Sitting alone in an empty theater on opening weekend wearing my N95 mask because I trust no one, not even myself, The New Mutants was the first movie I saw when theaters opened up again after the great lockdown. Nearly two months later watching it again, it may in fact be the last movie I get to see in theaters this year.
Maybe because this movie was the last in the era of 20th Century Fox X-Men movies, or because it was stuck in production hell for almost 3 years before finally being released at the height of a global pandemic, but given it’s cursed status having The New Mutants come out this year of all years seems oddly fitting.
A bear walks into an asylum. . .
The movie starts in a blizzard of chaos and confusion as our young protagonist, Danielle “Dani” Moonstar (Blu Hunt) is awakened in the middle of the night to some unknown terror ripping apart the reservation where her and her father live. Dani’s father hides her in a hollow tree right before he’s killed by the unseen force and his body unceremoniously dumped at Dani’s feet. Running in fear though the woods gets Dani knocked unconscious and when she awakens she’s cuffed to a hospital bed with a werewolf looking down on her, which isn’t nearly as scary as it sounds.
Dani is quickly introduced to her new doctor, Dr. Cecilia Reyes (Alice Braga) and her fellow mutant prisoners, I mean patients, Illyana Rasputin (Anya Taylor-Joy), Sam Guthrie (Charlie Heaton), Rahne Sinclair (Maisie Williams) and Roberto da Costa (Henry Zaga). Dani learns they’re all being kept at the hospital against their will for their own good, of course, until they can learn to control their powers.
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While Dani’s own powers are something of a mystery, it becomes quickly clear that all the teenage mutants have caused some sort of tragic death when their powers first manifested. While there is budding romance and a few instances of casual racism, in general there’s less of the typical teenage angst you would expect with a group of super powered teens left almost entirely up to their own devices. That might be because everyone comes with a pre-packaged traumatic backstory they’re busy trying to work though. The nightmare visions that start plaguing the teens when Dani arrives also keep everyone a bit too preoccupied for the usual teenage drama.
Will friendship help them to survive their prison? It’s an X-Men movie, what do you think?
Fear. Shame. Self Destruction.
A group of powerful teenage mutant killers trapped in a mental hospital with deadly powers they can’t fully control yet should be an awesome setup for a horror movie, right? Unfortunately, this one falls pretty short in the horror category, though it isn’t for lack of trying. The theatrical release poster at least is on point.
All the charred corpses, smiley faced Silent Hill-like monsters, undead priests, and cool looking nightmare demon bears didn’t help lend much in the way of a spooky atmosphere. If anything this movie should come with a slew of trigger warnings for suicide, child abuse, self harm, PTSD, etc., that should be the real horrors experienced by the teens, except that no weight is ever given to any of these issues. A character might be ready to jump to their death or having a panic attack because of past CSA one minute, and the next, they’re cutting through an army of Slendermen like nothing is wrong.
The movie leaves almost no time for grief or real reflection on the horrors they’re experiencing, and by that account, not much time for character growth either. The best parts of the movie are clearly the quiet moments between the characters when they get a chance to actually slow down for a night and talk about their pasts. It’s a shame too, because these characters and their backstories are interesting.
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Rahne probably gets the most fleshed out in terms of her personality since her mutant power (turning into an adorable werewolf), backstory, and sexuality is tied up with her religious upbringing. Her budding relationship with Dani is one of the few things that gives the movie a real heart, and it’s a great positive representation for young LGBT teens. Sam’s visible torment over the people he’s killed is another real moment of feeling in a movie that’s tonally all over the place, and Charlie Heaton (Stranger Things, Color Out of Space) does an amazing job with what little he’s given. Dani’s Native American heritage does play a part in her story, but mostly in a ‘there’s a Native American legend about this’ type of way.
Despite being a horror movie veteran at this point, Anya Taylor-Joy (The VVitch, Glass, Split, Thoroughbreds) through no fault of her own, fairs less well with the character of Illyana. Even though she’s supposed to be the crazy dangerous one, she mostly comes across as racist and bitchy to the point you wonder why the others bother to put up with her. Dr. Reyes is barely given a chance to have an emotion since she’s too busy delivering exposition, but for a mutant that creates force fields maybe that could be considered a personality trait. Still, it would have been nice to know if she really is a monster, or simply a product of the same circumstances Dani and the others find themselves in.
