Notes from the Last Drive-In: Heartbreak Trailer Park
We’re going to Joe Bob’s Heartbreak Trailer Park for a celebration of love… of a kind! Welcome to Haunted MTL’s “Notes from the Last Drive-in,” where we cover the fun of Shudder’s best series featuring the venerable Joe Bob Briggs. In a special Valentine’s Day event, we feel the love as Joe Bob welcomes special guests to the trailer, including The Boulet Brothers from Shudder’s Dragula, as well as Drive-In legends Frank Henenlotter and James Lorinz.
So, the question is, did viewers feel the love during Joe Bob’s Heartbreak Trailer Park? Did the night’s films, Black Roses (1988) and Frankenhooker (1990), leave the fans fulfilled?
Let’s find out.
Black Roses (1988)
Black Roses is a 1988 metalsploitation horror film directed by John Fasano. The movie stars John Martin, Ken Swafford, Julie Adams, and Carla Ferrigno. It also features an impressive soundtrack of metal, including Tempest, Lizzy Borden, and King Kobra. The members of King Kobra would make up the Black Roses in the film.
The film follows a teacher at a high school (Martin) who grows concerned about the effect a band, Black Roses, is having on normally straight-laced students in the town of Mill Basin. The town’s parents express concern, but the demonic frontman of the band tricks them as he pulls more of the local children under his thrall.
The story isn’t great. This Satanic Panic metal film plays on the anxieties of the censorship crowd by presenting a movie that makes the case that maybe metal does push kids to bad behavior. The film is a satire, but the film doesn’t quite hit the satirical note to be very effective. Broadly, I found myself wishing the film were a little more extreme in its depictions of chaos. The town under Satanic influence seems localized to a block or two, and most of the bad behavior is pretty minor in the grand scheme of things. The film would have been stronger if it had given into excess as the titular band urges.
The performances are nothing to write home about either. John Martin as Matthew Moorhouse, the teacher, is good given what he has to work with. But really, the most memorable thing about the cast I recall is a brief appearance by Vincent Pastore, “Big Pussy” himself, screaming as he gets eaten by a monster spawned from a record. Not even screen-horror-legend Julie Adams does much here, playing a social crusader who doesn’t get a lot to work within the film’s scope.
Visually, this film doesn’t offer much beyond a handful of fun creature effects. The framing is primarily flat and budget-friendly, much like the Canadian tax shelter used by the production. I wasn’t overly impressed with how the film looked. With that said, the creature effects were a lot of fun, as practical effects usually are. It just feels so small-scale and feels like a direct-to-video affair, which it was.
The real appeal of the film comes from the music. Bang Tango, Lizzy Bordon, Hallow’s Eve, and Tempest are among the bands who contributed to the soundtrack. As for the fictional Black Roses, the band comprises actual metal performers, most notably Carmine Appice of Cactus, King Kobra, and Blue Murder.
Though, from the director of the MST3K staple Zombie Nightmare, I expected a bit more of this movie. Especially given it is a favorite of the Boulet Brothers, the first guests of the evening.
Joe Bob-servations on Black Roses
Our venerable host Joe Bob Briggs was joined at the “Heartbreak Trailer Park” by the Boulet Brothers of Dragula fame. Overall, the guests and the host were affable and played well off one another, with Joe Bob asking about the world of horror drag and the Boulets’ party scene between dispensing information about the film. It is an example of shrewd calculation of Shudder’s part to take two popular shows and generate some crossover viewership. Still, it is ultimately fun, and there is no shame in that at all, especially with how fantastic the Boulet Brothers are as guests.
The Boulets offer a fun way to introduce a little glamour and filth onto The Last Drive-In, and as a whole, the Valentine’s Day angle worked well enough. It helps that Swanthula and Dracmorda Boulet are generally game and quick on their feet. Their story about the “teacup incident” is one of the grosser things presented on the show in the first half of the evening.
It wasn’t just Dragula getting a nod in the show during the night, either. Another Shudder original Creepshow has a connection to Black Roses in that one of the Creepshow writers, Frank Dietz, played the evil frontman of the band in the movie. Probably one of the most interesting Joe Bob factoids in the first half of the evening.
Final Thoughts on Black Roses
Black Roses is generally fun as a direct-to-video oddity, but it is ultimately too toothless to be satire and too tame to be a drive-in masterpiece. Joe Bob Briggs gave Black Roses 3 stars, but I think it was given a bump given it was a guest selection.
