Woe is the loneliest Number
The second episode of Tim Burton’s Wednesday is, sadly, not better than the first. Honestly, I’d say it’s worse. Honestly, I’m struggling to understand why this show was as popular as it was. It’s got an 8.1 average rating on IMD, so maybe I’m missing the charm. But we’re two episodes in, and I am less than charmed.
Wednesday is shocked when Rowan appears back at the school, after being sure that he was dead. But he’s quickly expelled and sent packing. Or, is he? We soon learn that there’s a doppelganger about, who might or might not be Principal Weems.
Wednesday’s investigations are waylaid by Enid, who needs her to participate in a school-wide boat race. When Wednesday sees it as an opportunity to one-up Bianca, she throws all of her creativity behind it.
Even so, she manages to find a book that she hopes might explain why Rowan thought she was going to kill everyone. This hope is confirmed when she has a vision in the woods of a girl that looks just like her with blond hair, telling her that she is the key.
Let’s start with the good that came from this episode. I will admit that I wasn’t expecting a doppelganger. I appreciate the involvement of the Principal. Or, is the Principal involved? It’s clear that someone who looked like her came out of the train station. But after all, if this mystery person could look like Rowan, they could just as easily look like Weems. Honestly, the only reason I think it’s her at this point was her reaction to Wednesday’s team winning that boating contest.
I also do enjoy the mystery of Wednesday’s visions. I want to know why people think she’s going to kill everyone. I want to know more about the mysterious girl in the woods. I want to know why she keeps getting these visions all over the place, and if someone is intentionally leading her to them. Or, trying and spectacularly failing to do the opposite. I’m having a lot of fun with that.
Now, for the bad. Let’s start with the antagonism between Wednesday and Bianca. They seem to hate each other. Does anyone know why? Is it because Bianca’s ex kind of likes Wednesday? Is it because Bianca beat Wednesday at fencing, then Wednesday knew more than her about botany? Those are rather dull and superficial reasons for even a school-age grudge.
Let’s compare this to a better example. Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter for example. When they first meet, Draco tips his hand right away. He’s a pompous, racist rich kid. Harry’s irritated by him right away, and so are the readers.
There’s none of this with Bianca. She seems like a fine person, who just doesn’t like Wednesday for some reason. She’s not selfish, or cruel. She seems to be worried about Rowan. So, why are we supposed to cheer when Wednesday beats her?
Maybe because she’s the only person in the school who seems to have a problem with Wednesday? This was another thing that bothered me. Through the first two episodes, a lot of noise has been made about Wednesday being an outcast. She’s an outcast, I swear! Even though her fellow students are accepting of her. Even though her roommate is almost peeing on the floor at the thought of spending time with her. Even though boys seem to be throwing themselves at her. Look, if I had been that kind of outcast in high school, I might not have developed my sense of humor if you know what I mean.
Here’s my biggest complaint about Wednesday so far. There are many shows, like Stranger Things, Series of Unfortunate Events, and Avatar The Last Airbender that can be enjoyed by kids and adults. These shows can deal with some heavier topics and darker moments because they’re meant for both grown-ups and kids to watch. The original Addams Family comic strip was the same, as were the movies from my childhood.
Wednesday is not meant for adults. It’s a show meant for kids. And that’s fine. It’s not only acceptable but good for there to be things intended for children and teenagers to enjoy that their parents don’t like. And yes, these shows can deal with darker topics as well. Lord knows, in this dark world parents need all the help they can get explaining dark topics to their children. So I’m not complaining that Wednesday is a show for children that is going to deal with some dark topics.
My problem is that it wasn’t marketed that way. It was marketed as one of those shows that all ages would enjoy. It was marketed as something deeper than the source material. And it’s not. It’s superficial. It doesn’t have characters, it has caricatures. The dialog and problems are less complex than what would be found in an episode of Power Rangers. It is, frankly, just not that good. And Wednesday deserved better than that. Young people deserve better than that. The Addams Family fans deserve better than that.
Now, we’re only two episodes in. So maybe the show is going to pull off something special now that the characters are established. Maybe, just maybe, we’ll get something better than the poor reflection of much better content. But right now, I don’t see how that’s possible.
(2 / 5)
Episode two of Wheel of Time felt like the beginning of a long journey. Stories are unfolding, lives are changing, and blood is spilling.
