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For those who haven’t seen it yet, the fourth episode of American Horror Story Delicate was an experience. In true American Horror Story fashion, it left me almost speechless.

Almost. Clearly, I found at least a few things to say about it, Killer Queens.

The Story

We begin this episode with a classic American Horror Story flashback. We see a queen just after labor, with a baby she says is a monster. This monster is collected by two familiar faces, who curse the queen’s sister with barrenness before leaving both women screaming in the birth chamber.

Back in the present, Siobhan is worried about Anna’s image. So she brings in two image consultants, Ashley and Ashleigh. We saw them earlier in the episode as well. In the birth chamber.

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Leslie Grossman and Billie Lourd in American Horror Story Delicate.

But Anna’s image isn’t the only thing she’s worried about. Her mother-in-law has invaded their New York apartment. She’s been staying there. And she isn’t there to support her son and daughter-in-law through their miscarriage. No, she wants Dex’s help suing her ex-husband. Because she believes that, wait for it, he Satanically abused her. And she only knows about it now because of repressed memory therapy.

So, you know, she’s suing him. She’s also not exactly thrilled with the idea of Anna having a baby, referring to a baby as an accessory.

She said this to her son. Her baby.

Too bad she isn’t on board, because it turns out that Anna was right. She is still pregnant. After browbeating Dex and Dr. Hill, she’s finally given another sonogram. And there it is, a heartbeat.

By the way, yes vanishing twin syndrome is a thing.

But is it the beat of a human child’s heart? I don’t think we can safely assume that.

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What Worked

Let’s start with Dex’s mom, Virginia, played by Debra Monk. She is frankly everyone’s worst idea of a mother-in-law. And in interacting with her, we finally see Dex stand up for Anna a little bit. We see a side of him that is, if not exactly likable, sympathetic. I feel bad for him. He was never shown what a healthy relationship looked like in his childhood. And his mother’s still dragging him into her twisted drama as an adult.

I still don’t like him.

Matt Czuchry in American Horror Story Delicate.

Then, there was that cringy my body reel. This was done perfectly. The video comes off as unrealistic, inauthentic, and gross. Every woman included in this video celebrating women’s bodies was thin, beautiful, and cisgender. The whole thing came off TERF’y in my opinion.

That was the point! It was supposed to be gross, exploitative bullshit because it’s another example of how Anna still isn’t allowed to make her own decisions about her body and how she’s represented. It’s also a perfect parody of how modern society pretends to care about women’s issues while having only the barest idea of what those issues might be.

It’s almost as bad as giving a Pepsi to a cop during a protest and stopping racism. Who would agree to do an ad like that?

Also, I don’t know if Ashley and Ashleigh are supposed to be a reference to the Ashleys from Recess, but I can hope.

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A still from Disney's Recess.

Finally, let’s talk about the gross-out factor in this episode. Because it was strong! We’ve seen a lot of blood this season, which is fine. But the raccoon incident was next level. It was horrific and made even seasoned horror fans cringe.

I hope no one had spaghetti for dinner last night, Killer Queens.

If a piece of horror content has nothing going for it but the gore factor, it fails. But, if there are no gross-out moments, it’s hard to say it’s part of the genre at all. This episode of American Horror Story found a happy medium. Placing several well-done moments of blood and grossness among scenes of beautiful people and beautiful places. Like a maggot in a dish of delicious food.

What didn’t work

Now, let’s talk about another gross scene that didn’t work out as well. Siobhan and Hamish’s bedroom scene was awful.

I mean, the acting was fine I guess. But the whole concept of the two of them sleeping together for some sort of career gain was upsetting.

Here’s the part that upset me the most about this situation. There is a strong insinuation in this scene that Anna’s breakout movie was a breakout because Siobhan orchestrated it. That Anna’s sudden rise had nothing to do with her being talented. That she’s simply chosen as a pawn in whatever game Siobhan is playing. And I hate that.

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I hate that once again, Anna doesn’t belong to herself.

