Connect with us

Published

on

Hey-yo, kids. Recently I “went to” the Trans Steller Film Festival (Nov 26-Dec 3, 2023). And by went to, I mean I sat in my home like a grump, eating kettlecorn popcorn and a lukewarm diet soda.

It was heaven.

So, of course, being a horror critic (or something like that), I bought tickets to the Horror section of their short films, which included three shorts – THE SHACK – An Atmos-Fearic Thriller; THEYSUCK; and MICHAEL AND THE DRAGON.

Backstory, I didn’t read the small print and only watched the first one. Then the next day went to watch the other ones but my ticket expired so I had to pay again. So, that’s the REAL LGBTQ agenda…making me read the small print when I buy shit!

It's a meme that says, "watch all the films or you'll pay again" and Brannyk says, "that sign won't stop me because I can't read."

THE SHACK – An Atmos-Fearic Thriller

The Shack is about is a guy who has very loud music in his head, probably from drinking all the Cthulhu beer. He has a buddy come up into his hunting blind and then bonks the buddy on the head and drags him away. You think in some kind of caveman courtship, but no, it’s for a demon dressed in a raincoat to feed upon the friend.

Next he brings his son (who looks about the same age as he is) to the blind- er, shack? It’s not really a shack. It’s a hunting blind. And it’s really not all that creepy. And it does NOT look like it’s 100 years old like the son says. It looks like it was from the 70’s. It needs more centerfolds in it, like, of 70’s demons or something…

Anyway, spooky things happen and tentacle monsters. Things go downhill.

The issue I took (besides the music, because turn down that racket!) is that the ‘son’ is too old. If he were a twelve or thirteen year old, it would have been more emotionally impactful. The story would have been more interesting. Instead, the son looks old enough to drink Cthulhu beer with dad and it lowers the stakes. Especially as this hunting trip is meant to be a rite of passage.

The high points come from the demon itself – the tentacles and the actor. The makeup for the demon was good and the actor’s presence was appropriately creepy. I enjoyed the atmosphere of the woods and the mystery it was unfolding (although it’s been played out before). Otherwise, it was…good. Mostly. It was fine.

It's a pic of a guy holding another guy with headphones, yelling, "MAH SON". A demon doesn't give a fuck and shrugs.
2.5 out of 5 stars (2.5 / 5)

THEYSUCK

Man, I wanted to like this one so much. UK NB vampires. Sounds incredible, right?

And some parts were incredible. The editing (while sometimes off, like the clothes washing scene) was stylized and crisp, as well as the cinematography. The music, when not rattling in my ears, was well-paced and energetic. Some of the scenes were clever and the locations were interesting.

The problem that bugged me the most was the writing, actually. It just…was bland. For a short about trans vampires. Like, how is that possible?

Truth be told, I think the largest reason for this was that the story didn’t really focus. It tried to be too many things all at once – friends falling out, falling in love, sexual identity, gender identity, uh…vampire identity? Looking for an apartment. Killing humans. Dancing. Dressing up like ghosts. Washing clothes dramatically.

I guess now’s the time to talk about the actual plot. Vampire Toy and their vampire roommate/romantic partner/friend (?), Novah, have a bit of a falling out. Toy is falling in love with a human! Hiss! A human realtor. Double hiss!! A human realtor cis-woman!!! Eternity amount of hisses!!!

As Toy gets more enraptured with this human, Adele, Novah figures enough is enough. Something drastic must be done. Is love enough to win the day? Or at least can Toy find their dream apartment?

Okay, so first – the names of ‘Toy’ and ‘Novah’…are so on point. I was chuckling. I mean, these are the stuff of Reddit NB memes.

It's a meme where there are two buttons - one says "have a normal name" and the other says "have the name of an inanimate object". The next scene is an NB sweating because they can't choose.

