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Our first original! I am so glad to present Choking Instructions by Michael Carter. It’s a piece of fine flash and a very fitting first for the HauntedMTL Original series.
-Jim

Choking Instructions

by Michael Carter

            Running over that little girl as I raced through the intersection was a bad thing, but was it something I should die for?

            I was speeding; yes. The light turned yellow, and rather than risk T-boning someone, I hooked a rookie.

            And there she was standing on the corner, in her pigtails and green dress, in the wrong place at the wrong time. She was with the man in the blue blazer and fedora hat. I clipped the curb and ran over her foot. The light was dead red by the time I made the turn.

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            Her screams pierced through the roar of my engine and then the squeal of my brakes. When I approached, she looked up and said, “Why, why did you do this?” as she caressed her bleeding foot.

            The man in the fedora grabbed my shoulder. “You need to slow it down and follow the rules, like the rest of us,” he said as heat emitted from his hand. It burned through my jacket, collared shirt, and undershirt, to my skin.

            “Follow the rules,” he repeated as he pulled up the little girl while she continued to wail. Then they disappeared into the crowd that had encircled the scene.

            “Hey, wait,” I said. But they were gone.

#

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            The little girl in pigtails and green dress died that next week. It was all over the news. They said she formed a blood clot in her leg, and it caused a brain aneurysm. “Hit-And-Run Driver Kills Girl Downtown,” the headlines read.

            Wait a minute, I thought. I stopped, and the man left with the little girl.

            Or did I?

            I wasn’t entirely sure what happened. Speeding through town, the stress of the situation, the strange man in the fedora, what he had said to me, it was all too much.

            Had I left the scene without doing the right thing? If so, what was I supposed to do now?

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            Follow the rules and turn yourself in. That’s what I kept telling myself. But I couldn’t do it. Why should I ruin my life over a freak accident? The girl was gone. Turning myself in couldn’t bring her back.

#

            I lay catatonic in my bed the following day, paralyzed by what had happened and conflicted about my next steps. I thought about drinking. Instead, I just slept.

            I woke a half day later, hungry. I wasn’t in the mood for cooking, so I looked for something quick in the fridge. A package of hotdogs stared at me from the meat compartment drawer. Precooked and easy, I thought. They may be made of lips and assholes, but they’re protein, and they’ll keep me full.

            As I pulled a hotdog out of the plastic wrapper, I saw a flicker of wording above the list of ingredients, in bright-red letters: “Choking Instructions.”

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            I blinked and looked again, thinking I had misread a choking warning. Sure enough, it said what I thought it said.

            “Choking Instructions: For children under 4, cut hotdogs lengthwise and crosswise into small bite-sized pieces. Children should always be seated and supervised while eating. For adults, do not cut hotdogs into pieces. Instead, cram as many whole hotdogs into your mouth as you can. While chewing, pinch your nose shut and inhale deep gasps.”

            “Follow the rules . . . ,” I heard in my head as I stood in the kitchen holding that package of hotdogs. My skin started to burn where the man in the fedora had grabbed my shoulder.

            “Follow the rules . . . ,” I heard again.

            “Follow the rules . . . .”

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            I tried to look away, but I could not help but to stare at the choking instructions: “For adults, do not cut hotdogs into pieces. Instead, cram as many whole hotdogs into your mouth as you can.”

            And so I did. I followed the rules and crammed those rubbery meat sticks into my mouth. I kept cramming as my eyes watered and hotdog juice dripped to the kitchen floor. I crammed and crammed and chewed and punished myself like I knew I deserved. Then I grabbed my nose and sucked in air.

            I gasped and choked as pressure built under the skin of my face. When I stumbled, I released my nose. The smell of freshly chewed hotdogs burned into my nostrils as I inhaled.

            I fell to the cold tile of the kitchen floor and gasped for air, like a fish out of water. I reached for my throat and felt many Adam’s-apple-sized bulges.

            Then the tile warmed and the little girl in pigtails and green dress appeared in my kitchen. The man in the fedora was there, too. The tile became hot and seared my cheek as I lay on the floor. My shoulder and nose continued to burn as I choked.

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            The little girl and the man in the fedora stared at me. They smiled. I couldn’t be sure, but over my gasps, I think I heard the girl giggle. No, she cackled.

            That’s when I knew I had found my special place, right there on the kitchen floor, that I would never leave. I had found that special place reserved for people like me who don’t follow the simple rules of life and do the right thing.