There’s just one episode left in part one of American Horror Story Delicate. I don’t at this point know the launch date for part two, only that it’s going to be sometime in 2024. So at this point, there are a lot of questions without answers. And I’m sure next week’s mid-season finale will only give us more.

5 out of 5 stars (5 / 5)

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Movies n TV

American Horror Stories, The Thing Under The Bed

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We’ve reached the final episode of American Horror Stories, season three. After the ups and downs of the season, I didn’t know what to expect. I felt that we were due a big finish, Killer Queens. But I feared we were in for a big letdown.

As it turns out, The Thing Under The Bed was neither.

The story

We begin our story with a little girl named Mary, who is scared of something under her bed. She sneaks out of her room, only to be caught by her father and sent back to sleep. And of course, there is something horrible waiting for her under her bed.

Debby Ryan in American Horror Stories.

This scene cuts away to a woman named Jillian. She has strange dreams, including one about Mary. But her husband, Mark, doesn’t want to hear about it. He’s only interested in a little lovemaking because he wants a baby. Jillian doesn’t, which makes total sense because she’s already married to one. But her irritation with her childish husband goes away when he goes away. And by goes away, I mean he’s sloppily devoured by something vicious under their bed.

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What worked

In short, this episode just worked. The acting was professional and believable. The cinematography and lighting work were wonderful, adding spooky effects and startling moments without impairing visibility.

Best of all, the story was solid. There were no plotholes to be found. Our main character, Jillian, was relatable and sympathetic.

This was maybe my favorite part of the story. I thought Jillian was a remarkably sympathetic character. She was dealt a hand she never asked for, having her husband slaughtered in their bedroom. I don’t think she missed him, so much as she was afraid of the legal ramifications of being caught with literal blood on her hands.

Then, when it would have been safest for her to just lay low and save up for a good defense attorney, she instead goes into unlikely hero mode. She does her best to save people, putting herself in legal and physical danger. It’s hard not to root for her.

It’s also a little hard not to root for the antagonist, too. I don’t want to ruin the twist for you, so I’m going to tread lightly here. But it’s great when you have an antagonist who might be off their rocker, but also maybe has a point.

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What didn’t work

I can only really think of one complaint with this episode. And that is how frequently one character says the word Chickadee. And if you’ve seen the episode, you know what I am talking about.

I get it, he has a pet name for his daughter. It’s adorable. It’s meant to convey that the two of them have a healthy loving relationship and I get it. We all get it. Blind monks get it. But the fact remains that no parent on Earth calls their kid by their pet name every single time they speak an individual sentence to them. It was just too damn much.

All in all, this was a good episode. It was a classic story, turned on its head, told by professionals from start to finish. And I hope that if there is another season, we see more stories like this one. But after the efforts put into this season at large, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the last we see of American Horror Stories.

4 out of 5 stars (4 / 5)

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American Horror Stories, Leprechaun

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If you’ve watched enough short-form horror anthology shows, you’ll notice that some stories are mainstays. Each show seems to put on the same sort of episodes, with the occasional surprising storyline that we’ve never (or at least rarely) seen before.

Leprechaun was an example of a repeated story—the story of a greedy thief whose punishment far outweighs the crime.

The story

We begin our story in 1841, with a drunk man leaving the bar one late night. He’s distracted by something glowing at the end of the well. When he reaches down for the glowing thing, he falls in. Moments later, he screams.

We then cut to the modern day. The well is still there, and now it’s surrounded by a dying town. In this town lives a young man named Colin. He’s married, his wife is pregnant, and he’s out of work. Like many of his friends.

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Hudson Oz in American Horror Stories Leprechaun.

Desperate for cash, Colin and his friends decide to rob a bank. They put together an Equate version of Ocean’s Eleven, and break in one night. But, of course, they find that the gold is nothing more than bait. And the creature waiting for them is something they never expected.

What worked

The first thing I want to point out is how real this episode felt. At least to anyone currently living in the same small town they grew up in. These characters felt like guys I went to school with. Guys I would see at the bar.

