Notes from The Last Drive-In: S2E6
It was an evening of chills, spills, and colonial ills for the sixth episode of The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs. What a night. We had two divisive features: Dead Heat and Cannibal Holocaust. I think we can all agree that maybe there was a little too much Piscopo. That and filmed animal deaths are pretty terrible.
So, lets dive in, shall we?
Dead Heat (1988)
Opening Rant: Can one loiter in a Starbucks?
We all know how this goes, two cops are investigating a conspiracy, one cop dies in the line for fire, and then is revived as a zombie to continue his work with his smart-aleck partner. Welcome to Dead Heat: It’s like Lethal Weapon meets My Boyfriend’s Back. The first movie tonight was kind of a light, airy aperitif to Cannibal Holocaust‘s main course. Dead Heat was goofy, overproduced, but still pretty fun.
The movie is an interesting product of late 1980s Hollywood trying to ape the spirit of the kind of trash coming from low-budget indie projects. The elements are all there but not handled appropriately. The film feels like a Troma release with too much money and lazy execution. There is stuff in this movie to love, though, and even a more scaled-down one or two films buried in this overly-plotted mess of the movie.
It’s strange that what should be a momentous occasion, the presence of Darren McGavin and Vincent Price in the same movie, does not really wow as it should. That’s kind of the movie as a whole: it should be way better than it is. Less time spent on Joe Piscopo one-liners and an amusing but ultimately pointless reanimated Chinese butcher shop inventory and Dead Heat could have been really good.
That being said, Treat Williams hurling himself off a motorcycle through a glass door, guns-blazing was certainly worth the watch. The film is fun, but that is about it.
Joe Bob’s assessment of Dead Heat is pretty middle of the road for a film on The Last Drive-In, coming in at two and a half stars. Of course, our host had a lot to say about the film and a lot of it was interesting, but it also felt like Joe Bob just wasn’t feeling it. This might be the most ambivalent he has ever been on a movie since his debut on Shudder. Perhaps it is a recognition of squandered potential in concept and execution?
Then again, Dead Heat was definitely not the draw for the evening. Cannibal Holocaust stole the show even before the episode aired.
Dead Heat could have been a better movie. I can only give it two and a half Cthulhus out of five. If the film hadn’t been as crazy as it ended up by the end I would have rated it lower.
(2.5 / 5)
Best Line: “God wants us to live forever. And even if he doesn’t, you could always buy him off.” – Loudermilk
Cannibal Holocaust
Opening Rant: Vegan Meat
The buzz around this week was already huge in the MutantFam as this was the rare time that Joe Bob revealed a movie early on. Cannibal Holocaust (1980) is a lightning rod of controversy and emotions in the horror community. I won’t say it is a “love it or hate it” film as my own feelings are fairly ambivalent, but it is most assuredly polarizing.
So, the thing about Cannibal Holocaust is, in my estimation, that any weight we attach to the film in the form of messages is in spite of director Ruggero Deodato’s efforts. The film is an exploitation piece, through and through, and it’s pretty good at that. It is a cannibal mondo and delivers some pretty gruesome stuff. Yet, the anti-colonial reading of the film is definitely more attributable to critics and viewers. Deodato has said a lot about the film since and has said the “right” things about intent, but the production of the film feels otherwise. I won’t relay the long, convoluted history of Cannibal Holocaust, but others have.
The film is largely ham-handed in messaging. Violence is swift, exploitative, and animal cruelty is a real issue. Joe Bob did verify that the animals slaughtered on camera were used to feed local indigenous actors, which doesn’t quite make it acceptable by any means but eases the sting of it a bit. Yet there are moments of brilliance.
The score is one of the haunting and iconic audio accompaniments to grotesque violence and exploitation shown on the screen. The score is downright beautiful and the juxtaposition of a romantic melody set against the slaughter of human beings works incredibly well in promoting unease in the whole on-screen enterprise.
This paragraph will have spoilers, so please skip it if you intend to watch the movie. I do not want to ruin two particular scenes. With that out of the way, it feels strange to say, but the best moment of the film could go to two scenes: In the first, the manipulative filmmakers burn down a hut full of trapped indigenous people and in the aftermath, the lead producer and his co-producer have sex near the smoking ruins in a scene of excess cruelty. So much interpretive work can be done based around this scene. It’s masterfully executed in establishing the Green Inferno-crew as the” real cannibals,” a sentiment delivered at the end of the film. The second scene is equally cruel: the three men of the camera crew rape and indigenous woman and the sole woman member of the crew protests, not about the rape, but the waste of film; after all, they can’t show this to the public.