And there was a love of spit and love put into THEYSUCK, don’t get me wrong. I think the reason why I’m picking on this one so much is because of its potential. With a few tweaks and re-writes, this could have been a much stronger narrative and short film (possibly even as part of an anthology).

And I like Toy, but with the time and space we’re allotted with them, they usually end up looking sleazy with Adele or manic-pixie-dream-vamp literally dancing to their own tune. I was so looking for more vulnerability from them like in the first scene with Novah. I wanted to see that side of them. In fact, the parts with Novah and Toy were the strongest. They had good chemistry and were natural together.

The love angle with Adele and the chemistry there just felt flat and honestly…was unnecessary to Toy’s journey in their search for independence and perhaps sexual rediscovery.

All in all, I hope Lisbon Mombellet continues to make films. As I’ve said, the editing and cinematography were fun and stylish, with infectious energy. I was never bored while watching THEYSUCK and I enjoyed the parts of the whole. I think if Mombellet tightens up the writing, we’re in for some real treats in the future.

It's Toy with Adele, saying, "Hubba Hubba Happy Halloween" like a creep. And Adele is blushing and saying, "Oh! Oh! My! You're so quirky!"
3 out of 5 stars (3 / 5)

Michael and the Dragon

Oh…

My God…

Interpretive dance…horror!

Interpretivedancehorror!!! OMG!

It's a picture of Brannyk being in love and saying Yesssss

I love it.

Micky Waickman plays both Michael and the Dragon – both equally masculine and feminine in the most beautiful ways. Cait Rowe, cinematographer, pulled an utterly impressive job and took my breath away with the shots. MICHAEL AND THE DRAGON is the proof of how much an experimental piece horror with very little cast and crew can achieve with clever camerawork, ingenuity, and talent.

Shooting in black-and-white was the correct choice and I’m not just saying that because it’d probably be on the now-defunct High Art Camp, but because it added to the horror and distortion of the film. Dreamlike and nightmarish, the dance and bodywork of Waickman was itself a juxtaposition of the story it wove.

And yes, I’m showing my bias of experimental horror, but THERE IS A FINE LINE between pretentious weirdness and actual art. This one was the latter and Director/Writer Ella Price should be incredibly proud. I sincerely hope to see more of her work in the future.

4 out of 5 stars (4 / 5)

Bottomline for the Trans Steller Film Festival:

Was spending twice the amount really worth it?…

Of course! These small indie film-makers are the lifeblood of solid horror, and bigger and better things to come. I’ve said it before and I’ll say again, indie movies are precious and need to be supported. They are the babies of creators. And whether they fully hit the mark or not is irrelevant. The point is that there is creation, bridled only by lack of funds and resources. And it’s incredible to see what happens when there’s a dream that refuses to be deferred, especially by the minority of creators.

Horror is for minorities. For misfits. For the underfunded and underprivileged. Because that’s when it’s real and authentic. And horror, to be GOOD, desperately requires for it to be authentic. Maybe these won’t blow the door off anything yet. But maybe in a few years. Or maybe they’ll inspire someone else. Or maybe these directors and actors will move on to bigger things.

Yeah, yeah, I’m making it a fireside chat, but it’s true. These film festivals are the lifeblood of our community and we need to support them. I’m glad I’m an idiot and paid twice. They deserve it.

When not ravaging through the wilds of Detroit with Jellybeans the Cat, J.M. Brannyk (a.k.a. Boxhuman) reviews mostly supernatural and slasher films from the 70's-90's and is dubiously HauntedMTL's Voice of Reason. Aside from writing, Brannyk dips into the podcasts, and is the composer of many of HauntedMTL's podcast themes.

Movies n TV

“How to Split an Atom,” a Scientific Return to Evil

The assessors return to investigate a particle accelerator with a damning history in “How to Split an Atom.” Season 4 Premiere of Evil.

Published

on

The assessors return to investigate a particle accelerator with a damning history in “How to Split an Atom.” David (Mike Colter) can’t seem to shake off the dire warning of his vision. Kristen (Katja Herbers) reaches her breaking point. Ben (Aasif Mandvi) sees the light and faces some uncomfortable realizations.

