Watching Sabrina the Teenage Witch, as a modern witch
Witchcraft has always been a go-to for creatives. Books, movies, TV shows, songs and even comic books have included depictions of witches going back to Grendel and Lilith.
In modern times, witches still have a strong foothold in our cultural zeitgeist. We cannot get enough of women in pointy hats, brooms, cauldrons and black cats.
Of course, all of this love for the fictional witch ignores the fact that there are very real witches still around today. You probably know someone who identifies as a witch. And if you don’t, you do now.
I am a modern, practicing witch. When I was growing up in a religion that didn’t allow playing cards or women to wear pants in church, my only real outlet for my witchy interests was the myriad fictional depictions of witches I saw around me. Oh, how I loved them.
That being said, learning more about real witchcraft has changed how I feel about a lot of fictional witchy depictions. Sometimes I like them more. Sometimes I like them much, much less. As if I could have liked the Chilling Adventures of Sabrina less.
So today, we’re starting a series of classic reviews covering witches in modern fiction. We’re going to take a look at what these shows got right about witchcraft, and what they got laughably wrong.
Speaking of laughing, we’re starting with the lighthearted Sabrina The Teenage Witch.
Just the facts
Running for seven seasons from 1996 to 2003, Sabrina the Teenage Witch was based on the much longer-running comic series. It starred Melissa Joan Hart, had a laugh track, and was just the pinnacle of a bad but enjoyable nineties sitcom. The story revolves around Sabrina Spellman, a teenager who just found out that she is a witch. Together with her aunts, Hilda and Zelda, and a wisecracking warlock turned cat named Salem, she experiences the nefarious world of a high school student while trying to learn about her new fantastic powers.
Sabrina the Teenage Witch is a fun show if you need something bright, cheerful and happy. It’s funny, sometimes not on purpose, and has an array of enjoyable characters. The magic is wildly out of the bounds of reality. The only real limitation seems to be the arbitrary (and often plot device-heavy) rules from the Witch’s High Council.
What Sabrina got right
I’m never going to suggest that the witchcraft in Sabrina the Teenage Witch is realistic. Honestly, if someone tells you they can turn you into a pineapple, they’re probably messing with you. But yes, there are some realistic aspects to the way witchcraft is portrayed. And lots to appreciate.
For starters, I appreciate the inclusion of male witches. Sabrina’s father is a witch, and of course, so is Salem. Men who practice witchcraft are often overlooked, or dismissed. So the inclusion of a main character who’s a male witch (even if he is in cat form) was nice.
Another thing I liked was Sabrina’s response the first time her aunts tell her she’s a witch. She laughs it off, thinking they’re a little weird. And honestly, unless you have some weird religious people around you, that’s the normal response. Some people in the community worry that people will judge them, and I get it. But the top response from most people is usually to say, “Oh cool,” and then change the subject.
Finally, there were some magical bits that Sabrina got right. For one thing, there is very little wand waving. And while some witches do use wands to direct energy, many of us just point our fingers. That was good to see.
I also liked the acknowledgment that more witches mean more energy for a spell. Anytime you can rope some friends into doing a spell with you, it’s gonna have more oomph. And sometimes you need that. It’s like moving furniture. You can probably move an end table by yourself. But moving a couch might take a couple of guys.
What Sabrina got wrong
All that being said, of course, Sabrina didn’t get everything right. And I’m not talking about the wild things that aren’t realistic. I’m not going to rebuke the show because no one actually levitates.
But I don’t like the fact that it never seems to cost any of the witches anything to cast a spell. They throw around their powers as though it takes no energy at all to do so.
Magic takes energy. It has a price. Sometimes it’s a small one, sometimes it’s not. Going back to that analogy about moving furniture, if you’re trying to move something too heavy alone and without the proper tools, you’re apt to pull a muscle. Sabrina is just learning about her powers. Using them should make her tired. It could cause a headache, illness, or just the need to sit down and drink a cup of tea.