These scenes of cruelty are intended as set up for why the events of the film play out, but they come off as so much more because of the cultural cachet of the film. Cannibal Holocaust is just one of those movies that carries a certain weight. Few people would straight up say itis their all-time favorite among certain company, though it certainly is an all-time favorite for some.
The problem is that, ultimately, Cannibal Holocaust just isn’t that good as a movie. It’s not exactly “fun,” though fun is not necessarily the be-all measure of quality. It’s not exactly deep, either, as it is a blunt metaphor that was sharpened by viewers after the fact. Most of the horror of the film stems from animal slaughter and barring a couple of moments, most of the gore is passable at best. The film’s most iconic shock is often displayed right on the cover of the DVD or on the theatrical poster. The film offers little besides novelty and is an interesting footnote in the debate of films and obscenity.
Yet, I firmly believe that any serious advocate for film should see this film. It is a strange contrast I must deal with; it’s not good, but it is also something to be seen.
Joe Bob’s assessment of the film, to me, seemed a bit mixed. There was a fair and justified amount of criticism regarding elements of the film, but what was interesting was the way he had handled the aspect of animal cruelty. Yes, animals were harmed in the making of the film and committed to celluloid, but those animals were also used as food. It’s an ugly bit of filmmaking but it is also something that has been overblown, to a degree.
The majority of the criticism revolved around the direction, and I definitely found myself in agreement in that regard. In my own estimation, Ruggero Deodato is an inconsistent center to such a touchstone in the horror community, and his on-set choices and antics are equally as problematic as the animal abuse. I cracked this joke during the live-tweet, but I think it summed up my feelings pretty succinctly.
Joe Bob has talked at length about the (hard “I”) Italian film industry of the 60s, 70s, and 80s. It was nuts. Imagine how crazy a person is to be considered too crazy for the Italian film industry.
The real highlight of the evening, however, was the sense of care for viewers that the crew of The Last Drive-In places into their show. The disclaimers were frequent, one at the end of the break between films, Shudder’s own disclaimer, the film’s disclaimer, the social media disclaimers in the lead up to the film, and Darcy’s own trigger-warning tweets as the film aired. It reflects well on Joe Bob Briggs and those with whom he has surrounded himself in this stage of his career.
Given the film, it is ironic that I can use the word heartwarming to describe the night as beyond the many warnings meant to protect those who may be unable to handle the content of the film there was something new. Something fans have wanted for a while: Host segments with timestamps, detached from the film. More are on the way for previous movies that have long slipped the grasp of Shudder, but rolling them out starting with Cannibal Holocaust is incredibly fitting. The ongoing BBQ gag throughout the host segments in the latter half of the night was incredibly cute as well.
Ultimately, Joe Bob’s score for Cannibal Holocaust is a reflection of polarization. It’s either four stars or one star. It just depends on how you approach it. As for me, the film scores three Cthulhus. It’s important but it’s not necessarily good.
(3 / 5)
Best Line: “Ah, yes, that’s typical Western thought. Civilized, isn’t it? That’s what Alan thought and that’s why he’s dead. The Yacumo Indian is a primitive, and he has to be respected as such. You know, did you ever think of the Yacumo point of view, that we might be the ones who are savages?” – Monroe
Haunted MTL Drive-In Totals
As always, Shudder shares those wonderful recaps. Cannibal Holocaust‘s are, as expected, pretty wild.
As for the Haunted MTL tally?
- 2 Bolos
- 2 Ineffectual Zombie Gimp Robbers
- 2 Dead Monkeys
- 3 Tribes
- 3 BBQ Styles
- 6 Yuki Sightings
- 700 Cop Cliches
- Trailer Opening
- Twin Peaks Connecting
- Darcy Jailing
- BBQing
- Lincoln/Kennedy Joking
- Nun Joking
- Woman Melting
- Tactical Vincent Price
- Mangled Dick Expert Felissa Rose
- Course-Correcting Gunfights
- Gratuitous One-Liners from Joe Piscopo
- Gratuitous Character Actors
- Disclaimer Fu
- Lipstick Fu
- Deli Fu
- Launching Off Motorcycle Fu
- Silver Bolo Award Winner: The Homicidal Homemaker
- Darcy Cosplay: The Turtle’s Revenge
Episode Score
While the energy felt a little lacking surrounding Dead Heat, the crew more than made up for it with the shenanigans surrounding the airing of Cannibal Holocaust. Had the discussion and host segments not delivered I very likely could have dipped below a four here.
(4 / 5)
As always, join us for live-tweets for the remainder of the season.
We’ve reached the end of the road in Marvel’s Agatha All Along. As it turns out, it had a hell of a final twist.
I guess we can’t be surprised.
The story
We begin this episode with Jen and Billy mourning the loss of Lilia. Agatha doesn’t seem phased at first, but it’s fairly clear she’s hurting. At least, it’s clear how she’s lashing out at everyone around her.