            It is there that they will always smile at me, and she will always cackle. It is there that I think I will choke forever.

END

Picture of horror author Michael Carter. He is holding a Force be With You cup, which is cool as heck :)
Author, Michael Carter

Michael Carter is a short fiction and creative nonfiction writer from the Western United States. He’s also an attorney, a Space Camp alum, and a volcanic eruption survivor. When he’s not writing, he enjoys fly fishing and wandering remote wilderness areas of the Northern Rocky Mountains. He can be found online at michaelcarter.ink and @mcmichaelcarter.

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Book Reviews

Review: Don’t Eat the Pie, Monique Asher’s delicious trope fest.

“Real monsters are people, and I’ve seen them”

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Published in September 2024, Don’t Eat the Pie is a debut novel from author Monique Asher. Reminiscent of Rosemary’s Baby, this story delivers on so many tropes it is doubtful that anyone will not find something to like within its pages. It is not only tropes that Asher has gone to town with. Don’t Eat the Pie is also a mishmash of horror sub-genres that somehow works without being obvious. Southern gothic, supernatural, cult, body horror; it’s all served up here.

The Plot.

Newlyweds Sam and Ben’s idyllic honeymoon is cut short when Ben’s elderly mother, Nadine, suffers a fall. The couple and Sam’s teenage daughter, Emma, relocate to Ben’s childhood home to care for her.

Ben’s mother, lives on the exclusive Camillia Island. A secluded haven of wealth and privilege, accessible only by a creaky drawbridge. Things are smooth at first but both mother and daughter begin to notice some peculiar occurrences: mysterious men in pink shirts, overheard whispers, and a strange aftertaste from a seemingly innocent dessert.

As the days pass, the island’s tranquillity is shattered by increasingly bizarre events. The once-familiar landscape transforms transforms and the true identities of the island’s residents remain shrouded in secrecy. Sam and Emma find themselves entangled in a web of intrigue, questioning their own connection to the island’s dark past. As the stakes rise, Sam and Emma must uncover the truth about Camillia Island and its inhabitants before it’s too late.

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Highlights.

The way Asher has built this plot is genius. The abundance of tropes might leave readers assuming predictability. However, red herrings sprinkled throughout the chapters will leave you guessing but never quite certain who is friend and who is foe until the final chapters.

The way that Asher depicts the natural elements on Camillia Island is also worth mentioning as a highlight. Nature plays a big role in this plot and I confidently say that it is a character in its own right. It is not only the ubiquitous snakes and crows encroaching on the inhabited spaces that lend a sinister feeling.  The descriptions of the ocean surrounding the island, the vines and flowers that grow around the houses and even the scents permeating the breeze all combine to create a single force that drives the plot to its conclusion.

Drawbacks.

Don’t Eat the Pie is told through the alternating points of view of Samantha and her daughter Emma. This has become a popular way to narrate a story and I understand that it gives the writer a way to reveal information to the reader while still keeping specific characters in the dark. The problem is that if the voices are not distinct enough it can become confusing to differentiate who is telling the story, even if this is specified at the beginning of each chapter. This was the problem I encountered; Sam and Emma are so similar that I spent a lot of time turning back to the chapter headings to check who was telling the story at each point.

The Final Take.

I loved this story.

Don’t Eat the Pie has something for every horror reader. A Southern gothic, supernatural, occult, familicide, body horror… I could go on.

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This was so close to the 5 out of 5 rating. It only missed out due to the alternating points of view causing some confusion because they were too similar.

4.5 out of 5 stars (4.5 / 5)

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Book Reviews

Graveyard Shift, the new novella by M. L. Rio, was the 7 year wait worth it?

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After her 2017 debut novel, If We Were Villains, captivated readers and skyrocketed to Tik Tok fame readers have been holding their collective breath for anything from M. L. Rio. Seven years later we are presented with Graveyard Shift, another dark academic horror, though a novella this time around. The question is, was it worth the wait and why are readers split in their reactions to this story?

The Plot.

In the opening scene of Graveyard Shift readers encounter five people who often meet in a graveyard on smoke breaks from their various nocturnal jobs.

 On the night in question, they discover a freshly dug hole near where they regularly gather. This sounds unremarkable until they realize that no one has been interred in this graveyard for over one hundred years. With the mystery revealed each character returns to their night, each eager to find the purpose of the hole.

Highlights.

