Notes from The Last Drive-In: S2E8
This might be the best night in the history of The Last Drive-In, especially in a season that has largely been nothing but highs. We not only get an excellent anthology in Scare Package but we get the infamous, the legendary, Hogzilla. A night so full of Joe Bob he was also in the damn movies!
Scare Package (2019)
Opening Rant: Graceland!
How the hell do I review an anthology given the current format of Notes from The Last Drive-In? One segment at a time, apparently. Scare Package is a hilarious horror-comedy anthology comprised of seven films that tackle different horror genres and have their own unique style. As a whole, the anthology is largely excellent and worth a rewatch. At an individual level, however, some of the segments are stronger than others.
I say seven films, as that is how Scare Package was marketed, but that is slightly misleading as the cold open and framing decide end up also coming together into a third, distinct narrative. As such, we technically have eight narratives, not counting the overall package itself, the anthology. Between the first half of the night and the last half, then, I need to review 10 things.
You’re killing me, Joe Bob. So, I guess we dive in then?
“Cold Open” / “Rad Chad’s Horror Emporium”
“Cold Open” is a fun little way to start the anthology, presenting a suitably meta riff on horror tropes and displaying a goofy and endearing earnestness. Jon Michael Simpson’s Mike Myers and his simple desire to have a bigger part than a bit player make for a nice, quick narrative that also features some decent horror references. Mike’s story segues nicely into the framing narrative, “Rad Chad’s Horror Emporium.”
“Rad Chad’s Horror Emporium” is not really much in the way of a story as it is more written into small sketches that move viewers between segments. With that being said, the framing device really works. It’s a fun video store with a goofy owner, a new guy, and a frequent customer. Each framing segment features plenty of gags for horror fans. Jeremy King’s Chad Buckley is the clear focus of these moments and his broad, obsessive characterization works quite well, particularly with the later payoff of the final segment.
Joe Bob’s assessment of these two segments was glowing, at four stars. While I think “Cold Open” was more entertaining, “Rad Chad’s Horror Emporium” is no comedy slouch either. Staying in line with Joe Bob’s scoring, I’d put the two of them together at four and a half Cthulhus.
(4.5 / 5)
“One Time in the Woods”
A few of these segments are more like sketches than real narratives. But that is a given with anthologies, especially with an anthology so absolutely stacked full of stories. Granted that this is no The ABCs of Death, but there are still a lot of segments, here. “One Time in the Woods” is a wacky and I dare say Pythonesque bit. I reminded me of the classic “Sam Peckinpah’s ‘Salad Days'”sketch from Flying Circus.
Joe Bob gave “One Time in the Woods” four stars and as a sketch I completely agree. It’s hilarious, gory, and I was laughing so much I had to stop taking notes. I give it five Cthulhus.
(5 / 5)
“M.I.S.T.E.R.”
“M.I.S.T.E.R.” is an interesting idea that feels a little too scattershot and undercooked. It features some very familiar faces (Noah Segan and Jon Gabrus) and a hilarious segment of werewolf slaughter, but the logic of the story is a little weak and it feels strung together as a whole. The connection between predatory werewolves and Men’s Rights Advocacy makes a lot of metaphorical sense and is worth exploring. It just does not necessarily work here.
Joe Bob gave “M.I.S.T.E.R.” two and a half stars. That seems about right. I give “M.I.S.T.E.R.” three Cthulhus.
(3 / 5)
“Girls Night Out of Body”
“Girls Night Out of Body” was not the strongest of the narratives but it was more developed than a few of the other segments. Where “Girls Night Out of Body” succeeds is in style. This was the most gorgeously shot and arranged of the segments with bold color choices reminiscent of Giallo. The lack of a strong narrative here works against it but as an anthology segment it still ends up being fun. It presents some cool visuals and has a fun, if not particularly deep, story. It works well enough for its runtime.