Let’s discuss.
The story
We begin this episode in the past with Elayne’s mother, Queen Morgase. It turns out her rise to the throne was a bit, shall we say, cutthroat. So when she shows up at the White Tower, Siuan is concerned.
She might have reason to be, too.
Meanwhile, Rand, Egwene, Moiraine, Lan and Aviendha are in the Spine of The World. As they travel through some of the most breathtaking lands I have ever seen on a TV show, Egwene is plagued with nightmares. We think at first that’s just her trauma working itself through her system. But we soon find out that it might not be that straightforward.
Finally, Perrin returns home to heal after his hand is almost cut in half. But when he gets there he finds the town has been infested by Children of The Light. And they’re looking for him.
What worked
There was something heartwarming in this episode about political espionage and choking religious persecution. And that is Elayne’s relationship with her family.
I have consumed a lot of fantasy content with royal families. And I have never once heard a princess call her mother ‘Mum’. I’ve never seen royal siblings get along. And I have sure as hell never seen a princess have a good relationship with her step-parent.
This was refreshing. Even though Queen Morgase is kind of a horrible person she seems like a good mother. And that’s an unexpected delight.
Of course, this is just one storyline among many. And while this can sometimes be overwhelming, in this case it wasn’t.
I’ll be honest, some of these storylines are going to drag for me. I know this because I’ve read some of the Wheel of Time books and I have an idea that not all the characters exactly pique my interest.
No one likes all the characters. No one likes all the storylines. While I am here for the political espionage between Queen Morgase and Siuan, not everyone likes it. While others might be fascinated with Selene trying to win Rand back, I couldn’t care less.
Having multiple storylines keeps everyone’s attention better. So long as things don’t get out of hand. Things can easily get out of hand. But this seems to be managed well.
So far.
What didn’t work
As I mentioned above, I’m not thrilled with Rand’s story at this point. And while it’s fine to not like a storyline when there are this many to choose from, it’s not fantastic that the one I like the least is the one involving our two main characters. And anytime we were with the team at the Spine of The World, the only thing that brought me joy was Moirain’s hat. It reminded me of Stockard Channing’s hat in Practical Magic.
The problem is that Rand is Charlie Brown with controversial magical powers. He is boring, serious, and pessimistic.
And yes, I understand that he has a heavy emotional burden and he’s the Dragon Reborn and that’s quite taxing and all. But let’s be fair, there isn’t a single person in this show that doesn’t have a heavy burden. And most of them manage to be fun occasionally.
All that being said, this episode of Wheel of Time did exactly what it needed to do. It set up conflicts at each of the three locations. It established emotional ties between the characters and the events. And it established goals for everyone.
This was, in short, a solid episode. Not groundbreaking, not mind-blowing or life changing. It was simply good. It was entertaining and moved the plot forward.
Well done.
(3.5 / 5)
Wheel of Time is back for season three. There are mixed feelings regarding this. Last season, there were some serious pacing issues. And some serious sticking to the book’s storyline issues. But we’re two seasons in, and we don’t give up so easily. So let’s dive into episode one, To Race the Shadow.
By the way, I highly recommend watching this episode with the subtitles on. You’ll see why.
The story
We begin this episode with Liandrin facing a trial of sorts for her rampant betrayal. She does her best to gaslight her Aes Sedai sisters into thinking that Siuan Sanche is the real traitor.
When that doesn’t work, she reveals how many Black Aes Sedai have actually infiltrated the tower.
Spoiler, it’s a lot.
In the aftermath, our whole team gathers to drink and enjoy one night of relaxation before they head out to the Tear to form an army for Rand. All is going well until they’re attacked by myriad creatures and a sentient axe.
What worked
This episode was long. It had a run time of an hour and eleven minutes. And a lot of that run time was spent in heavy dialog scenes.
Fortunately, these were well-done scenes.
If you’re going to have a lot of talking scenes, there are good ways and bad ways to do it. Last season, we saw lots of examples of the bad way to do it. But this episode did it well. For one thing, other things were going on while conversations were taking place. The characters are drinking, playing games, walking through an interesting city. And the scenes themselves didn’t stretch out. They weren’t repetitive. We heard what the character had to say, then we moved on.