I can’t see myself giving Black Roses anything greater than 2-and-a-half Cthulhus. I had fun, but I think it was more because it was on The Last Drive-In rather than the merits of the movie itself. The real appeal of the film comes from the metal soundtrack.
(2.5 / 5)
Best Line: “I’m going home… Or maybe to a bar, yeah, whichever I pass first.” – Matt, speaking for all teachers, everywhere.
Frankenhooker (1990)
Now 1990’s Frankenhooker is what I expect from The Last Drive-In and is a perfect Valentine’s Day movie for the “Heartbreak Trailer Park.” Frankenhooker is a black comedy horror film directed by Drive-In legend Frank Henenlotter. The movie stars James Lorinz and Patty Mullen, a former Penthouse Pet.
The film follows the ambitious experiments of a power plant worker and medical school drop-out, Jeffrey Franken, who seeks to revive his fiance, who died in a tragically avoidable accident. Only he also plans on making a few upgrades, pulling him into the shady world of sex workers on the streets of New York to build his bride.
The film is a hilarious play on the classic Frankenstein story and offers incredibly dark comedy. Exploding bodies, piles of human limbs and breasts, self-regulating through a power drill in the head. The film is like a pitch-black cartoon and carries the same ridiculously fun energy of Frank Henenlotter’s other Drive-In classics like Brain Damage and Basket Case. Frankenhooker is, ironically enough, Henenlotter’s most mainstream film of his 80s and 90s output, but even then, it still revels in excess in the best way possible.
A lot of this film boils down to the performances of Lorinz and Mullen, and they each absolutely sell the hell out of this movie in their wildly different purposes. Lorinz carries the film as Jeffrey, a slightly amoral scientist who jump-starts his thought process via a power-tool lobotomy. Lorinz plays Jeffrey as sympathetic and worthy of scorn within the same scenes. While I am sure another actor could have delivered on Jeffrey, I can’t think of any. Lorinz owns the role.
Mullen, however, has a much smaller part in the film. Her character dies nearly immediately, and she does not get revived until the third act, where Mullen shines in this brief time as the undead streetwalker with a heart of gold who shouts “Wanna date?” and “Got any money?” to confused onlookers. Mullen plays this up wonderfully, and it’s no wonder that her delivery has become an iconic part of why this film is beloved among drive-in mutants.
The film looks pretty great, shooting on location for New York’s scenes, while the suburban setting of Jeffrey’s neighborhood and garage evoke a strange sense of whimsy I feel is akin to Edward Scissorhands. That being said, Frankenhooker is nowhere near as wholesome as that film – it is funnier, though. Regardless, cinematographer Robert M. Baldwin did well in shooting these two worlds. After all, there is a world of difference between New Jersey and New York.
Frankenhooker is one of those films that works as a thesis statement for The Last Drive-In. If it were in that inaugural marathon back when we thought this would be Joe Bob’s last rodeo nearly four years ago, this film would have been the highlight. It has blood, breasts, and beasts, features a drive-in legend is Joe Bob’s friend, Henenlotter, and is funny as hell.
Joe Bob-servations on Frankenhooker
Frankenhooker is dearly a beloved film by both Joe Bob and Darcy, and there was a much more enthusiastic feeling around it than Black Roses. Drive-In Mutants, in general, love the film. The only way to make a showing of Frankenhooker better is to bring on the man himself, Frank Henenlotter, to talk about it. He not only brought his memories but a prop breast for the show and even managed to bring James Lorinz with him.
Hearing Joe Bob and Frank talk as friends and movie fans proved incredibly compelling. Mainly because they took the time to find their little indulgences, such as a discussion of Herschell Gordon Lewis. Hearing all three of the men discuss various interpretations and trivia about the movie was also entertaining as Frank can sometimes be a bit cantankerous in a funny way. Really though, Frank Henenlotter knows how to control the room.
Maybe one of the best bits of the night was the discussion of Robert “Uncle Bob” Martin, co-writer of Frankenhooker, who first met Henenlotter while working on a novelization of Brain Damage. Martin would be an essential figure to horror, as he was the original editor of Fangoria. Horror is often the domain of outsiders who find one another, and hearing these stories shows how tightly knit this community can be.