“How to Split an Atom” is the first episode of season 4 of Evil, created by Michelle King and Robert King. The central cast includes Katja Herbers, Mike Colter, Aasif Mandvi, Michael Emerson, Christine Lahti, and Andrea Martin. As of this review, it’s available through Netflix and Paramount+ and its add-ons.

Four appear as the top of the image. Three look at the viewer, but the fourth on the right looks at the other three. Around them are creatures. Below all of this reads "Evil." Underneath reads "Paramount+" and finally "Season 4"
Evil Season 4 Cover

What I Like about “How to Split an Atom”

While “How to Split an Atom” does start in season 3’s conclusion, it’s still a satisfying introduction through Kristen’s reaction alone. While it’s less effective and necessary in the era of streaming services, it reminds viewers of the last season’s execution to re-establish tension. 

“How to Split an Atom” sets Kristen and Ben to face their most personal challenges. While Kristen often gets a good amount of material to explore, Ben receives the least development of the three assessors. Now that the titular scheme suggests a scientific focus, Ben seems to earn more attention.

Evil: The Final Season
  • In the final season, Kristen, David, and Ben continue to assess cases that involve wayward technology, possessed pigs, demonic oppression and infestation, a dance muse conjured by alleged witches, and an evil relic
  • Throughout, Leland attempts to lure Kristen into raising a baby antichrist who was conceived with her ovum
  • David is recruited by the Vatican’s secret service to remote view a paranormal ability to see the unseen to detect evil
Sale
Evil: The Complete Series
  • From creators Robert King and Michelle King (The Good Wife), Evil is a critically acclaimed psychological mystery series that examines the origins of evil along the dividing line between science and religion
  • A skeptical female psychologist (Katja Herbers) joins a priest-in-training (Mike Colter) and a contractor (Aasif Mandvi) as they investigate the Church’s backlog of unexplained mysteries, including supposed miracles, demonic possessions, and hauntings
  • This 13-disc collection includes all 50 episodes, along with deleted scenes and more!

Last update on 2025-03-03 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

In comparison, David takes a step back, but the performance shows a man haunted by his vision. You see this conflict in his performance as he seems more held back and reserved throughout the episode.

Though far from unique to this episode, I haven’t yet found the opportunity to dive into the opening credits. These credits embody the idea of evil as an intrusive force against the good. It visibly displays the famed “problem of evil,” showing how the darkness intrudes against the light. 

“How to Split an Atom” prepares the viewer for a new norm across every character. While that doesn’t evoke a truly haunting experience, it remains effective in building the foundation for the final season of Evil. 

White background, rubber stamp with disclaimer pressed against the white background.
Disclaimer Kimberley Web Design

Tired Tropes and Triggers

Andy (Patrick Brammall) spirals in this episode, induced by trauma and manipulation. His interactions with Kristen showcase several toxic behaviors. While these issues hold merit and other forces manipulate him, this might not matter to some.

Though not directly stated, a minor character seems to suffer a psychotic break, leading to their death. “How to Split an Atom” doesn’t confirm if this is a suicide, a demonically assisted act, or a complete accident.

A nun leans close to a man, both looking at something unseen.
Sister Andrea & Father Acosta

What I Dislike about “How to Split an Atom”

“How to Split an Atom” explores a similar titular scheme as last season, but it doesn’t resonate as well. It feels like it retreads season 3, focusing instead on science but still lingering in a similar design.

There’s a strange scene where Sister Andrea and David speak in a low whisper despite being alone in her room. If “How to Split an Atom” wants to imply that spies listen in, “How to Split an Atom” doesn’t show this idea effectively. However, I think it’s intended to parallel Catholic confession, but it still doesn’t make logical sense in execution.

