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Warning, make sure you read PART 1, PART 2 and PART 3 before continuing…

The ride was hard, even with the adrenaline pulsing through my veins and urging me on. With my brother’s arm around my neck, I could feel it squeezing tighter as I peddled, barely keeping us straight on the cracked and dried path.

“Hold on, Frankie. Hold on,” I choked out, coughing from the pressure of his arm and the dust swirling from long, languishing breeze against the dried lake.

He whined and cried behind me, sometimes muttering softly, “It burns…It burns!”

By the time we got to the houseboat, though, he was quiet, deadly quiet and my heart was pounding as I slung my leg over the bike to get off. His face was bone-white, sweat pouring down his skin and his eyes were wide and dark. He looked bad, real bad, and wordlessly, he held his hand up.

Whatever it was had spread, blackening his skin down to his wrist. His fingers were gnarled and the fingernails were blue and waxy. It looked dead and suddenly I could smell it. Like a smack to the face, it hit me so hard and so fast, my stomach turned before I can feel anything else.

Shaking, and vomiting, I could only smell it, could taste it in my mouth, that rancid, moist mixture of death and putrification. As much as I tried to breathe clean, fresh air, it wouldn’t dissipate. I got lungful after lungful of that sickening aroma. And it burned deep into me even after I had expelled everything and kept heaving.

After lurching back from him, my brother fell from the bike, landing on the ground. Limp like a moldy dishrag, he didn’t move.

“Fra-! Frank-!” I struggled to speak to him, to get close.

I threw the bike off of him and held my shirt to my mouth and nose, shaking him. “Frankie!”

“What the hell is going on?” I heard my mother say and I glanced to her, horrified.

“Jelly-!” I tried, feeling that seep of decay linger in my throat and sinuses, urging me to vomit again. “He’s sick! His hand!”

In an instant, she was at his side, pushing me away and looking him over. “What? Aiden, I don’t see anything. What’s wrong?”

I could only point to his hand, as it swelled in its purtification, creeping up his forearm. The fingers now looked dried and decimated like the clutched claw of a bird.

“What, Aiden? Where?!” She cried out, looking past his arm, past his hand, turning him over and over.

“His hand…” I whispered in disbelief as she held that arm, that disgusting and grotesque husk, and was unaffected. Even as she held it, I watched as some skin sloughed off in her hand, leaving oozing trails silver pus between her fingers.

“Damn it, Aiden!” She yelled, “Where?”

But she couldn’t see it, I realized, she couldn’t see what I could see. Couldn’t even smell it. Even as she was holding it, even as it was breaking apart in her hands, she just couldn’t see it.

When not ravaging through the wilds of Detroit with Jellybeans the Cat, J.M. Brannyk (a.k.a. Boxhuman) reviews mostly supernatural and slasher films from the 70's-90's and is dubiously HauntedMTL's Voice of Reason. Aside from writing, Brannyk dips into the podcasts, and is the composer of many of HauntedMTL's podcast themes.

Original Series

Nightmarish Nature: Invisibles Among Us

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Sometimes it pays not to be seen, especially if there are things that want to eat you or if you have to sneak up on things to eat them.  So this time on Nightmarish Nature we’re going to look at some of the creatures known for being invisibles among us. Some of these critters engage in mimicry, intentionally looking like other specific things, but a lot of them engage in camouflage, just wanting to blend in. In this segment we’ll consider both but focus more on the latter.

Buggin’ Ya

Some of the most notable invisibles are masters of camouflage in the insect world…  Moths and beetles that look like bark or dead leaves.  Mantids and other insects that look like leaves or flowers.  Those stick bugs and walking sticks that I’m not sure how to classify (are they some kind of weird relations to assassin bugs or their own thing?).  And my personal favorite, Umbonia Crassicornis, a type of tree hopper better known as the thorn bug.  And don’t even get me started on spiders and scorpions…  You could come face to face with pretty much any of these critters while mucking around in your garden and be none the wiser for it unless their movement betrays their location or you happen to scan the area with a blacklight before you dig in.  It’s jump scare central, for sure!