Joe Bob gave it about two stars. I feel like he was a bit stingy here. I was more enthused by it, giving it three and a half Cthulhus. I’ll be first in line when they expand it into a full movie.
(3.5 / 5)
“The Night He Came Back Again! Part IV: The Final Kill”
Another segment that feels more like a sketch than a story, but it is absolutely hilarious. For my money, it might tie with “One Time in the Woods” for the funniest segment of the anthology. This segment is presented as being part of the ending to a longer film. We catch the finale of the slasher where the protagonists have captured the clown-killer and try to dispose of him in hilarious and graphic ways. This segment might be the tropiest of the bunch.
Joe Bob gave this one four stars. He likes the messy ones, apparently. I give this one four Cthulhus.
(4 / 5)
“So Much To Do”
MST3K-alumn Baron Vaughn’s “So Much to Do” is a cute little segment. It’s pretty cheesy down to stock 1980s title cards on the TV, and it’s definitely more on the skit-side of the anthology spectrum. The fight is fun and the crosscutting between the living room and the tv-show makes for some frantic editing here and there. The story makes little sense, but beyond that it’s still pretty neat.
Joe Bob only gave it two stars. I am a bit more generous, particularly because I am a fan of Vaughn and I am allowed to play by my own rules. I give it three Cthulhus.
(3 / 5)
“Horror Hypothesis”
The largest and most developed segment of the anthology ends up being the strongest one, narratively speaking. It also features one of the best Last Drive-In twists… at least until Hogzilla later that night. This segment builds on “Cold Open” and “Rad Chad’s Horror Emporium” taking the Chad character and putting him into his own little meta-horror film. All of the gags built around researching horror and the lampshade-hanging present are worth a laugh. I put it pretty succinctly in a tweet during the marathon.
The film predates the Joe Bob Briggs’ resurgence via Shudder a bit so it is fantastic to see a movie that thinks so highly of him that they brought him in. Joe Bob plays himself here and it is every bit as funny as you’d expect. The segment also features Goldust himself, Dustin Rhodes, as the tragic serial killer.
Joe Bob had some fun stuff to say about the movie, but considering each break was the presentation of more and more Drive-In Totals this is probably one of the lesser nights for the level of film insight we are used to. But you know what? That’s okay. It was a stacked night. Scare Package didn’t get an overall rating, but “Horror Hypothesis” did at four stars. so I have no stars to report beyond the individual segments. As for me, I give Scare Package four and a half Cthulhus.
(4 / 5)
Best Line: No line needed when we have this absolute gem of a Tweet.
Hogzilla
Opening Rant: Joe Bob can’t even right now.
Hogzilla is one of those monkey paw sorts of movies. It obtained an almost mythical status among viewers. The MutantFam hyped the film up to a huge degree because it starred Joe Bob Briggs and was considered a lost film that never really saw release. A film so neglected it took Diana Prince, our very own Mail Girl, to engage in tracking it down and getting a re-edit of the film prepared to be shown on Shudder.
The problem is, Hogzilla isn’t very good at all. It’s more of a curiosity than a movie. I mean, just read this synopsis according to IMDB.
A tabloid news crew ventures into the backwoods of Central Florida to investigate reports of an aggressive feral hog who the locals call Hogzilla. What they find, though, are demons, devils, creeping things and pure evil.
Hogzilla synopsis courtesy of IMDB
This is not the movie we saw during The Last Drive-In. The above sounds vaguely structured and at least conceptually weak but still somewhat sound. It’s hard to really view Hogzilla as a movie at all. It’s some sort of tulpa of Drive-In wackiness we have collectively willed into existence.
And yet it made for a memorable and delightful evening.
The movie teases an showdown with a giant, feral hog and never really delivers a satisfying glimpse of the beast. Budget and technical issues prevent than and most of the hog-murder-action comes in the form of offscreen antics and POV shots from the porcine killer. It’s like a backwoods Floridian JAWS, only without any real merits beyond a surprisingly earnest performance by Joe Bob Briggs.