My biggest pet peeve, though, is the thought that someone has to be born a witch. This is something anyone can do if they want to. And while hereditary witches might have a leg up on those of us who had to figure everything out for ourselves, anyone can be a witch. Anyone, at any time, can start researching and learning about witchcraft.
All in all, Sabrina the Teenage Witch is a fun show with some surprisingly accurate and forward-thinking witchy notions. If you managed to sidestep it so far, consider giving it a watch. I doubt you’ll be disappointed.
If you want to see more of this series, or if you have a piece of witch fiction that you’d like me to review, let me know in the comments.
(4 / 5)
With Season Two of Ann Rice’s Mayfair Witches coming out sometime later this year, I thought it was time for me to check it out. Though I’ve never been a big Ann Rice fan, I thought for sure that a story about witchcraft would be something different. Perhaps it would be less dull, less dramatic, and a bit more fun.
It was not
Just the facts
Released in January of 2023 on AMC, Mayfair Witches is based on the Ann Rice series, Lives of the Mayfair Witches. It follows the tale of Rowan Fielding. Adopted as a baby, Rowan discovers that she’s the heir to a powerful witch family. She’s eventually lured to New Orleans, where she learns more about her forgotten family and the secrets that she’s already a part of.
What Mayfair Witches got right
The first thing that I noticed about the show is the key necklace that several characters wear and carry throughout the show. I appreciated that. For those who don’t know, a key is one of the symbols of a deity known as Hekate. This is a goddess many witches hold a lot of fondness for, as She is considered the goddess of witches, among other things. So I liked seeing her represented.
I also liked that so much of this first season was set in New Orleans. There are many places in America that are strong in witch history and lore, but few are as well known for it as New Orleans. So they got that much right, at least.
What Mayfair Witches got wrong
Unfortunately, that was about all there was to enjoy about Mayfair Witches. I honestly struggled to get through it, if I’m being totally honest.
First, as I’ve mentioned before, witchcraft is not something that must be passed down from parent to child. While your ancestry can play a role in your magic, if you want it to, it’s not the only or even the most important factor. I am the first witch in my family, and I do just fine.
My second complaint is also a complaint about the show in general. Mayfair Witches is not a joyful show. It’s not a funny show. It is a show that takes itself very seriously as it talks about very serious things without a spark of levity or joy anywhere to be seen. Even the party scene in the first episode, The Witching Hour, seems more ominous than fun. No one seems like they’re having a good time. Rather, they all seem like they’re trying very hard to look like they’re having a good time.
This is a problem I have with Rice’s work in general, but it’s especially insulting when we’re talking about witchcraft. Witchcraft is joyful. It’s warm. It’s fiery and passionate. Sometimes it’s serious ritual work, but it’s also laughing when your tarot cards roast you. It’s getting together with friends over the sabbats and sharing good food. It’s making a tea with a spell whispered into it. It’s protecting and providing for yourself and those you love.
There was none of that in Mayfair Witches. There is no joy, or warmth, or giving oneself space and tools for healing. There is no happiness here. And that’s just not witchcraft to me.
Nor, frankly, is it entertaining television.
Finally, I have one last bone to pick with this show. It’s made clear during this season that Rowan has no choice about being a witch. But that’s the opposite of the whole point of witchcraft.
Being a witch is a choice like I said in my Supernatural review. You are not, cannot be a witch unless you decide that you are. No bloodline or initiation is more important to your craft than saying publicly or privately that you are a witch.
In the end, I can’t in good faith recommend Mayfair Witches to you. It’s dull, it takes itself too seriously, and it’s a rather grim depiction of magic in general. If you enjoyed it, I’m happy for you. But as for me, I’ll give it a pass. There are far more interesting stories being told.
(1.5 / 5)
Featuring Shannon LeGro and author Aaron Deese, Dogman Territory: Werewolves in The Land Between the Lakes follows the pair in search of what many believe to be a real-world monster. Small Town Monsters investigates one of the darkest urban legends in North American history.
