In the fifth episode of The Witcher, two of the main characters are finally meeting each other. That’s right, Yennifer and Geralt finally come face to face.

And then some.

Geralt is having trouble sleeping. He’s a mess, and he’s pissed. So he’s hunting the waters for a jinn bottle. 

Because that’s what one does when they’re having trouble sleeping.

He’s met in the woods by Jaskier, who tries to steal Geralt’s wishes when he finds the jinn’s bottle. The jinn, taking offense at this, infects his throat. He can’t speak, can’t walk. And when Geralt takes him to a healer, he finds that this disease can only be cured by a mage.

As it turns out, the closest mage happens to be Yennifer.

She’s in the process of torturing a town for trying to arrest her. This includes such amusing tricks as enchanting a room full of nobles to have an orgy. 

Okay, I get a little bit of fan service. But this episode went way above and beyond. There was the aforementioned orgy, of course. But there’s also a bath scene with Geralt and Yennifer. I’m aware that for some insane reason bath scenes are fairly common in The Witcher games, but that’s hardly where it ends. Yennifer is walking around all but naked most of the time. 

This was absolutely unnecessary. It added nothing to the story, it detracted from it.

Yennifer’s motivations were confusing and convoluted through the whole episode. She seems to be lashing out at anyone who tries to tell her what to do in the slightest way. I get that well enough, but I’m super confused why she thought becoming a vessel for a jinn would allow her to have a baby. I don’t understand why she doesn’t just adopt a kid. Hell, kill a kid’s parents and take them. She doesn’t care about anyone but herself. Why almost die? And why, when asked what she wants, does she yell everything? Maybe I’m missing something glaring, but it seems to me that her motivations are all over the place. Not in a creative way, as I’m sure the writers thought. In a messy way. 

This was my least favorite episode so far. I’m hoping it picks up in the next episode.

While all of this is happening, a Dopler comes after Ciri, disguised as Mousesack, one of her grandmother’s advisers. He’s tasked with taking her back to Cahir, the Nilfgaardian soldier. Ciri’s been hiding out with a group of warriors in the Brokilon forest. She could have stayed there, and stayed safe. But she chose to go with someone she thinks is an ally, to do what her grandmother tasked her to do. Find Geralt. A brave, if stupid course of action.

I’m really hoping that this episode was a momentary lapse in judgment.
(3 / 5)