Eventually, the three find themselves in the final challenge of the Witch’s Road. There, Jen and Billy get what they want, though through some unexpected means.
Agatha, though, doesn’t get what she wants. Instead, she gets a knock-out fight with Rio in the real world. And Rio is playing for keeps. In the end, she has to decide between her own life, and Billy’s.
What worked
I don’t think I’ve said this once, but it does bear saying. So let’s get it out of the way first. This episode, and frankly the whole show, was so pretty. The effects are lovely, dark and gothic. The costumes were like something out of a witchy or emo teen’s wildest dreams. Every single building from every single challenge was gorgeous. And the road itself was, frankly, too beautiful to be scary. Even though it probably would have killed me.
There was one scene in this episode that knocked it out of the park, visually. And it was the result of one character’s death. I won’t say who, but you’ll know it when you see it. The colors and atmosphere were just fantastic.
Of course, that isn’t all this episode had going for it. We also saw one of the most touching moments of the series, and maybe one of the most heartbreaking scenes from anything I’ve seen this year. If you’ve been online at all since the episode came out, I’m sure you’ve already run across it.
Billy asks Agatha if he’s killing a teenage boy so that his brother can live.
No, she tells him. Sometimes boys just die. Of course, it’s her son she’s thinking of.
This was such a quiet, sad moment from a show that has been so loud and fast-paced. It’s a moment of deep sorrow from a character who’s always had a smile on her face. Even if she’s laughing at someone else’s tragedy.
Finally, I couldn’t possibly review this episode of Agatha All Along without talking about the season-ending twist. And my Goddess, it was a good one. I don’t dare ruin it for you. So let me just say this.
I complained loudly about the twist ending in a recent episode of American Horror Stories. There, I said that a twist isn’t satisfying unless you can look back and realize it was adequately foreshadowed. It’s a hard thing, to foreshadow something without giving the whole thing away. But this twist, when you get to it, makes so much sense. It could never have been any other way. And so many things make more sense now. I can’t wait to watch the whole series again now, with this new perspective.
What didn’t work
It’s honestly hard to say anything bad about this episode. But I do have one complaint. And that complaint is about Jen.
I love this character, don’t get me wrong. But I feel like we missed a step in her character arch.
In the beginning, Jen is self-centered and angry. She’s full of herself. By the end, she wants to protect Agatha and Billy. She wants to make sure they make it off the road. And while I suppose one could argue that she was moved by Lilia’s sacrifice, it doesn’t seem like enough. I think this could have been solved with a flashback, or something from Jen’s point of view. But without it, this just doesn’t feel right.
We may have reached the end of The Road, but we are still not quite done with the story. So check back soon for our final review of Agatha All Along.
Follow me, my friend, to glory at the end.
(4.5 / 5)
I’ve just finished watching the sixth episode of season three of American Horror Stories, titled Clone. In which a young man has to live with the clone of his lover after said lover has health complications. And, well, that’s 47 minutes of my life I’ll never get back.
The story
Our story begins with a quiet birthday celebration between our two main characters, John and David. David is a billionaire who’s getting on in years. He’s frustrated by what he perceives to be a lack of drive in his younger partner. But when David has a stroke and needs to seek serious medical care, he sends a clone of himself to keep John company.
At first, John is incredibly put off by the clone. Until he realizes that the clone might just be the real love of his life.
What worked
This wasn’t a completely terrible episode. There was a lot about the premise that I enjoyed.
Most of the tension in this episode comes from John feeling like he isn’t in control of his life. He feels, rightfully so, that David is simply telling him how to live. And this is something that I don’t think we talk about enough.
This also comes up when John’s horrible friend, Jordan, tries to assault him. Once again, John feels entirely out of control of his life. He feels like a victim, and rightfully so.
I enjoyed the scene in which the David clone kills Jordan and chops him up in little pieces. This was a delightfully bloody romp, funny and dark.
What didn’t work
Unfortunately, that’s where the good part of the story stops. And most of the good acting stops with it.
Look, I usually have high expectations for acting in American Horror Story. I was especially expecting good things when I saw that David was played by Victor Garber. And that man has never acted badly in his life.
While I won’t say that Garber did a bad job here, he’s far too professional for that, I will say that it felt like he was phoning it in. He just didn’t seem like he was having fun. And that’s the kindest thing I can say about the acting.
No one else knew what the hell they were doing. It’s impossible to tell whether the main character John, played by Guy Burnet, is emotionless or just high the whole time. He can barely seem to work up any emotions, even when being almost assaulted.
The poor acting plays a part in this story being very, very dull. There are a few fun scenes, like the slaughter of Jordan. But they are shoved between long boring scenes where characters talk to each other about nothing interesting and chop onions.
