Michael finally gets his hunger satiated by killing her. The moment is one of the most brutal ways in the franchise up until that point. Rest in peace, Jamie, you held your ground for as long as you could, the sequels were just too relentless.
The movie then cuts to a whole different scene going on. We have a new family living in the Myers house and their youngest child is hearing voices telling him to kill his loved ones. Tommy Lloyd is watching the family, played by none other than Paul Rudd in his first-ever theatrical role. Tommy still carries trauma from the events all those years ago when Laurie Strode was babysitting him. So when he finds Jamie’s baby, his part in the story becomes even more essential.
Dr Loomis also stars in what was Donald Pleasance’s final role before his passing. He and Tommy try to stop Michael once and for all before the cycle can repeat itself. As it turns out, Michael is a victim of a druid cult which makes him want to kill his family members every Halloween. Thorn, the cult in question, thinks they can control Michael and make him do their bidding. This results in catastrophe and Michael goes berzerk and kills all the cult members. Once again, it’s one of the most gruesome montages for the franchise up until that point.
Tommy and Kara are left to face Michael on their own which they manage to do with some corrosive liquid and good luck. However, nothing stays dead in this franchise as it’s soon revealed Michael somehow escaped and this time Dr Loomis might not be so lucky…
Overall thoughts
I would say for me personally Halloween VI definitely ranks somewhere near the bottom. The whole point of Michael is that there is no rhyme or reason to his killings and this film tries to go against that. I am glad the mistake was rectified by the upcoming installment. There were still some good things about it, such as Paul Rudd’s acting that reveals some raw talent as far as I’m concerned, as well as some direction choices and musical score. However, I also think it absolutely deserves all the criticism that it gets.
(2.5 / 5)
We’ve reached the final episode of American Horror Stories, season three. After the ups and downs of the season, I didn’t know what to expect. I felt that we were due a big finish, Killer Queens. But I feared we were in for a big letdown.
As it turns out, The Thing Under The Bed was neither.
The story
We begin our story with a little girl named Mary, who is scared of something under her bed. She sneaks out of her room, only to be caught by her father and sent back to sleep. And of course, there is something horrible waiting for her under her bed.
This scene cuts away to a woman named Jillian. She has strange dreams, including one about Mary. But her husband, Mark, doesn’t want to hear about it. He’s only interested in a little lovemaking because he wants a baby. Jillian doesn’t, which makes total sense because she’s already married to one. But her irritation with her childish husband goes away when he goes away. And by goes away, I mean he’s sloppily devoured by something vicious under their bed.
What worked
In short, this episode just worked. The acting was professional and believable. The cinematography and lighting work were wonderful, adding spooky effects and startling moments without impairing visibility.
Best of all, the story was solid. There were no plotholes to be found. Our main character, Jillian, was relatable and sympathetic.
This was maybe my favorite part of the story. I thought Jillian was a remarkably sympathetic character. She was dealt a hand she never asked for, having her husband slaughtered in their bedroom. I don’t think she missed him, so much as she was afraid of the legal ramifications of being caught with literal blood on her hands.
Then, when it would have been safest for her to just lay low and save up for a good defense attorney, she instead goes into unlikely hero mode. She does her best to save people, putting herself in legal and physical danger. It’s hard not to root for her.
It’s also a little hard not to root for the antagonist, too. I don’t want to ruin the twist for you, so I’m going to tread lightly here. But it’s great when you have an antagonist who might be off their rocker, but also maybe has a point.
What didn’t work
I can only really think of one complaint with this episode. And that is how frequently one character says the word Chickadee. And if you’ve seen the episode, you know what I am talking about.
I get it, he has a pet name for his daughter. It’s adorable. It’s meant to convey that the two of them have a healthy loving relationship and I get it. We all get it. Blind monks get it. But the fact remains that no parent on Earth calls their kid by their pet name every single time they speak an individual sentence to them. It was just too damn much.
All in all, this was a good episode. It was a classic story, turned on its head, told by professionals from start to finish. And I hope that if there is another season, we see more stories like this one. But after the efforts put into this season at large, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the last we see of American Horror Stories.
(4 / 5)
If you’ve watched enough short-form horror anthology shows, you’ll notice that some stories are mainstays. Each show seems to put on the same sort of episodes, with the occasional surprising storyline that we’ve never (or at least rarely) seen before.
Leprechaun was an example of a repeated story—the story of a greedy thief whose punishment far outweighs the crime.
The story
We begin our story in 1841, with a drunk man leaving the bar one late night. He’s distracted by something glowing at the end of the well. When he reaches down for the glowing thing, he falls in. Moments later, he screams.
We then cut to the modern day. The well is still there, and now it’s surrounded by a dying town. In this town lives a young man named Colin. He’s married, his wife is pregnant, and he’s out of work. Like many of his friends.
Desperate for cash, Colin and his friends decide to rob a bank. They put together an Equate version of Ocean’s Eleven, and break in one night. But, of course, they find that the gold is nothing more than bait. And the creature waiting for them is something they never expected.
What worked
The first thing I want to point out is how real this episode felt. At least to anyone currently living in the same small town they grew up in. These characters felt like guys I went to school with. Guys I would see at the bar.
I appreciated the real anger and frustration these characters are feeling. Especially Colin. He’s bitter, and maybe he has a right to be. He did exactly what he was supposed to do to succeed. He went to school and invested in his career, and yet now he’s out of work and struggling to support his family. I probably don’t need to tell you how that feels. Because of this, we can all kind of understand why he was tempted to rob a bank.
I also want to talk about the fact that this was, as I said, an often-explored story. That can be a bad thing, but it can also be a good thing. This story is told over and over because it’s a good story. A relatable story. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
What didn’t work
That being said, this version didn’t try to do much to break out of the mold.
Because we have seen this story so many times, most of us could tell the story themselves. I would have expected something new, or some twist. But, in the end, the story didn’t bring anything new to the discussion.
Maybe because of this, the ending left a lot to be desired. Trapped in the basement of the bank, everyone just sort of stares at everyone else, until the thieves give up. And that’s it. The ending wasn’t scary, shocking, or funny. It was just sad, on multiple levels.
Overall, this was an okay story. It was entertaining, if not surprising. I would compare this episode to homemade macaroni and cheese. Everyone’s got their own version, they’re all pretty good, and none of them are exciting.
There’s just one episode left in this season of American Horror Stories. Let’s hope they’ve saved the best for last.
(3.5 / 5)
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