Joe Bob Briggs, also known as John Bloom, is not just our favorite horror host, but an author and actor. He’s been in some good movies and he’s not a bad actor in the least. He’s never really had to carry a movie, but he is certainly no slouch when he’s popped up in different films. Sure a great many of these rolls are the sort of wink-wink-nudge appearances you expect from movie-obsessed directors, but appearances in The Stand, Great Balls of Fire!, Casino, and Face/Off are genuinely pretty good moments on his part.
So it was fitting that the only real thing that worked in Hogzilla was Joe Bob Briggs. It’s impossible for anyone to carry Hogzilla but we spent an hour and thirty minutes watching him do his best and it was pretty damn satisfying. At this point I don’t know if Joe Bob can really get more serious, non-winking film roles, but the guy deserves some.
Joe Bob had Hogzilla sprung on him (as much as a scripted movie marathon show can “spring” anything on the guy who writes it) but it was a genuinely charming and entertaining night, leading in from Scare Package, where he kept needling Darcy about the second film and playing it with all the spoiled, requisite grumpiness we’d expect. The segments surrounding the feature were a treat with what appeared to be a progressively more hammered Joe Bob Briggs poking fun at himself and the movie.
The biggest moment of the night, however, was the delivery of the Drive-In Totals by Darcy. This was a Drive-In first. I have loved all the mail girls across the various Joe Bob shows but Darcy is the best of them all, shaping her role into more of a co-host than a supporting player. Tonight proved that Darcy is absolutely indispensable to The Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs. The show may be named after Joe Bob Briggs but Darcy has become the beating heart of the community that has grown around the show.
Not only does she provide a fun foil to our host but she has her own impact through cosplay, checking Joe Bob on dumb crap he sometimes rattles off, and going above and beyond the role of the supporting character. She accompanies Joe Bob across the country on his tours, she live-tweets with the MutantFam, and she has networked to get great guests and Hogzilla onto the show.
We should all be so lucky to find a collaborator and friend like Diana Prince in our own lives. Joe Bob and Darcy are The Last Drive-In.
Darcy’s take on Hogzilla was that of a cheerleader. I don’t mean that in a dismissive way, either. Hogzilla is a great moment for the show and I get the four-star rating. It made for an amazing episode of television. However, I can’t really give Hogzilla a pass. It’s a one and a half star film, and that one star is reserved for Joe Bob, the only bright spot in that mess.
(1.5 / 5)
Best Line: “It’s gonna get nasty.”
Haunted MTL Drive-In Totals
We have a lot of Drive-In totals tonight, and Drive-In Total history as well. Each segment of Scare Package received its own totals, and Darcy got to share the Drive-In Totals for Hogzilla. What a night!
What, you think we’re done? Nope, we have our own totals. A smaller set, but Totals none the less!
- 8 Directors
- 4 Cold Opens
- 6 Attempts to Kill the Killer
- Shear Fu
- Cracker Barrel Fu
- Epistemology Fu
- The-Ate-Er Fu
- Wilhelm Fu
- Denouement Fu
- Hurricane Fu
- Ghost Fu
- Corpse Digging
- Shoplifting
- Bowel Shitting
- Macguffin Dropping
- Horror Host Joking
- Religious Joking
- Darcy Jailing
- Tusk Stuffing
- Blonde Joking
- Meta Madness
- Graceland Darcy
- Gratuitous Joe Bob
- Tactical Piggy Hat
- Darcy Cosplay: Joe Bob Briggs
- Silver Bolo Winner: The Signal Podcast
Episode Score
File this episode under “all time great.” I am curious if The Last Drive-In is going to even attempt to top this one.
(5 / 5)
Remember, folks, keep your hogs at bay lest ye end up prey to the mighty Hogzilla. Also, join us for the live-tweet session during The Last Drive-In season two finale next Friday!
