Cell VS. Cell
Cell is that Stephen King book and movie that everyone forgets is a Stephen King book and movie. It might be because when you think of Stephen King you don’t usually think of zombies, and when I think of Cell I don’t necessarily think of zombies either. Whether or not Cell is really part of the zombie horror genre, I leave that up to you the reader to decide.
Cell – A Book
Clayton Riddell is an unassuming graphic artist who’s on his way home from Boston after landing the deal of a lifetime to publish his own graphic novel. Unfortunately for him, this is the day that “The Pulse” happens. The Pulse is an entirely phone based event where anyone who’s on their phone at around 3 in the afternoon on October 1st sometime in the mid-2000s gets their mind wiped causing them to suddenly and violently go crazy. Mass murder and mass panic ensues. As hysteria reins and people try to call for help more get hit by the Pulse and the Apocalypse begins.
Clay, who’s cell phoneless, avoids the Pulse, but from his vantage point on a random Boston street corner, things go downhill fast as “phone crazies” attack and kill people all around him. During the initial chaos Clay manages to save a gay guy named Tom McCourt, who joins him for the rest of the book for lack of anything better to do. Eventually they also pick up a traumatized 14 year old girl named Alice.
Fleeing Boston as it burns, our mains become refugees in the cell phone Apocalypse. Clay’s main objective is trying to get home to his wife and son Johnny G (they must have been really big fans of Kenny G is all I can think), Tom really wants to check on his cat, and Alice is mostly just coming along with them since she had to kill the only family she had apparently. They meet other “normies”, none Pulse affected people, along the road, and it is a very long road. There might be more walking in this book than in the whole ten seasons of The Walking Dead combined.
The phone crazies aren’t your typical “brainssssss” zombies. They might bite and stab, but they’re not after your juicy human meats. After the initial homicidal panic from the Pulse, they quickly start to change and evolve into something entirely different. You learn how all this happens from a 12 year old character in the book named Jordan, who apparently can figure all this out because he knows computer basics. As the phone crazies go from individual threats to a hive mind, Clay and his band become targets of the phone crazies new world order.
Thoughts – An effort was made
This book, more than anything else, feels downright frustrating. From the big flashing TECHNOLOGY BAD sign throughout it, to the one note characters, to the lack of clarity into just how the Pulse happened, and the halting pace of the entire book where things start to pick up only to slow down again to mourn for characters that you don’t really care about all that much about. Clay is not a very interesting main character to spend an entire book with. His one and only concern is to get home to his wife and son; no thoughts for other family, friends, coworkers or the greater effect the events that are unfolding around them are going to have on the future. As eager as Clay is to get home though, there are so many detours that slow the whole book down that at times it seems like the book is trying to replicate a phoner in reboot mode. As much as the book tries to push the found family trope it falls flat in that effort too. Despite spending time getting to know random characters, the fact remains that these were people Clay met only a hour to a day or two ago, so any real connection between the characters is somewhat lost.
The beginning of the apocalypse here, which takes at least 100 pages, could be the same as any typical zombie or plague movie or book (think World War Z on a local level only with the most average guy ever instead of Brad Pitt). It’s not until the phoners start changing to something other than mindless zombies that things really get interesting. The characters actually start to have some doubts and moral dilemmas about the mass killing of beings that used to be human, but may not be any longer. The problem is, things also get so convoluted and motivations of the phoner hive mind remain so dim that the big climax and the ending of the book feels supremely unsatisfying as a whole.
The book may hold more disappointment for me than enjoyment, but it’s not the worst book I’ve ever read, nor even the worst Stephen King book, but it’s still not ranked anywhere near the top of my Stephen King must read list.
Cell – A Movie
This may be a rare instance where a movie is actually better than the book it was based off of. Perhaps it’s because the movie trims all the unnecessary fat and characters from the book to fit it into its hour and a half running time, but the entire premise seems to work better as a movie. The screenplay is still written by Stephen King and Adam Alleca, and the plot is basically the same as the book, with a few key differences.
Clay in the movie is played by the ever pleasant and sad eyed John Cusack, who brings a real feeling of humanity to the character of Clay that was lacking in the book. Clay’s still a graphic artist on his way home to his estranged wife and son, only now the phone Apocalypse starts for him in a Boston airport, which is a much more exciting start than a random street corner.