I’d also like to complain about the ending. I’m going to try not to spoil it, like I did for the last episode. So I’ll be as vague as possible. Yes, it’s true that I didn’t see the ending coming. But that’s because the ending makes no sense.
Look, we all want to be surprised by an ending. But that surprise only works if it makes sense. If we can look back on the story and see the breadcrumbs that brought us here, then it’s great. But if you just throw in a twist that doesn’t fit, just to have a surprise ending, then that just feels cheap. This ending felt cheap.
Finally, and this isn’t just a complaint about this episode, I am so sick of stories about rich people walking around their rich houses with their rich problems. I am, in short, sick of rich main characters.
Killer Queens, I am starting to feel discouraged. This episode of American Horror Stories was not good television. Neither was the last one. In fact, the whole last season of American Horror Story was pretty terrible. But there are three episodes left in this season. So I’m going to hold out hope that this season has some good chills and gore waiting for us still.
Hopefully, they won’t let me down.
(2 / 5)
Movies n TV
Juju Stories (2022), a Film Review
Juju Stories (2022) is a horror anthology of Nigerian folklore, evoking the directorial visions of C.J. Obasi, Abba Makama, & Michael Omonua.
Juju Stories (2022) is a horror anthology following tales of Nigerian folklore and juju, evoking the directorial visions of C.J. Obasi, Abba Makama, and Michael Omonua. This unrated film stars Belinda Agedah Yanga, Paul Utomi, Elvis Poko, Don Ekwuazi, Nengi Adoki, and Bukola Oladipupo. As of this review, the film is only available on Amazon Prime.
Mercy (Belinda Agedah Yanga) uses a juju potion to entice her lover (Paul Utomi as Leonard). Amos (Don Ekwuazi) wanders the streets, unaware his life will change forever. Chinwe (Bukola Oladipupo) suffers misfortune as others claim her friend is a witch (Nengi Adoki as Joy).
Thoughts on Juju Stories’ “Love Potion” by Michael Omonua
The first “chapter” of Juju Stories follows a story of false love and manipulation. While not a particularly scary story, it earns recognition as the most unsettlingly real. The juju empowers a type of manipulation that we find in too many relationships. Of the three short films, “Love Potion” provides an intimate cinematography, perfectly feeding into the delusion of the characters. This entry appeals to me most, though I admit it’s likely not the entry that haunts a viewer. It’s the least concerned in horrifying the audience, with only one moment of body horror that might get some level of engagement in said area. A final note of approval is Belinda Agedah Yanga’s Mercy. Her performance seems the strongest of the three shorts, though “Love Potion” gives her more to work with as the central character.
A few considerations for viewers are the concept of a love potion in general, forcing a victim to love the owner of said potion. Another consideration is the brief moment of body horror. Though, a more accurate description leans toward bodily horror. It intentionally indulges in the grotesque to solidify the dark implications. However, it’s not proper body horror or particularly grotesque for most horror fans.
Thoughts on Juju Stories’ “YAM” by Abba Makama
“YAM” provides the most politically charged entry of Juju Stories, following characters of different economic classes as they live their lives. This entry provides a fabulism to its horror that leans towards metaphor or symbolism. The focus feels too scattered for my liking, but I recognize my own ignorance of juju or Nigerian culture might make the social critique misfire for me. However, it balances three plotlines within its time frame. A full-length feature might better explore the message of “YAM.”
The only consideration that comes to mind is that of mental illness. However, the examples in question lean more toward the fabulism aspects of the short film. Still, the story does show a character’s breaking mental state.
Thoughts on Juju Stories’ “Suffer the Witch” by C.J. Obasi
Of the three entries in Juju Stories, “Suffer the Witch” earns a placement as the most horror-focused short film. As an anthology revolving around juju, it’s only natural a witch occupies space in Juju Stories. “Suffer the Witch” creates a more haunting and horrifying plot, producing a genuinely effective witch horror in a short runtime. However, it’s also the entry that targets the youngest audience, focusing on teens in high school. The tone reflects this target audience.
There is a brief moment of nudity. It’s not particularly exploitative, aside from the target audience being younger. Another point of consideration is the queer coding of the villain added at the end. It’s interpretable, but it’s a point worth mentioning for consideration.
Final Thoughts
Juju Stories provides three short films rooted in Nigerian juju folklore and culture. The concept stands out against other potential competitors. Each entry adds a different interest to appeal to a wider audience, but this decision also means not all will haunt said audience. When there are only three entries to discuss, that could mean one-third doesn’t hit the mark, if not more.
This film earned 4 awards and 1 nomination, making respectable waves with critics. (2.5 / 5)