Well, even though this screener is late by…(checks watch) a few months, that doesn’t mean that I don’t have anything to say about it. That is to say, I DO have something to say about this new edition about dogman cryptids by STM.
So, welcome to another episode of ‘Brannyk talks about Small Town Monsters’! We’ve explored the Joisey Devil, aliens giving boo boos to cows, totally Bigfoot, a big ol’ stinky doggo, your tea-spilling ghost-witch, an alien Bigfoot with a hankering for a good peanut butter sandwich, Cowboy Werewolves, ‘The STM Which Will Not Be Named‘, and Native skinwalking creeps. We have a new screener from Small Town Monsters.
Plot of Dogman Territory: Werewolves in The Land Between the Lakes
We follow Aaron Deese on his quest to find out the mystery of the massacre that happened at the Land Between the Lakes, a recreational area bordering on Kentucky and Tennessee.
With Shannon LeGro by his side, the two investigate the strange encounters locals have reported. Gathering modern day and older accounts of super stinky dogmen, Deese ventures deeper into the lore and history of the site to see is there’s any truth to the massacre accounted there or if they’re all just campfire stories…
Thoughts on Werewolves in The Land Between the Lakes:
Nope. The “massacre” accounts are completely bogus third-rate creepy pasta stories. The one guy that they found from the internet won’t even be interviewed on camera and has…lacking testimony, and I say that generously.
Thankfully, Deese gets right to it and even he himself seems disappointed by what he discovers. And he just kind of blows past it, not really spending much time on the whole “massacre”. It’s a smart move and I appreciated it because instead of draaaaawing it out, he chose instead to focus on what matters – the locals and the history.
And, as always, with Breedlove at the helm, the historical facts of this recreation area are highlighted, such as the area being designated a recreation area by President Kennedy and the Tennessee Valley Authority exercising imminent domain. By this action, approximately 800 families were displaced from their land, causing protests and outrage by some of the families. Shining a light on a history that most don’t realize or possibly have forgotten.
And one last thought: this sewer-juice-smelling dogman is a massive dick. He, like, tries to kill you and then teleports out just for shits and giggles. Massive douche.
Brainroll Juice:
I’m not sure exactly why cryptid investigator Martin Grove became such a turning point for me in the documentary, but boy, he sure did. Martin is an absolute delight and I will bare-knuckle fight anyone who disagrees (I’m not saying that I’d win, keep that in mind, just that I would).
He’s just so genuine and curious that, even though I’m still a skeptic, I’d 100% go looking for a super smelly, translucent alien/demon dogman with him. You can tell that Martin Groves has no doubt in what he does and tries his very best to figure out the mystery behind the dogman between the Lakes. Often at his own expense and safety.
It was the Texas dogman STM that talked about people being depressed after they’ve had a cryptid experience, often finding themselves isolated from friends and family who just…don’t understand. They feel like people think they’re crazy and that they’re alone in their experiences and feelings. Many times becoming withdrawn and, well, traumatized.
Martin talks like he’s seeking proof just so people who had dogmen experiences don’t have to feel alone or crazy. That people can take comfort that what they saw is real and true. He’s standing up to that stanky-ass dogman and risking his own health by going into the creepy woods at night and searching for what he believes in.
And it doesn’t matter if you or I believe in a garbage-sludge, asshole dogman because what Martin is doing is beautiful. It’s the American dream. Believing in yourself and fighting for those who can’t.
And THAT is what Small Town Monsters is all about.
Bottomline:
If you’re here for the people and less for the dogmen, this is a great snapshot of the history and people of the region. Also, when is Martin Groves going to get his own paranormal show?