Escaping the chaos at the airport for the subway, Clay runs into the movie version of Tom, played by Samuel L. Jackson, who bears pretty much no resemblance to Tom from the book. Movie Tom is now a subway driving, Vietnam vet, devoice who, like Clay, is caught up in everything going on. To the movie’s credit, there is a throwaway line that Tom is still gay, even if it’s blink and you’ll miss it. Tom has Clay’s down to earth attitude about the end of the world and it’s easy to understand why they might stick together this time around. They also find their own traumatized Alice Maxwell, played by Isabelle Fuhrman.
Perhaps the biggest change from the book to the film is the sense of solitude the survivors experience while heading north. Wide shots of isolated cell phone towers in nature add to the feeling, and the low budget independent film look of the movie makes for some realism in a way that World War Z or the Dawn of the Dead remake lacks. When the leads do run into other normies, instead of the stereotypical Stephen King crazy religious ladies or redneck yokels from the book, you get some likeable average Joe type people who are willing to help Clay’s crew out. Even character deaths of one-off characters in the movie seem to hold more weight than they do in the book.
The phone crazies powers are trimmed down from the book as well, and at the same time become much scarier when they start admitting the Pulse (which sounds a lot like an AOL dial-up tone) from their mouths in order to infect remaining normies. At that point it becomes a survival of the fittest species type movie.
After King changed the ending for the movie from the book because of criticism of the book ending, the movie ending is still just as confusing. While the book’s ending is a bit more on the hopeful side, in general I still preferred the new movie ending to the book ending.
But seriously, don’t ask me what’s going on here cause I haven’t got a clue.
Final Girl Thoughts
If you’re the type of person who needs every plot point explained in great detail, this is definitely not the book or the movie for you. If you like your apocalypses more on the confusing side, then you might enjoy Cell. There’s some of the typical Stephen King unusualness that happens, the shadowy figure haunting the mains every step (this time called the Raggedy Man or the President of Harvard or the President of the Internet, whichever you prefer) and characters having psychological breakdowns on the regular. Cell, both the movie and the book, definitely have that Stephen King mark on them, though they perhaps lack the deeper themes that make for a real Stephen King classic. My recommendation, watch the movie for free on Tubi and skip the book entirely.
(3 / 5)
Book Reviews
What Feasts at Night: An amble through Romanian folklore.
“Salt on the floor, threads on the walls, and iron under the pillow.”
Sword Soldier 2: What Feasts at Night, a review.
Published in February 2024, What Feasts at Night is the second book in T. Kingfisher’s Sworn Soldier duology. If you’re curious, you can find my review of the first installment, What Moves the Dead – a chilling reimagining of Poe’s The Fall of the House of Usher – here.
What Feasts at Night into Romanian folklore, weaving a tale that grapples with PTSD and the enduring impact of trauma, or what our main character calls ‘soldier’s heart’.
The Plot.
In What Feasts at Night, Alex Easton returns from his unsettling encounter with the Ushers and sets his sights on a quiet retreat to his Galacian cottage. Accompanied by his loyal companion, Angus, and his faithful steed Hob, he arrives to find the caretaker mysteriously deceased and the local villagers shrouded in fear and silence. Undeterred, Alex presses on, enlisting the aid of the superstitious Widow Botezatu to prepare his home for the arrival of his friend, Eugenia Potter.
As the story moves forward, the tranquility of the cottage is disrupted, and a sinister presence begins to cast its shadow. The Widow Botezatu’s son, Bors, begins to exhibit the same disturbing symptoms that the deceased caretakers suffered through. According to his mother, these symptoms align with the terrifying legend of the moroi.
Highlights.
Including the traditional Romanian folklore was a real highlight of this story. This is not limited to the presence of the shape-shifting, nocturnal moroi. Kingfisher has also included various superstitions from this region believed to ward off evil, such as weaving red thread and placing knives beneath pillows.
As a sworn soldier, Alex Easton has played his part in many wars. Kingfisher mentioned ‘soldier’s heart’ briefly in What Moves the Dead, in this installation we are able to see how this trauma response affects Alex. There is a beautiful insight into trauma that should not be left out of any review of this book.
