“With Fairy Godmothers like that, who needs wishes…”Cinderella
Fairy wands are all the rage. No self-respecting Fairy Godmother or Godfather can be without one. Their ability to conjure wishing magic is unrivaled. And we all know that wishing magic is always in high demand, worth far more than gold… So today, here on Haunted MTL’s Lighter Than Dark, we will tell you how to make them.
First, you will need to catch and kill a fairy. Wild fairies are crafty, conniving and dangerous-as-f**k. You can use fairies’ natural curiosity to get the better of them. I won’t offer any pointers here because fairies are tricksy and may be reading along with you, Dear Viewer, but Drew Hayes chronicles how terrifying fairy magic is in Second Hand Curses, and Brian Froud and Terry Gilliam offer some advice in Lady Cottington’s Pressed Fairy Book, both of which can be purchased using the links at the end of this article.
Once you have acquired a fairy, you will need to carefully remove its head. This is pretty easy. They actually just kind of pop off at the neck if you twist them right. Like everything else involving fairies, there’s a trick to this, but you get the hang of it pretty quick once you get in the business. Just try to keep as little of the magic from spilling out as you can while you do this; your fairy wands will be more potent the less of the fairy magic you waste and this will determine the number of charges your wand has (that being the number of wishes you can grant before it is spent).
Oh, I should have mentioned, you will need a suitable stick for a wand. Something that will hold the raw power of the fairy magic, feels good in hand, and is easy to twirl and twiddle (these actions are the basis for conjuring so you have to be sure that your stick isn’t too bulky or thorny or has too many branches unless they enhance this effect). The stick needs to be about the same circumference as the fairy’s neck. Not just any stick will do, but sticks are a dime a dozen so I know you can find a good one. Seriously that’s the easy part.
Next, you pop your fairy head on the end of your stick and let the magic seep into the stick itself. This process can take days for the fairy head to fuse to the stick and the magic to finish wicking. I typically let my fairy wands sit for about a week apiece. You will have to keep everything upright during this process by placing it in a vase or similar container.
Voila, now you have a fairy wand. You are now ready to enter the world of the Fairy Godparents, just be sure to enroll in your local chapter before you start using magic because they don’t take kindly to newcomers encroaching on their turf. I’d say it’s just proper protocol like joining any laborer’s union, but it’s really more like the mafia. Simply put, you don’t want to cross them, they will cut you.
Oh and here are those links, as promised. Remember if you buy anything from the links provided, Haunted MTL will get some money back, so the Dark Lord says shop away…