Movies n TV
Anna (2013) To Some, Mindscape to Others, a Thriller Film
Anna (2013), also known as Mindscape, is a psychological thriller of a struggling memory detective named John.
Anna (2013), also known as Mindscape, is a psychological thriller directed by Jorge Dorado. This R-rated directorial debut stars Mark Strong, Taissa Farmiga, Brian Cox, Saskia Reeves, Richard Dillane, and Indira Varma. As of this review, interested viewers can watch this film on VUDU, Hoopla, Plex Channel, Pluto TV, Roku Channel, Tubi TV, Amazon Prime, and more. Anna originally released in 2013, but it released in the US in 2014.
Struggling to return to his work as a memory detective, John (Mark Strong) pursues a new assignment. Anna (Taissa Farmiga) views John as her last chance to prove her innocence before she’s condemned to an asylum. As John searches through her memories, a tale of abuse and manipulation unravels.
What I Like about Anna (2013)
Anna earned three nominations but no award recognition. From the Sitges–Catalonian International Film Festival, it earned a nomination for Best Motion Picture. The Goya Awards recognized Jorge Dorado with the 2014 nomination for Best New Director. Finally, Anna received a nomination from the Gaudí Awards for Best Art Direction.
Taissa Farmiga’s performance balances the line between suspicious and innocent, which is necessary for this unraveling mystery. It’s a delicate role, but Taissa Farmiga brings to life the material given.
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Anna‘s plot rotates around a new fringe science that’s slowly gaining traction. It’s less a dissection of this science and more a norm that Anna expects viewers to believe. It’s an interesting concept, though not unique. Still, it’s a nice additional dynamic to the mystery.
While not a horrifying film, it does deliver a mystery that keeps viewers engaged with enough hooks to add an extra layer before something gets stale. That mystery does linger in the mind in some respects but doesn’t haunt the viewer.
Tired Tropes and Triggers
Despite Anna not depicting these moments, sexual assault remains a recurring element of the film. Little remains conclusive, with some suggestions that these are false allegations. Furthering this point, the film depicts Anna as a manipulator and flirt when some incidents suggest she’s a survivor of assault.
Derogatory language might upset some, but these remain brief moments. The use indicates a particular character’s immaturity, but I’ll raise the point regardless. Furthering this line of analysis is a moment where a bullied character is implied to be gay, but it’s likely just an insult.
While not inherently a trigger, this new field of science earns the claim of being somewhere between forensic science and lie detector tests, a massive gap that anything can fit in. It makes everything subjective when the film wants to claim absolute evidence. I can’t help but wonder what exploring that unreliability might look like, but that’s not this film.
What I Dislike about Anna (2013)
The biggest deal breaker for some is this concept of a teen mastermind. I won’t go into details about the mystery, but I am often fatigued with this idea of a teen femme fatale. While Anna gives enough mystery, it’s an overused trope.
Mark Strong’s performance delivers on the material, but John seems so easily manipulated for someone who does this as a profession. While out of practice, I don’t understand why he believes or doesn’t believe information. If Anna depicts John as overly critical or gullible, the film will have a more consistent character.
I assume there remains an understandable reason for the name change, but Anna appears as a common title for a film, spinning a series of some recognition. Mindscape also earns some recognition and competition, but it’s a more memorable title than a single noun name.
Final Thoughts
Anna provides an interesting concept and mystery, but many shortcomings hinder the execution. Viewers eager for a psychological mystery with a drop of sci-fi, Anna delivers an engaging story. However, the market does provide competition, making it a tough film to recommend. (3 / 5)
Movies n TV
Tips on Raising Evil from “The Demon of Parenthood”
The assessors investigate cursed toys in an attack against commerce, but Ben has a finger on the issue in “The Demon of Parenthood.”
“The Demon of Parenthood” is the eighth episode of season 3 of Evil, created by Michelle King and Robert King. The central cast includes Katja Herbers, Mike Colter, Aasif Mandvi, Michael Emerson, Christine Lahti, and Andrea Martin. As of this review, it’s available through Netflix and Paramount+ and its add-ons.