As streaming shows become standard practice, starting a new season in the prior season’s conclusion makes the episode more dependent and repetitive. While the execution remains effective in “How to Split an Atom,” I can’t help but linger on that thought.

A kraken emerges from the ocean, attacking a ship. The tint suggests the image is a map icon.

Final Thoughts

“How to Split an Atom” establishes a definitive timeline where all the forces of Evil will collide. It has its strengths but doesn’t haunt the viewer. The ramifications of Ben’s descent and Kristen’s breaking point keep this episode from blending into the background, but only slightly.
3.5 out of 5 stars (3.5 / 5)

Continue Reading

Movies n TV

Goosebumps The Vanishing Ends, Damned With Faint Praise

Published

on

We’ve reached the end of Goosebumps, The Vanishing. And after eight episodes of quality going up and down, I’m sad to say that the finale held to that theme.

Cover for Goosebumps, Invasion of the Body Squeezers.

The story

We begin this episode with the teens getting ready to go down into the fort to save their dad. Dr. Pamani gave them serum injections to keep them from being turned into pods. Then she locks them in, intending to never let them out again.

Through a series of quick thinking and bravery, everyone makes it out of the fort, though. Including Matty, Nicole, Hannah and Sameer.

For a time it looks like everything is going to be alright. Until Anthony tells Jen that they’ve got to do something about the alien ship that’s still trapped within the fort.

By the way, watch this with the caption on. It’s fantastic.

Jen and Anthony go back to Dr. Pamani’s lab in time to realize that no one is safe. Least of all, their kids.

Ana Ortiz and David Schwimmer in Goosebumps The Vanishing.

What worked

You might notice that the ‘rescuing Dad from the pod’ part of this episode was over pretty fast. That’s because the actual story of this episode was about what came out of the facility rather than what was going on down there. And that was a surprising misdirect. I enjoyed that I didn’t see this misdirection coming. Well done.

I will also say that this episode was fun to watch. The critters were equal parts creepy and kind of cute. The dialog was fun and there were a lot of laughs.

This ending was also satisfying. All the questions are answered. Everyone gets a happy ending and all the people you want to get together do. It was a solid ending with no loose threads.

What didn’t work

Unfortunately, that’s all the good things I can say about this episode.

Let’s start with the continued superficiality of the whole story. I just didn’t feel much of anything for any of these characters. I had a little twinge of bittersweetness when Matty looked through the box of his old things. But that was about it.

Francesca Noel, Stony Blyden and Galilea La Salvia  in Goosebumps The Vanishing.

The problem here was that everything was going too fast. We jumped from chaos to chaos so fast that the emotions didn’t have time to sink in. It was like rain on a dry field. No matter how much falls, if it can’t be absorbed it’s not going to do much good.

Here’s the real problem I have with this episode, though.

You’ll recall that in the last episode, I was irritated by how quickly Dr. Pamani decided to help the kids. It should surprise exactly no one that she didn’t decide to help them, but to trap them in the facility to be podded forevermore.

Invasion of the Body Squeezers: Part 1 (Goosebumps Classics #41) (Classic Goosebumps)
  • Goosebumps now on Disney+!Jack Archer is convinced something strange is going on at his neighbor’s house
  • Mr
  • Fleshman always wears all black, hardly ever leaves his house, and never says hello to anyone

Last update on 2025-02-28 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

While I’m thrilled that Dr. Pamani didn’t just change her mind, I still think it was dumb as shit that anyone, especially our main characters, thought she did. These teens aren’t dumb. Kids aren’t dumb. We shouldn’t be portraying kids as dumb in a show for kids.

I’m not saying this series was pure garbage. I’m not saying it was dangerous or unwatchable. I’m just saying that, if it didn’t have the name Goosebumps, I probably never would have watched it. This story just doesn’t have the same staying power that the original stories do. It was fine to watch, but in the end, just didn’t have enough substance to warrant a rewatch.