Thorn bug hiding in plain sight on a stick "You don't see me, move along..."
Thorn bug hiding in plain sight on a stick

Leapin’ Lizards

Lizards and amphibians are also masters of disguise, often resembling their surroundings much like the insect world does.  Chameleons are celebrated because of their ability to change color to match their surroundings, but there are several lizards that do this, just not to that extreme.  Like anoles.  Take a trip to Florida and you’ll soon find that you’re being stared at by a lizard you didn’t even know was there, seeing as how anoles are everywhere and get into everything (one recently startled my mother after making its home in a hallway decoration).  You don’t even have to go to Florida, they range anywhere from Texas to North Carolina, and there are other lizards that range further north that do this as well.

Leaf Lizard "Be leaf...  Be leaf..."
Belief is everything to some lizard invisibles.

Cunning Cats

All those coat patterns you see on cats and other ambush hunters aren’t just for show – the spots and stripes allow our feline friends to blend into their surroundings while on the prowl.  Sneaky sneaky.  This helps them to be the amazing hunting machines that they are.  Assuming they don’t raise the bird alarm and draw attention to their whereabouts.  Because birds do love to raise a stink when there’s a feline predator about, and we can’t say we blame them.

Bird flyover yelling "Cat!"
You’ve been spotted… er… striped!

Aquatics

Then when you go underwater, you take it next level.  Camouflage is taken up a notch with seahorses, nudibranchs, and more that look exactly like random flotsam.  Some critters, such as Majoidea crabs, even decorate themselves with ocean debris to blend in.  And octopuses are like underwater chameleons on steroids that also utilize their surroundings to create a sort of protective armor that blends in, like when they carry anything they can grab to protect their squishy selves when sharks are about.  There are even true invisibles like shrimp, fish, and jellyfish that are actually clear except for their internal organs that don’t necessarily register with everything floating about underwater.  Even whales can appear to come out of nowhere depending on your angle to them to start with!

Water whispers "Don't mind us..."
The Deep Ones don’t want the attention.

If you’ve enjoyed this segment of Nightmarish Nature, feel free to check out some previous here:

Vampires Among Us

Perilous Parenting

Freaky Fungus

Worrisome Wasps

Cannibalism

Terrifying Tardigrades

Reindeer Give Pause

Komodo Dragons

Zombie Snails

Horrifying Humans

Giants Among Spiders

Flesh in Flowers

Assassin Fashion

Baby Bomb

Orca Antics

Creepy Spider Facts

Screwed Up Screwworms

Scads of Scat

Starvation Diet

Continue Reading

Original Series

Nightmarish Nature: Starvation Diet

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So, now that it’s getting cold, here on Nightmarish Nature we’re going to talk about a different kind of terror – the starvation diet. It’s winter, and food is becoming ever scarcer, so many creatures will slow down to conserve energy. Let’s take this a step further to the sleep of the damned… But I’m not talking hibernation, or settling in for a sort of long winter nap version of seasonal affective disorder on steroids. No, I’m talking hummingbirds.

Sugar Rush

Hummingbirds are about the polar opposite of what you’d think of when you talk about inactivity. They’re more the picture-perfect speed demons. And yet, due to their crazy high metabolisms and constant need to refuel by consuming all the nectar and insects they can get their little beaks in or on, they have near death experiences on a regular basis. Even during the summer at night whenever the temperature falls too low. It’s like all their systems have to go offline for a bit just so they can survive.

Zzz sleeping off that starvation diet
Zzz

Energy Suck

Essentially a hummingbird burns so much energy that he can die in less than eight hours of not eating. The little sugar daddy needs another fix just to keep going. This lifestyle is a far cry from the Energizer bunny. Essentially he has to enter a torpor state in sleep so he doesn’t succumb to his own starvation diet. Not every time, but when the temperature drops or food is scarce.