The assessors investigate cursed toys in a terrible attack against commerce, but Ben (Aasif Mandvi) has a finger on the potential issue. David (Mike Colter) receives another task from the Entity. Kristen (Katja Herbers) learns more about her missing egg. Leland (Michael Emerson) invites Dr Boggs (Kurt Fuller) to the darker side of spirituality. Sheryl (Christine Lahti) takes her granddaughter to work.
What I Like about “The Demon of Parenthood”
I enjoy the espionage aspect of the Entity, pushing David to questionable grounds as he navigates what’s right against what’s demanded of him. While this plotline doesn’t reach its full potential, this episode highlights one of the more interesting opportunities of this idea. The Entity consistently interferes with the procedural case, possibly covering up abuse to support its objectives. This episode highlights this dynamic to perfection.
Kristen gets pulled in multiple directions, forced to question her trust in David, and faces a unique horror after learning about her missing egg. While I won’t dive deeper into this issue for this review, it’s safe to say this episode belongs to Kristen, and Katja Herbers delivers.
Her unsettling night terrors suggest an intuitive understanding of some of the manipulations around her, highlighting these moments to the viewer by proxy. Beyond these meta moments, the execution of these night terrors remains pleasantly unsettling.
![Evil: Season Three [DVD]](https://hauntedmtl.com/wp-content/plugins/aawp/public/image.php?url=YUhSMGNITTZMeTl0TG0xbFpHbGhMV0Z0WVhwdmJpNWpiMjB2YVcxaFoyVnpMMGt2TlRGYWJYaGtVVFpFYlV3dVgxTk1NVFl3WHk1cWNHYz18MTc0MDM5NTAyNQ=)
- Katja Herbers, Mike Colter, Aasif Mandvi (Actors)
- Robert King (Director)
- Audience Rating: NR (Not Rated)
![Evil: Season Three [Blu-Ray]](https://hauntedmtl.com/wp-content/plugins/aawp/public/image.php?url=YUhSMGNITTZMeTl0TG0xbFpHbGhMV0Z0WVhwdmJpNWpiMjB2YVcxaFoyVnpMMGt2TlRFdGJuQndVRmhtU1V3dVgxTk1NVFl3WHk1cWNHYz18MTc0MDM5NTAyNQ=)
- Katja Herbers, Mike Colter, Aasif Mandvi (Actors)
- Robert King (Director)
- Audience Rating: NR (Not Rated)
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Among a constant trail of failures, Leland lingers in the background as he puts pieces together for his master plan. We don’t see the full scope of his vision yet, but the suspense it builds for future episodes earns its place. I’m interested to see how these plots will evolve, even if Leland’s luck seems to turn sour. Perhaps it’s because of this dynamic that the tension works so effectively.
With a shocking moment tied into this episode, “The Demon of Parenthood” creates one of the more haunting episodes. However, the greatest accomplishment in the episode is what it establishes for the future of the series. While not all these points follow through by the end of Evil, it’s still an episode that ripples across the show’s progression.
Tired Tropes and Triggers
Without diving into too many details, spousal abuse and murder occur in the episode. This abuse might indicate a demonic influence, but such points remain speculation.
A severed body part and some gore stand out in this episode. It hardly earns enough attention from fans of gory horror, but the squeamish should tread carefully toward the end.
What I Dislike about “The Demon of Parenthood”
Many dropped ideas seem genuinely interesting, building to some potential development that receives little payoff. Missing these opportunities will never feel satisfying. While some changes are understandable, it creates holes in the narrative. For example, Dr. Boggs’ dark seduction slows in pace, becoming implied or withheld from the audience soon after “The Demon of Parenthood.” These experiences often adapt the concept of evil that the show seeks to bring to life.