It was also nice that the point of these scenes wasn’t just info dumps. We had character development. We had romantic interactions. We had plot development and foreshadowing.
Overall, this episode felt like what it was. A moment of calm before a storm.
Taking a step back, I’d be remiss if I didn’t address the fight scene at the start of the episode. Because it was epic.
The magic looked amazing. The martial arts that went along with it looked fantastic. The costumes were beautiful. It was just incredibly fun to watch.
More than that, it was emotional. We lost some characters in that fight that were important. And it was clearly emotionally shattering for many of our characters, who found themselves betrayed by people they trusted.
So many of them.
It was a great way to open the season.
What didn’t work
Despite that, this episode wasn’t without its flaws.
First off, there were a lot of dialog scenes. And they were good scenes, as I’ve already discussed. But it was one after another after another. And when your episode is, again, an hour and eleven minutes, it’s maybe a little much to have so much chit-chat. Couldn’t some of these conversations, important as they were, have been moved to maybe another episode?
Finally, I want to talk about Egwene’s travel through the arches.
I feel like maybe there were some deleted scenes here. Because there must have been more to that visit than what we saw, right?
We could have seen Egwene battle Rand. That would have been badass and emotionally devastating. We could have seen her with a quiet life with Rand back home at the Two Rivers. We could have seen anything except for the quick clip of Rand in a bloody river, followed by Egwene being shoved back out in a bloody shift.
Bad job. But at least it wasn’t an extended scene of Moiraine collecting bathwater, and then taking a bath while looking sad. If we’d started this season with another scene like that, it might have broken my brain.
Amazon dropped the first three episodes at once. So we’ll be back soon to talk about episode two. See you then.
(4 / 5)
Early 2000s is a special era for the industry. It accepts the cheesiness and corniness of movie making, in turn producing some gems in their own right. Eight Legged Freaks starring David Arquette and young Scarlet Johanson is a horror comedy about giant spiders who overtake a small town. As crazy as that premise sounds, the movie surprisingly has a ton of heart and is super entertaining. Let’s review, shall we?
Plot
We start Eight Legged Freaks with a shot of toxic waste spilling into the water supply of Joshua, a spider farm owner. He is friends with Mike, one of our protagonists, who is a science geek and a spider enthusiast. Mike notices something quite right upon visiting Joshua, but no one takes him seriously. We are then introduced to the rest of the crew. Mike’s mother Samantha, the town sheriff, is too busy chasing Ashley, his sister, who is dating the town mayor’s son Bret (something Samantha does not approve of). We also have Chris, who returns to the town to save his father’s legacy in the town mines. He has opposition from Wade, Bret’s father, who wants to use the mines for his business ventures. Lots of drama going on that will only get juicier once the spiders get loose.
The creepy crawlies quickly dispose of Joshua and make their grand appearance after Ashley rejects Bret’s advances, abandoning him in the middle of a desert. A glorious chase sequence ensues as the spiders make their way towards the town, wreaking havoc on its residents. In a true horror fashion (which the movie acknowledges), it takes some convincing from Mike and then from Samantha for the town to take the threat seriously. The tongue-in-cheek style of narrative adds the comedy aspect to a movie that would otherwise burn out fairly quickly.
The remaining characters hide out in a shopping mall as it’s the only somewhat sturdy building in the area. This doesn’t last long as the spiders break in, forcing them to run through the mines. Their resources to fight the creepy crawlies off are limited as the methane gas doesn’t allow them to use firearms. Such conditions require resourceful thinking from Chris, who uses perfume to fend off the leader of the spider group and save himself during the climax of the movie.
Character dynamics are not forgotten once the action kicks in. We have Chris confessing his long-term feelings for Samantha which she knew all along, which provided some comedic relief. Bret also reunites with Ashley and apologises for being an asshole. Mike finally gets the appreciation he deserves as his knowledge saves the townsfolk more than once during the whole ordeal.
We end the movie with the town’s radio show person telling the story as an urban legend during his segment. This brings it into question – how much of it happened the way he said it did? We can only guess…
Overall thoughts
Eight Legged Freaks is a fun creature feature with some self-aware commentary on genre tropes that doesn’t take itself too seriously. The acting is good, the pacing fitting and the characters are likeable enough for you to want them to make it through. Definitely a must watch, if you don’t suffer from arachnophobia, that is.
(5 / 5)