Final Thoughts on Frankenhooker
Every once in a while, The Last Drive-In plays a movie that can easily be declared the ultimate Drive-In movie. This time it is Frankenhooker. The film delivers on the promise of The Last Drive-In as a concept and evokes so many fun associations in drive-in movie history.
Frankenhooker makes the Heartbreak Trailer Park. Joe Bob gave Frankenhooker 4 well-deserved stars, a grade he would have given even if his friend Frank wasn’t on set. I am in agreement with our host on this one. Frankenhooker is a 5 Cthulhu film.
(5 / 5)
Best Line: “Yeah – Well so am I, Ma. Something’s happening to me that I just don’t understand. I can’t think straight anymore. It’s like my reasoning is all, uh, twisted and distorted, you know? I seem to be disassociating myself from reality more and more each day. I’m anti-social. I’m becoming dangerously amoral. I – I’ve lost the ability to distinguish between right from wrong, good from bad. I’m scared, Ma. I mean, I feel like I’m – I’m plunging headfirst into some kind of black void of sheer and utter madness or something.” – Jeffrey, knowing himself.
Haunted MTL Drive-In Totals
As usual, we have the totals direct from the show. Thanks, Shudder!
As for the Haunted MTL Drive-In Totals, we have…
- 2 Darcy Cosplay
- 4 Guests
- 40 years of praise for Frankenhooker
- 97 million women buying potpourri
- 196 Million Roses on Valentine’s Day
- Gratuitious Big Pussy
- Grautitous Drag, Filth, Horror, and Glamor
- Gratuitous Musical Performances
- Topless Monster
- Bodyless Tops
- Brain Drilling
- Sex Club Joking
- United Way Joking
- Teacup Storytelling Fu
- Karaoke Fu
- Poetry Fu
- Overly Involved Teacher Fu
Joe Bob’s Heartbreak Trailer Park Episode Score
Overall, this was a solid special for Valentine’s Day. Both sets of guests were very entertaining. Each group of guests provided a different kind of compliment to their respective movie. The Boulet Brothers were able to share a film they loved that maybe wasn’t my favorite of the evening, still had a level of camp, and made for a fun evening. Likewise, Frank Henenlotter and Frank Lorinz gave us the Valentine’s Day gift of a love letter to drive-in movie culture.
Throw in a couple of Darcy cosplays, karaoke interludes, prop limbs, and one shocking story about a teacup you have for a pretty memorable Valentine’s Day.
Don’t you just feel the love? I give “Joe Bob’s Heartbreak Trailer Park” 4 Cthulhus.
(4 / 5)
And with that, Notes from The Last Drive-In takes a break until the next special or seasons of The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs – whichever comes first. We’ll keep an eye out for the return of Joe Bob and Darcy on Shudder this year. We will continue to cover the show as it continues to air new episodes and specials.
Please let us know what you think of the review and recap. We would love to read your comments about the films as well. Please let us know what you think.
Until next time, Mutants.
Want to Buy the films mentioned in the review?
Episode three of Amazon Prime’s Fallout continued the themes we’ve seen so far, with an added twist. With comedy and gore already blending, the story has added an air of tragic history for one of its least cuddly characters.
Let’s discuss.
The story
Our story starts with a flashback to before the bombs dropped. We see Coop, filming a movie. His wife is on set as well, and their adorable daughter. Coop has a comfortable life with a family he loves.
Isn’t that just a knife in the heart?
Back in the present, Lucy is traveling through the wastelands with the head of Wilzig. And she’s doing so with the same fear and joy that we’ve seen from her so far. Until that is, she runs into a Gulper. And after eating a defenseless deer, it swallowed up the head.
Eventually, The Ghoul catches up with Lucy and decides to capture her. After using her as bait, he decides to drag her along with him.
Meanwhile, Maximus gets a message from the Brotherhood of Steel. Rather than coming clean, he claims to be Knight Titus and is accidentally sent a new Squire. That squire is Thaddeus, one of Maximus’s bullies from the base. And Maximus wastes no time in taking some sweet, sweet revenge.
Finally, we return to Vault 33. The vault is healing from the Raider attack and the loss of Lucy. Norm and Chet are being punished for letting Lucy leave, by being fired from their jobs. This throws Chet because he had a cool job.
Norm, on the other hand, didn’t like his job. He didn’t like any job. So, since this is the only way anyone gets punishments in the vault, he’s given the task of feeding the Raiders.
And talking to the Raiders was maybe not a healthy thing for Norm to be doing. He might learn something he didn’t want to know.