Sheryl’s compliance with Leland’s plan still seems underdeveloped as a concept, especially with how far she takes it in this episode. While later episodes add a different perspective, I can’t help but feel these are retcons or concepts not thoroughly thought out.
Final Thoughts
“The Demon of Parenthood” progresses the plot and delivers some genuinely haunting moments. While a retrospective assessment does note many missed opportunities, the episode stands up beyond these missed opportunities. (4.5 / 5)
Movies n TV
You’ll Have a Bloody Good Time with this Eternal (2004) Health Tip
When Raymond Pope’s wife disappears, he follows the trail. But each lead points him to the Eternal beauty of Elizabeth Kane.
Eternal (2004) is a horror thriller written and directed by Wilhelm Liebenberg and Federico Sanchez. This R-rated film stars Caroline Néron, Victoria Sanchez, Conrad Pla, and Ilona Elkin. As of this review, it is available for Amazon Prime members with renting options from Spectrum on Demand.
When Raymond Pope’s (Conrad Pla) wife disappears, he’s swept into the mystery of Elizabeth Kane (Caroline Néron). As his investigation becomes increasingly bizarre, bodies pile up and point to Raymond Pope. Will he clear his name, or will this bloody rampage drown him?
What I Like about Eternal
While all of the performances add to the film, Eternal thrives on the charisma and mystique of Caroline Néron’s Elizabeth. She enchants her targets, lowering their defenses until that final moment.
Conrad Pla’s Raymond Pope also requires a delicate approach to succeed. The sleazy and hypocritical detective seems genuinely concerned for his wife (at least initially) and sells that concern. While far from an easy character to root for, the audience understands him and the danger he faces.
There’s a heavy erotic thriller angle that Eternal delivers on. I’ll linger on this point in later sections, but it certainly knows how to build tension within a single scene or between characters. These moments don’t feel forced, and while they often target a male audience, interesting dynamics rise above general exploitative content, if only slightly.
This seems to be a passion project between the creators, Wilhelm Liebenberg and Federico Sanchez. This passion lingers in the moments to deliver something unique, if not without its flaws. The film doesn’t hold back, a point that fluctuates between negative and positive depending on the situation. Regardless, it holds a charm in that commitment that’s hard to replicate without passion behind the scenes.
Tired Tropes and Triggers
The film labels itself as “Inspired by True Events,” which only relates to the general discussion of Elizabeth Báthory. It’s also worth mentioning that, much like Vlad Dracula, her story remains heavily dominated by modern interpretations. I won’t pretend to hold exclusive knowledge of these historical figures, but cultural interpretation reduces realism. The claim means little to nothing.
The predatory queer trope applies to Eternal, with little complexity to challenge the point as the violence often targets women. It’s important to note that Elizabeth acts as a femme fatale in general, but the targets remain clear. However, this film did earn a moment of recognition from the Glitter Awards (a clip was used in 2006), which might suggest the standout performance of Caroline Néron’s Elizabeth earns back some goodwill.
What I Dislike about Eternal
The erotic thriller holds a stigma that Eternal doesn’t challenge. Elizabeth remains a clear femme fatale with a slightly supernatural twist. While the performance executes this character perfectly, viewers likely know if this remains an interest or a tired cliche for themselves.
While most of Raymond’s acts make sense for the character, I hold issue with the end. Without going into too many details, he is asked to do one thing to protect himself and does the opposite for no reason. Perhaps this indicates supernatural influence, but such a claim lingers in headcanon.
The film ends ambiguously, which hardly seems fitting given the evidence and weakens the overall film. A definitive ending, or something moderately more definitive, would strengthen Eternal.
Final Thoughts
Eternal’s major obstacle in executing its erotic thriller is that of tired tropes in the modern era. If one looks past these dated points, there’s a haunting thriller that can meet moments of excellence. The plot falls short in many areas towards the end of the film. Ultimately, if a vampire-esque thriller interests you, Eternal certainly adds its perception to the niche but in a familiar form. (3.5 / 5)