(3.5 / 5)
And now a word from Small Town Monsters
Dogman Territory: Werewolves in The Land Between the Lakes
Now Streaming Exclusively on Prime Video
Available on Blu/DVD from Small Town Monsters
Massilon, OH– Venture deep into the Land Between the Lakes as Small Town Monsters investigates one of the darkest urban legends in North American history. Featuring Shannon LeGro and author Aaron Deese, Dogman Territory: Werewolves in The Land Between the Lakes includes interviews with witnesses, researchers and long-time locals of the Tennessee and Kentucky borders, all in search of what many believe to be a real-world monster. Dogman Territory: Werewolves in The Land Between the Lakes is now available exclusively on Amazon Prime Video. A Blu-ray (SRP $19.99) and DVD (SRP ($14.99) will be available exclusively from the Small Town Monsters shop.
Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3w3T8ZFUhck
Supernatural is not strictly a show about witchcraft. Or, is it?
Sam, Dean and John Winchester are not witches.
Or, are they? When you watch Supernatural as a modern witch, you realize that a lot of what the Winchester boys do during their battles to protect the world from monsters are things we do as part of our witchy routines.
Just the facts
Starting in 2005 and running until 2020 for fifteen seasons, Supernatural tells the stories of Sam and Dean Winchester as they protect the world from the forces of darkness. Together with a collection of human and otherworldly allies, they battle demons, ghosts, cryptids and all manner of horrifying dark creatures. It was one of many CW shows that delved into the darker side of the world before committing entirely to bad DC content.
What Supernatural got right
The first thing that jumps out when watching Supernatural is the metric ton of salt used in the show. Specifically, salt is used to protect against any number of ghastly things.
This is very familiar to any modern witch. We have so much salt. Black salt, red salt, blessed salt. Salt to cleanse, salt to banish, salt to protect. When I saw Dean and Sam with massive containers of kitchen salt, I felt like I’d found my people.
Then there is of course John Winchesters notebook. Or, dare I say, grimoire. This also felt familiar. And it’s one of the things I loved the most about Supernatural.
Look, we all want the big family grimoire with the lovely, flowing artwork and beautiful handwritten spells like in Charmed. But in reality, most grimoires look a lot more like the Winchester notebook, with sketches and notes shoved in and held in place with gum bands and paperclips. And while I’m not going to say that my grimoire has daring notes about demonic beings I’ve battled, it certainly has more quick sketches (mostly of plants) than it does beautiful calligraphy. This is supposed to be a useful document full of information we can reference quickly, not an art piece.
Longtime viewers of the show will point out that not only do the Winchesters not call themselves witches, but they often interact with witches. Sometimes as allies, and sometimes as enemies.
The witches in the show are pretty true to life. They are good and bad. They can be anyone, from any walks of life.
The witches use many tools modern practitioners use, including crystals, scrying mirrors and protection symbols. Honestly, they are pretty spot-on. Except for the spectacular TV magic they implement.
Finally, I want to discuss the question I asked at the start. Are the Winchesters witches?
No, they’re not. Because they don’t claim the title. Even if someone does magic, they’re not a witch unless they say they’re a witch. The whole point of witchcraft, after all, is personal power and personal choice.
What Supernatural got wrong
All of that being said, Supernatural was of course not a perfect depiction of witchcraft. For one thing, there is no grand coven of witches. I don’t think enough of us could agree on enough to create one.
But if we did, Stevie Nicks would be the Supreme.
Witches also don’t have to come from a long line of witches or be taught by other witches. Many of us are self-taught from books. And sadly, many of us live in communities where we might be the only witches around.
Thankfully, there are online communities from which to learn and grow. You don’t need to be a generational witch, or even have a close witch mentor. It’s a practice, and practice is all that’s required.
All in all, Supernatural is a fairly good example of modern witchcraft. The show might not be about witches, but it’s a great representation.
(4 / 5)
By the way, if you like this you might enjoy my haunted apartment novella, Quiet Apocalypse. The main character is a modern witch, and I share some real magic in this fictional story of an unexpected end of the world.