3.5 out of 5 stars (3.5 / 5)

Continue Reading

Movies n TV

Goosebumps Sputters along with Camp Nightmare

Published

on

After a shaky start, Goosebumps The Vanishing is still on shaky ground with this penultimate episode. While there were some surprises, a lot of them were rather disappointing.

Original cover for Goosebumps Welcome To Camp Nightmare.

I feel like I say this a lot, but if you’ve read the original book then you might have a hint about where this is going. But it won’t tell you the whole story. So let’s take a trip to Camp Nightmare and see what’s waiting for us.

The story

We begin this episode with a flashback to the Fort before it was a fort. A group of Camp Nightmoon campers is hiking there with the worst camp counselor ever. It was almost a relief when the mysterious monster reached up from the cliffside and grabbed him.

Back in the present, the teens are putting the pieces together. They track down Dr. Pamani’s father and even find a book he published. They then locate the address of her lab and break in. There, they find her journals that chronicle the discovery of the monster, and how it managed to kill her entire team.

What worked

In this episode, and in fact this season, scientists are not the bad guys. Which is a relief. Science fiction and horror tend to hold up a mirror to society, showing us what we’re really scared of using monsters and ghosts as allegories. So often, when people are wary of science and scientists, we have horror movies that demonize them.

Sahana Srinivasan in Goosebumps The Vanishing.

But that’s not what happened here. The scientists are not necessarily the good guys, but the ones who tried to save the world. Even though they failed, they tried.

One good example of this was Dr. Pamani telling her father, “We’re scientists, not soldiers.” This is a great line. And this episode had a lot of great lines. The dialog was on point. Nothing felt forced, but it also felt polished and impactful. It was just overall well done.

I also enjoyed, to a point, the flashback scenes to 1969. It was interesting to see the people who tried to contain this entity. To learn from it. The flashback was also ominous. Because never did the characters explain how this entity got there. They didn’t seem interested in that, only in how to destroy it. Since we don’t know why or how it came to New York, we don’t know if there are more of them somewhere else. And since everyone’s being so secretive, we might never know.

Until it’s too late.

What didn’t work

Unfortunately, this episode failed more than it succeeded.

Let’s start with the sudden change of heart Dr. Pamani has. For decades, she’s been controlling and containing this creature. She’s been careful to never take risks that might release it into the world. So when Cece and Devin want to go save their dad, she says no.

At first. Then, after a not-so-passionate plea by Cece, she changes her mind and agrees to help them save Anthony.

Which seems like a really quick departure from her stance just moments before. Honestly, this wasn’t believable at all. It was lazy. It felt like they just didn’t have a good enough reason for her to change her mind, so they just handwaved it away.

This wasn’t the only part of the story that was too easy. This whole investigation went smoothly for them. They wanted to find the book by Dr. Avi Pamani, and they found it at the library. They didn’t even find it. The librarian found it for them. They wanted to find Dr. Pamani’s address. They found it in seconds and also found her credit score. They got into her lab by doing nothing more than cutting a chain holding the door shut. And we’re supposed to believe that no one ever thought to do any of this? Four teenagers vanished in the 1990s, and none of their family members were ever able to put all this together. That just doesn’t make sense to me.

Jayden Bartels, Francesca Noel and Elijah M. Cooper in Goosebumps The Vanishing.

Both of these issues feed into the main problem with this episode. The whole thing felt watered way down. Especially after the hints about some horrific medical experiments taking place at the fort. I love a good horrific medical experiment story, so I was looking forward to that.

But that’s not what happened. Instead, it was a watered-down alien invasion story with a bunch of people who did their best and failed. It just felt like, frankly, not enough. It felt like there could have been so much more, should have been so much more. Instead, we got the Great Value version of what we could have had.

At this point, I think I’m too invested to give up. After all, there’s just one more episode left. But I’d be lying if I said that was something I’m looking forward to.

3 out of 5 stars (3 / 5)

Continue Reading

Trending