At the end of a very empty second viewing of the movie, it’s really the sense of missed potential that sticks with you more than anything else when leaving the theater after watching TheNew Mutants. Despite that, the movie does have a lot going for it. This is very much a female character driven movie; Dani, Rahne, Illyana and Dr. Reyes are the real forces that propel the plot forward. No offence to the very likeable Sam and Roberto, but they were just along for the ride. The casual, yet not at all subtle, chemistry between Dani and Rahne is such a nice change of pace from the forced heteronormativity of most horror, or pretty much any movie really, romances. That’s why this movie is, if nothing else, rated Horror LGBT Positive by me.
Final Girl Thoughts
While I would recommend seeing it for the interesting characters and all around good performances, you can probably wait the 2 weeks or so for it to come to VOD or Disney+ instead of risking your life by heading to the few remaining open theaters in the country to see it if you haven’t already. Enjoyable? Sure. Would I want to see these characters again under different circumstances that don’t involve a pandemic? Absolutely, although by the time they get a second movie out they may have to call it The Midlife Crisis Mutants. A solid 3 out of 5 Cthulhu. A good effort at something a little different.
Smile 2, a psychological supernatural horror, released in October 2024 just in time for Halloween, sees director Parker Finn (Smile, Laura Hasn’t Slept) return with a sequel starring Naomi Scott (Aladdin) as pop star and recovering addict Skye Riley. While Smile 2 boasts a talented cast, it ultimately falls short of its predecessor, offering a familiar storyline with minor variations and a predictable finale. The film attempts to introduce a new method to combat the parasitic ‘Smile Entity’, but this addition fails to elevate the sequel beyond a pale imitation of its chilling predecessor.
The Plot.
Smile 2 begins shortly after the end of the original; just six days after Rose Cotter’s death. During a short interlude scene, we watch as the now cursed Joel attempts to pass the Smile Entity on by killing one criminal in front of another. The plan backfires spectacularly, inadvertently passing the curse onto an innocent bystander named Lewis Fregoli.
The film then shifts gears, introducing Skye Riley, a singer and performer making a triumphant return to the spotlight with a comeback tour after a tumultuous past. During a candid interview on the Drew Barrymore Show, Skye opens up about her struggles with addiction and the devastating loss of her boyfriend in a car accident. Her sobriety journey, however, faces a severe setback when she seeks pain relief from her old high school friend, the unwitting Lewis Fregoli. In a chilling turn of events, Lewis takes his own life while Skye watches, passing the Smile Entity onto her. Unaware of her new cursed existence Skye gets on with rehearsing for her tour, but she begins to notice that strange things are happening. People are smiling at her in an unnatural way and she becomes the target of anonymous attacks and aggressions. When text messages begin to arrive from an unknown number, Skye decides to get some answers.
Highlights.
Let’s not beat about the bush. I found Smile 2 difficult to finish and was struggling at about the hour-and-a-half mark to stay awake. That being said it’s worth watching because everyone needs to see the 3-minute scene of the ‘smilers’ chasing Skye through her apartment. This was possibly the creepiest thing I’ve seen on a screen. The buildup, the synchronicity of the movement of the actors and their positioning, the camera work, and the lighting. I have rewatched it several times and it doesn’t get old. If you are only interested in watching this, fast forward to the 123-minute mark and get ready to be impressed.
Drawbacks.
Where do I start?
My primary concern with Smile 2 is its striking resemblance to its predecessor. The narrative follows a familiar pattern: an attractive woman fleeing a supernatural force, grappling with hallucinations, experiencing a mental health decline, and culminating in the revelation someone close to Skye was the Smiling Entity after all. This repetitive structure diminishes the film’s impact.
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While the introduction of a new method for shedding the entity initially offered a glimmer of hope this concept wasn’t fully realized. It just served to add names to the line of people that the entity has infected in the past.
Furthermore, the film’s pacing suffers from excessive focus on Skye’s musical career. Scenes showcasing her stage rehearsals and music videos, while intended to establish her identity as a performer, feel unnecessary and detract from the narrative momentum. Yes, we understand she’s a performer, you told us, you don’t need to prove it. These scenes appear to artificially inflate the film’s runtime, suggesting a lack of confidence in the core story.
The Final Take.
Ultimately, Smile 2 fails to expand upon the established lore of the franchise. The film’s conclusion feels contrived, with a blatant setup for a third installment. Hopefully, if a ‘Smile 3’ is inevitable, the creative team will bring fresh ideas and avoid simply retreading familiar ground.