A hummingbird in torpor may, by all accounts, appear dead. He can be frozen in place, his tiny feet clasped rigidly around a branch as if rigor mortis has sunk in. He can be cold to the touch and unresponsive. He can face upwards, unmoving, breathing and heart rate slowed to near indiscernibility. He can even be hanging upside down, oblivious to the world. In fact, the hummer’s heart rate can reduce to almost one tenth of his waking state, and his temperature can drop by ~5o degrees Fahrenheit (~ 30 degrees Celsius).

Dead to the world hummingbird in torpor
Dead to the world

Miracle Mavericks

Honestly, as shown in this article on Journey North, this ability to exercise such fine control over metabolic rate on a nightly cycle makes the hummingbirds more marvelous than terrifying, switching between cold- and warm-blooded. And they are very well-adapted to their eating regimens, especially given their diminutive size. But such is the cost of burning so much energy to keep going without much room to store fuel. Like I said, a strict starvation diet.

If you’ve enjoyed this segment of Nightmarish Nature, feel free to check out some previous here:

Vampires Among Us

Perilous Parenting

Freaky Fungus

Worrisome Wasps

Cannibalism

Terrifying Tardigrades

Reindeer Give Pause

Komodo Dragons

Zombie Snails

Horrifying Humans

Giants Among Spiders

Flesh in Flowers

Assassin Fashion

Baby Bomb

Orca Antics

Creepy Spider Facts

Screwed Up Screwworms

Scads of Scat

Continue Reading

Original Series

Nightmarish Nature: Scads of Scat, Beyond Just Goose Poo

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This time on Nightmarish Nature, in honor of Thanksgiving, we’re exploring scads of scat! And not just because of the aftermath of all that eating we’re going to be doing, given that everything that goes in must come out eventually. But because turkeys are weird.

But, how weird?

Apparently, the shape and size of a turkey’s poop can tell you the sex and age of the bird. Male and female birds poop different shaped turds, and bigger ones with age. Your poop can’t do that, we’re pretty sure. And no, we don’t want to check, even if it does come in a whole host of rainbow colors with all the dyes in our food nowadays. Keep your weird quirks to yourself.

Poop Emoji

Fecal Fetishes

Vultures have very acidic scat that helps to keep their feet and food clean of bacteria from hopping in and around dead things. Somehow, this doesn’t seem like a step up to us, but I guess if you’re a carrion crawler you take what you can get. At least you’d know where it’s been I suppose, and that’s more than you can say for some of your long dead food sources…

Rabbits must process their food twice in order to break down the grassy matter they digest (like cows chewing cud). And so they eat their own partially digested matter, the cecotropes they produce after the first digestion. This isn’t true poop per se, that fecal matter comes after second digestion, but it does work its way through the same way.

And that brings us to koalas. They are one of only a few mammals that can eat eucalyptus leaves (and are closely related to wombats, one of the other two). Koala offspring eat their mother’s pap, which is a specialized form of poop that allows the baby to transition from nursing milk to eating solid leaves. It is green, smeary, mushy, and can get everywhere. Just like you’d expect.

Corny Poop Emoji

We aren’t exempt.

For all that we have learned to be poop averse, a lot of animals eat others’ scat and glean a lot of nutritional value from their detritus. It’s not just your dog raiding the cat litter box and then licking you in the face. And we humans have even fought wars over rights to seabird guano, which was used as a form of fertilizer in the late 1800s.

Anyway, that’s the scoop on poop for now. Maybe we’ll revisit this load later on, seeing as how there’s still plenty of content here.

If you’ve enjoyed this segment of Nightmarish Nature, feel free to check out some previous here:

Vampires Among Us

Perilous Parenting

Freaky Fungus

Worrisome Wasps

Cannibalism

Terrifying Tardigrades

Reindeer Give Pause

Komodo Dragons

Zombie Snails

Horrifying Humans

Giants Among Spiders

Flesh in Flowers

Assassin Fashion

Baby Bomb

Orca Antics

Creepy Spider Facts

Screwed Up Screwworms

Continue Reading

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