I appreciated the real anger and frustration these characters are feeling. Especially Colin. He’s bitter, and maybe he has a right to be. He did exactly what he was supposed to do to succeed. He went to school and invested in his career, and yet now he’s out of work and struggling to support his family. I probably don’t need to tell you how that feels. Because of this, we can all kind of understand why he was tempted to rob a bank.

I also want to talk about the fact that this was, as I said, an often-explored story. That can be a bad thing, but it can also be a good thing. This story is told over and over because it’s a good story. A relatable story. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

What didn’t work

That being said, this version didn’t try to do much to break out of the mold.

Because we have seen this story so many times, most of us could tell the story themselves. I would have expected something new, or some twist. But, in the end, the story didn’t bring anything new to the discussion.

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Maybe because of this, the ending left a lot to be desired. Trapped in the basement of the bank, everyone just sort of stares at everyone else, until the thieves give up. And that’s it. The ending wasn’t scary, shocking, or funny. It was just sad, on multiple levels.

Overall, this was an okay story. It was entertaining, if not surprising. I would compare this episode to homemade macaroni and cheese. Everyone’s got their own version, they’re all pretty good, and none of them are exciting.

There’s just one episode left in this season of American Horror Stories. Let’s hope they’ve saved the best for last.

3.5 out of 5 stars (3.5 / 5)

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American Horror Stories, X

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It happened. It finally happened. We got another good episode of American Horror Stories.

The story

We begin our story late at night, with a hospital security guard named Malcolm. He is frightened one night when he sees a woman with a distorted face in the hospital parking lot.

We then joined an RN named Claire. She’s doing her best to explain to a struggling mother that the hospital will not be able to treat her son with cancer because she can’t afford the treatment.

Mia Isaac in American Horror Stories.

Not like she’s happy about it.

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Fortunately, Dr. Nostrum, played by the legend Henry Winkler, swoops in at the last moment to tell the mother that her son qualifies for a special place in his cancer treatment clinic.

Claire is lamenting the fact that she became an RN to help people, but it feels like she isn’t doing anything good. Then, she and her friend Lilly stumble upon the same woman who menaced Malcom the night before.

While Claire is trying to figure out what’s wrong with this woman, she brutally slaughters an orderly and vanishes into the hospital. But not before struggling to say two words to Claire. Ward X.

What worked

I want to start by praising the effects of this episode. Because they were fantastic. Aided by the black and white filming, the bloody and distorted faces of Alice and her fellow victims are nightmarish. They look like a horrific version of Lockjaw taken to a terrifying extreme.

I also want to discuss the fantastic work of Henry Winkler. He is an absolute legend and never has a bad project.

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Henry Winkler and Mia Isaac in American Horror Stories.

Winkler’s character in this episode was exactly what we’d expect from him. He seems genuinely warm and kind, concerned about others’ well-being. Even when he’s planning to kill Claire, he comes off as such a caring guy.

Finally, I want to talk about the historical significance of this story. Because, like I always say, the scariest stories are the ones based on truth. And I’m sorry to say, this story has a basis in truth.

Mankind has a dark and twisted history when it comes to medical advances. Most doctors and scientists are good, moral people who abide by the first line of the Hippocratic oath, to first do no harm. Some, historically, are little more than monsters in white coats. Consider the Tuskegee Experiment, Unit 731, and the horrific acts of Josef Mengele. If you’re going to look up that middle one, be warned that it is NSFL.

While this episode of American Horror Stories was a work of fiction, it wasn’t that far off. I don’t think many of us want to admit how close to real life it was. This is the gift of good horror, to force us to come face to face with the worst aspects of humanity. To acknowledge them, accept them, and change them.

All in all, this was a perfect episode. The acting, the effects and the story were all top-shelf. And it’s certainly a story that will stick with you.

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There are just two episodes left in this season of American Horror Stories. Let’s hope that they reach closer to the quality of X, and away from the dull and dismal episodes that began the second half of this season.

5 out of 5 stars (5 / 5)

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