We’re back again with Goosebumps The Vanishing, episode two. A story too big for one episode, apparently.
Or, maybe this is just a nod to the fact that Stay Out Of The Basement was a two-part episode in the original 1995 show. Either way, after seeing this episode, we could have kept it to one.
The story
We begin this second episode with Anthony investigating the parasitic plant taking over his body. Rather than, I don’t know, going to the hospital, he’s decided to phone a colleague and send her some samples from the bulb he pulls out of his arm with a handheld garden trowel.
Meanwhile, Devin is having his own worries. He’s haunted by what he saw in the sewers. So, he gets CJ to go with him to investigate. What they find is more of the tendrils of the plant that dragged him down through the manhole last episode.
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I sure would have liked to see more about that.
Instead, we see Devin pivot to flirting with a newly single Frankie. Because teenage hormones I guess.
Meanwhile, Trey is having a terrible day. First, his girlfriend leaves him. Then, Anthony breaks his car window.
Needing a way to deal with his frustration, Trey decides to break into the Brewers’ basement. There, he starts wrecking up the place. Until he meets the plant creature and has an unfortunate accident.
What worked
The big difference between this episode and the last is the increased gross-out factor. This episode had some straight-up cringy moments. From the tendrils waiving from Anthony’s arm to the whole goat he brings home to feed his new pet, this episode was skin-crawling gross in the best way possible.
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The series is called Goosebumps, after all.
What didn’t work
Unfortunately, that’s where my praise ends. This episode, unlike the last, just wasn’t that great.
To start with, there was a lot of unnecessary drama between characters who are not in danger of being eaten by a plant from the inside out.
I especially disliked the focus on the Frankie/Trey/Devin love triangle.
Now, I don’t hate it. This part of the story adds extra emotional depth to the show. We can see why Trey would be especially incensed by his girlfriend falling for the son of the neighbor he’s feuding with. But it would be more enjoyable if it wasn’t so cliche and dramatic.
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I hate the way Trey tried to gaslight Frankie. It makes me dislike him when he should be a sympathetic character. I hate how whiny Devin is every time he talks to Frankie. And I hated the impassioned speech Frankie gives after Devin asks her why she was with Trey.
Listen, I understand what we’re going for here. Devin and Cece are not struggling financially. They’re doing alright, and their new friends here in Gravesend are not. We kind of got that without Frankie claiming that her socioeconomic status is why she’s dating a bully and gaslighter. It felt out of place. It felt like pandering. It certainly didn’t feel like something an eighteen-year-old would say. I hated it.
Finally, there was a moment near the end of the episode that irritated me. I don’t want to give too much detail because I wouldn’t dare ruin an R.L. Stine cliffhanger. But, well, it doesn’t make a lot of sense.
I get that we’re watching a show about a carnivorous plant that is going to wreak havoc on this family and neighborhood. I understand the suspension of disbelief. Some might even say I am a little too generous with it. So I can buy into a teenager being absorbed by a plant and turned into a monstrous version of himself.
I can’t buy into what happens at the end of this episode. It doesn’t make sense with the rules established. It certainly doesn’t make any sort of scientific or logical sense. It is a lazy moment meant to further the storyline but threatens the structural integrity of the season.
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All in all, this wasn’t the best episode of Goosebumps. But it’s only the second episode. Honestly, the season has plenty of time to go either way.
The movie monsters always approach so slowly. Their stiff joints arcing in jerky, erratic movements While the camera pans to a wide-eyed scream. It takes forever for them to catch their victims.
Their stiff joints arcing in jerky, erratic movements As they awkwardly shamble towards their quarry – It takes forever for them to catch their victims. And yet no one ever seems to get away.
As they awkwardly shamble towards their quarry – Scenes shift, plot thickens, minutes tick by endlessly… And yet no one ever seems to get away. Seriously, how long does it take to make a break for it?
Scenes shift, plot thickens, minutes tick by endlessly… While the camera pans to a wide-eyed scream. Seriously, how long does it take to make a break for it? The movie monsters always approach so slowly.
Robot Dance from Jennifer Weigel’s Reversals series
So my father used to enjoy telling the story of Thriller Nite and how he’d scare his little sister, my aunt. One time they were watching the old Universal Studios Monsters version of The Mummy, and he pursued her at a snail’s pace down the hallway in Boris Karloff fashion. Both of them had drastically different versions of this tale, but essentially it was a true Thriller Nite moment. And the inspiration for this poem.