What worked
The first thing I have to talk about is the massive creature called The Gulper.
This thing was fascinating. It was voracious, fast, and horrifying to look like. It was like a giant axolotl from Hell, with human fingers lining its whole mouth and throat. Why did it need fingers lining its mouth and throat? The better to drag someone down its throat and into its stomach. And the better to drag itself into my nightmares. This creature was well done.
On the flip side of this, I love the fact that the people of Vault 33 are so kind. They’re so willing to forgive, willing to care for their fellow man even when their fellow man is trying to kill them.
I don’t trust it, to be clear. But the perceived kindness from these people is uplifting. And I’m sure it will make whatever is going to eventually happen to them all the worse.
Of course, I can’t talk about the goodness of the vault dwellers without talking about the absolute horribleness of The Ghoul. The Ghoul is not a good person. He is cruel, and selfish, and clearly dislikes Lucy for some reason we do not yet know, and is probably not her fault.
But we kind of understand how he got that way, don’t we? During the flashbacks, we see that he’s lost his wife and daughter. We also see that he was used as a mascot for the very company that created the vaults. And, while we don’t have any concrete proof yet, we can probably guess that these are not the good guys. Even if we haven’t played the games, anyone who’s even slightly genre-savvy can already guess that.
Which is the last thing I want to bring up here.
We know something stinks with the vaults. Something beyond the obvious issues of wealth disparities and the people left outside to die while those who could afford a Vault spot were saved. Something is rotten with the vaults, we all know this. What we don’t know is what form this rot will take.
Not yet.
What didn’t work
Now, I wish I could say this was a perfect episode. But sadly, it wasn’t. And my biggest issue with the episode is with the character Maximus.
Now, I love Maximus. He wants to do good things in the world. He’s the underdog, and who doesn’t love that? He’s honorable and believes in the organization he belongs to.
I don’t love that he cannot do anything right. It feels like he wins fights by falling over and tripping into succeeding. And this character deserves so much more than that. Can we please, just once, see him be good at something or make a sound decision?
All that being said, this was still a fun episode. It was funny and bright, with an ominous feel and a horrific finger-ridden monster. I had a great time with it.
(4 / 5)
Last night’s episode of American Horror Story Delicate was wild. From its star-studded start to its powerfully quiet finish, I was enthralled through every moment.
Let’s discuss.
The story
We begin this episode at the funeral of Dex’s mom. While he’s giving a eulogy, which was very nice, Ms. Preecher walks in. She shouts to the room that Virginia didn’t commit suicide, she was murdered. She also tells Dex to listen to his wife.
What a concept!
Touched by this, or maybe just curious, Anna goes to the hospital to check on Preecher. She falls asleep at the hospital. When she wakes up, Preecher is gone. A nurse says that she was discharged to a group of women.
While at the hospital, Anna also discovers that she’s been nominated for best actress.
At a publicity event for the awards, Anna runs into Cora. And she sees the coat she remembers from her late-night visit near the start of her pregnancy.
With the slightest amount of pressure, Cora spills it all. She and Dex have been having an affair, and Cora was trying to sabotage Anna’s pregnancy. So Anna, channeling her inner Madison Montgomery, kicks him out and heads to the awards ceremony with Siobhan.
There, Siobhan asks her if she wants an Oscar more than anything. If she’d be willing to give up anything for it.
And Anna says yes.
The bargain is then sealed with a kiss.
What worked
I’d like to begin, paradoxically, at the end of the episode. We’ve seen Anna have some terrible, loud, frightening hallucinations in this season. At least, we assume they’re hallucinations. But this one wasn’t loud. It was, in fact, very quiet. Anna is led off stage, without a word, leaving nothing but a puddle of blood behind.
In horror, like in all art, the notes you don’t play are as important as the ones you do. And the notes that weren’t played her rang like a bell.
I also appreciated that this episode describes why being a celebrity would be a huge pain in the ass. Imagine going to an event where the whole purpose is for people to take pictures of you while holding their product. Imagine if they invaded your personal space, sprayed things on you, put things over your eyes, and you were expected to smile and pose.
I don’t know what it is about being a celebrity that makes others feel entitled to a person. To talk with them, take their time, and share in their moments. To touch them without consent. Yes, there are way worse things happening to people. But this isn’t a great way to live. It’s no wonder so many of them go nuts. This is most clearly shown in the scene when Anna is sitting next to Preecher’s bed. She wakes up to find the older woman gone. But all anyone wants to talk about is how she was just nominated for an Oscar. At that moment, she doesn’t give a damn. She cares about this kind woman, and where she’s gone. Just like any other person.