“I sometimes think the fundamental disconnect with civilians is that they think the war is an event, something neatly bound on either end by dates. What anyone who’s lived through one can tell you is it’s actually a place. You’re there and then you leave, but places don’t stop existing just because you aren’t looking at them. The war’s still there. I don’t live in it anymore, but it’s right over there, just on the other side of… I don’t know.” (87)
Drawbacks.
In comparison with the first installment of this series, What Feasts at Night lacked peaks and troughs, feeling like a slow and steady amble to the final scenes. Although Kingfisher manages to pack her pages with atmosphere and a sense of foreboding, there is a lack of solid action here until the last few pages of the story. For those who enjoy a slow burn, this will not necessarily be a drawback, but I have grown to expect a certain level of movement from Kingfisher’s stories and found it was missing here.
The Final Take.
My love of T Kingfisher is no secret. I find her stories engaging, atmospheric and generally a little brain bending. However, What Feasts in the Night is perhaps my least favourite of those I have read. The plot was a little slow and the characters lack luster. I did still enjoy this story, in particular Kingfishers take on PTSD. I cannot say that this is an original idea but traumatic experience as a place rather than a time period is one that really makes sense to me.
There are whispers that suggest this series might grow into a trilogy next year. I, for one, am looking forward to seeing what kind of trouble Alex Easton gets into next.
(3 / 5)
Book Reviews
What Moves the Dead gives depth to Poe’s most famous tale.
“The dead don’t walk. Except, sometimes, when they do.”
The first of T. Kingfisher’s Sworn Soldier duology, What Moves the Dead was published in July 2022. Shortly after the novella won the 2023 Locus Award for Best Horror Novel and was nominated for the 2023 Hugo Award for Best Novella, this story is Kingfisher’s version of Edgar Allan Poe’s ‘The Fall of the House of Usher’. It offers depth and insight into the original characters and plot of Poe’s short story.
The Plot.
What Moves the Dead is a modern reimagining of Edgar Allan Poe’s classic tale, “The Fall of the House of Usher.”
The story follows Alex Easton, a sworn soldier who receives a disturbing letter from the sister of his childhood friend. Summoned to the isolated Usher mansion, Alex finds the once-grand house in a state of decay. This mirrors the deteriorating health of its inhabitants, Roderick and his twin sister, Madeline.
As Alex delves deeper into the unsettling atmosphere of the mansion, he encounters a series of inexplicable occurrences. Strange noises echo through the halls, eerie lights flicker in the darkness, and wildlife in the surrounding environment does not act as it should. As Madeline’s condition worsens, Alex begins to question the nature of the mysterious illness afflicting the family. Is it a physical malady, or something far more sinister?
Highlights.
Although What Moves the Dead follows the same storyline as ‘The Fall of the House of Usher’, Kingfisher’s version has the advantage of length. As she says in her author’s note, Poe’s story is just too short. Kingfisher names previously unnamed characters and provides them with more complete personalities. We get dialogue from Madeline and the doctor which offers answers and reasoning for the mysterious illness that the Usher twins are suffering from.
What Moves the Dead also provides a much more thorough description of the house and the surrounding natural environment. This becomes important in the identification of the Usher’s illness. We are also gifted an extra character, one Miss Potter, who definitively identifies herself as the aunt of the great Beatrix Potter who was known to be interested in mycology- the study of fungi.
Drawbacks.
In Kingfisher’s fictional country,Ruritania, the local language uses over 7 pronouns (ta, tha, than, var, ka, kan, va, van). Some of these are used only for sworn soldiers, others as a gender-neutral way to refer to children. A lot of time is spent explaining these and the reasoning behind each. I enjoyed reading this, but then was disappointed when none of these pronouns were really used in the book itself. The time that Kingfisher spent setting this up, I thought it would be a larger part of the story, but it had no bearing on the story at all.
The Final Take.
Is it wrong to consider a retelling or adaptation superior to a classic? I don’t have an answer for that. However, Kingfisher had gone above and beyond Poe’s original story, providing depth and insight where Poe only left questions. I will never eat mushrooms (in particular the long thready Enoki mushroom) again with complete peace of mind. I look forward to reviewing the second book in this series, What Feasts at Night.
(4 / 5)
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