Writing a novella that includes the viewpoints of five main characters is a considerable feat. Despite allowing only two chapters for each character in the entire story M. L. Rio successfully juggles these viewpoints without dropping any balls. From the driven editor-in-chief Edie Wu to the enigmatic Tuck. Each character possesses a distinct voice and plays a crucial role in unraveling the mystery. Whether it’s the insomniac ride-share driver Hannah or the bartender at Rocker Box. Each character stands apart, making this novella a compelling read.

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Another highlight of this novella is that this is not just another horror novel claiming to be dark academia because it’s set in or near a university. This story is soaked in the academic and the dark side of medical research.

Drawbacks.

The length of this story really went against M. L. Rio, there was so much expectation and hype around its release that when the 100-odd-page story was delivered there were many sighs of disappointment.

And it is not just reader expectation that caused the length to work against her. It must be said that the complexity of the story and the depth that Rio goes to to set up each character would have benefited from being rounded out by another, let’s say 200 pages. The last chapters seem rushed and the ending is ambiguous to say the least, but not in a good way.

I read this on a Kindle and was confused by the story ending at 85%, then slightly angry that the remaining pages were filled by a playlist, an excerpt of If We Were Villains and cocktail recipes??? Although I usually enjoy this type of extra content in fiction, I think Rio’s time might have been better spent writing a few more chapters.

The Final Take.

I approached Graveyard Shift with high expectations, but was ultimately disappointed. While the novel’s form, with its focus on multiple perspectives, initially drew me in, the abrupt and unsatisfying conclusion left me wanting more. Presenting this story as a novella did not do justice to the characters of the story. The mystery of the empty grave was intriguing, and following each character through their nocturnal routines was enjoyable. However, the rushed ending undermined the overall experience.

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2 out of 5 stars (2 / 5)

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Book Reviews

HAVEN by Mia Dalia: a Book Review

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You can’t beat a good old haunted house story. One of the classic tropes of the genre, it allows for some old-school spooks while providing some character development. Now dress it up in a new generation suit and you get something completely different. How does Haven measure up as an addition to the trope? Let’s find out!

Plot

We start the story with a family of four headed on a month-long holiday at a distant relative’s mansion. We have Jeff, the ever-so-average husband, Jenna, the thriller-reading health nut wife. The kids are JJ, the loner gamer son with a passion for swimming, and Jessie, the social media addict with severe insecurities.

I would say that personally, their dynamic was the most interesting and promising part of the novel. It’s clear from the get-go that Jeff and Jenna are trying against all odds to preserve the American Dream. Except right away there is resentment bubbling underneath. Jeff is a pretentious asshole who thinks Jenna’s taste in books is inferior (as a domestic thriller fan I take great offence). Jenna wishes for him to have more career ambition so she can afford the lifestyle she wants. Safe to say there is barely any intimacy between the couple.

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When it comes to the kids, both JJ and Jessie feel like an extension of the worst traits of their parents. Jessie’s entire world is social media and her following. For JJ, he is arguably the character with the least development. His main traits are that he hates his family and can’t wait to move out. Oh, and the food.

This is something that I found more discomforting than the horror in the book. Both of the kids have severe food issues, with JJ overeating to the point of obesity while Jessie starves herself and has developed bulimia from the pressure to stay ‘perfect’. The horrifying thing is that neither of the parents notice these things about their kids or if they do, they choose to ignore it.

The haunting in this story is very family-focused. Missing things, Jenna’s harassment, Jeff’s seduction – all these things seem to be specifically catered to break whatever was left of this family unit. Not that it takes much to push them over the edge. This begs the question that whoever is haunting this place is methodical and feeds off their misery.

Gussie’s excerpts break up the pace but personally, I wasn’t as engaged with them as I was with the main story. That being said, I understand its necessity in order to develop the lore.

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Writing style

I would say one of my biggest gripes with Haven is not the story itself but rather the way it’s told. The writing style seems like it was trying to adapt to the new times and be tongue-in-cheek. This has varying degrees of success, with some genuinely good nuggets of writing scattered. However, some of it falls flat, especially in the beginning, with the characters doubling down on the points we already knew through the narrative.

Overall thoughts

Haven is a good effort at a haunted house story where there are scarier things than ghosts. It does a good job exploring family dynamics and dealing with negative emotions. The setting is also a strong point of the novel, the house and the forest surrounding it being quite immersive.

As I mentioned, for me the main negative was a bit too try-hard type of writing, although it got better as the book went on. I found the end to be a bit too soft for my liking but it fits with the story. Overall I would still recommend.

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3 out of 5 stars (3 / 5)

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