Finally, I appreciated that this season didn’t do what so many AHS seasons do. Which is to say that this episode didn’t feel like the last episode. It felt like the penultimate episode. It felt like there was still more story to tell, not just loose ends to be wrapped up. I appreciate that the writers have finally learned that lesson.
For this season, at least.
What didn’t work
The first thing that bothered me in this episode was Cora’s confession. I said something about this during our live-watch event on Threads. (Join us next week for the finale. Bring popcorn and wine.)
I don’t believe Cora’s confession. I further don’t believe that she just dumped all of this incriminating info on Anna with no more prompting than a wide-eyed look. There was just no reason for it. So, Anna saw her coat? Lots of people have similar coats. This feels fake, and she brought no receipts.
I also found Siobhan’s behavior confusing. At times she seems genuinely concerned for Anna’s wellbeing. At other times, she is more than willing to let her suffer and risk her pregnancy.
While this has been going on all season, it was happening every few minutes in this one. Either Siobhan cares about the welfare of that fetus, or she doesn’t. But she needs to pick a lane.
All in all, I don’t know what to expect from next week’s season finale. Anna has her Oscar, but now she might lose her baby. She might also get sucked into some horrible cult and experience a bad death. We won’t know until next week.
See you then.
(4 / 5)
Episode two of Amazon Prime’s Fallout was equal parts funny and bloody. This almost always leads to a good time.
The story
We begin this episode with the birth of some puppies that look like they’ve had a rough start to life. Each one is weighed, with the ones who fall short being incinerated.
One pup who is just below the correct weight gets a bit of a thumb on their scale. The scientist weighing them, Wilzig, writes down the proper weight. He later takes the puppy home to raise instead of putting them into what looks like an unforgiving training program.
Eventually, we see Wilzig put some blue glowing thing into his neck. When a soldier comes for him, Dog attacks the soldier, and the two escape.
We go from there to the wilderness, where Lucy is recovering from the last episode and enjoying a campfire at night. Wilzig and Dog come out of the shadows, saving Lucy from a bug monster. Wilzig tells Lucy she should go home. And if she’s not going to go home, she needs to evolve.
The next day Lucy finds her way to a town called Filly. As a Pennsylvanian, it hurts me to spell it that way. Lucy is entranced by this town, though clearly put off by the fact that no one is very nice here.
She eventually finds her way to a shop run by a delightful woman named Ma June. Ma doesn’t seem particularly interested in helping Lucy. Or, frankly, having Lucy in her shop.
Or in her town.
Eventually, Wilzig is tracked to this same shop, being tracked by The Ghoul. This is our final primary character. Lucy defends Wilzig, being aided at the last moment by Maximus.
Maximus, by the way, has been having a terrible time. After finally becoming a squire he’s disappointed to find that his knight, Knight Titus, is a terrible person.
Fortunately, Maximus doesn’t have to put up with Titus for long. After Titus gets the bright idea to go hunting, he’s attacked by a mutated bear. Maximus freezes, unable to save him. Then, well, he decides not to save him.
It was Titus’s idea to go hunt the bear, after all.
What worked
The first thing I want to draw attention to is the shootout scene at Filly. This scene checked every box a fight scene should check. It was fun to watch, with great effects. But it also gave us insight into the characters. Lucy is a decent fighter and has a strong moral compass. The Ghoul is callus and desensitized to death. And Maximus continues to be, well, sort of bad at this whole fighting thing. But with enough moral fortitude that we have a hard time blaming him.
Of course, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the dog. Who’s name, as far as I’ve been able to ascertain, is just Dog. Which is fine. He doesn’t need to have a name to be a very good boy. He’s sweet, loyal, and fearless.
Also, puppies. Puppies are always great.
Finally, I’d like to shine a spotlight on Lucy’s reaction to the world at large. She is both amazed and terrified by everything. And while she certainly doesn’t want to be rude, she also doesn’t want to be taken advantage of. The best example of this is when she stops to ask for directions with a bright smile and a gun.
Once again, I don’t have anything bad to say about this episode. It was funny, dark, and fun to watch. I’m very much looking forward to the rest of the season.
(4 / 5)
