Dawn hid a yawn behind her hand, watching the mass of children clustered in the cafeteria. It was the last day of school before Christmas break. The kids were going nuts.
Connie, Dawn’s fellow fourth-grade teacher, slid next to her. “You don’t look like you’re in the Christmas spirit,” she said.
“Barb had trouble sleeping,” Dawn said.
“Married life. If one of you can’t sleep, neither can,” Connie nodded.
“For better or worse, and all that,” Dawn replied. No need to go into any more detail than that.
Barb had spent the night at the kitchen table, pouring over notes and newspaper clippings. “Those red gloves they found in the lifeguard station,” she’d muttered. “Why would someone have winter gloves at the pool?”
The first bell rang, and the kids spilled out into the halls. Dawn and Connie followed.
“Better not let these little monsters see you yawn,” Connie said. “If they sense weakness it’s all over.”
“Ugh. The only thing getting me through today is knowing there’s a two-week vacation and a bottle of wine on the other side.”
Connie laughed. She opened her classroom door. Sitting on her desk was a brightly wrapped gift.
“Who’s that from?” Dawn asked.
“Dunno,” Connie said.
Dawn’s students were grouping at her door. She left Connie to open her gift.
“Let’s put our things away and find our seats,” Dawn called.
If she was honest she was glad to be at school, with bright faces and paper snowmen. Anything to get her mind off Barb sitting at the kitchen table, scribbling like she was trying to solve the damned case by herself. But what else could she do? The bomb had taken Barb’s kid brother. It wasn’t something easily gotten over.
Something in the hallway caught Dawn’s eye. It was Connie, leaving her classroom. Some of her students were standing at the doorway, whispering.
Dawn went to the door. “What’s up?” she asked.
The girl shrugged. “Ms. Holland just walked out of the room.”
“There she is!” a student cried.
Dawn’s classroom windows looked out over the front of the school. Busses were still arriving. She spotted Connie walking out the front door, right into the road. She stepped off the curb in front of a bus.
The bus hit her. Dawn clapped a hand over her mouth. The students screamed. The bus squealed to a halt. Connie was laying in the middle of the road, not moving.
Dawn closed the windows before any more of the kids could see. “We’re going to go across the hall and sit with the other class,” she said. “Come on, right now. Stay away from the windows.”
“What happened?” a student asked.
“No questions right now,” Dawn said. Her hands were shaking. She saw the red package on the desk. It was laying on its side, contents spilling out. Inside was a note that said, thinking of you, in handwriting that Dawn recognized. The note was resting on top of a pair of red gloves.
Thinking of you, with the same loopy scrawls that usually made out Grab milk on your way home, love you.
Dawn grabbed the note and crumpled it in her hand.
Snails a Whorl Whirl Whore World…
So a friend and I made some artsy snails awhile back. Essentially this was in response to her granddaughter proclaiming that her favorite animals are whorl snails. My friend heard “whore snails” and was a bit perturbed that the child would use such a word so nonchalantly, whether or not she knew what it meant. But then again toddler-speak is like that sometimes… Anyway, it stuck.
So we made some whore snails, all glammed up and ready to go. We started with these flat metal snails and then painted and decorated them, to whore them up a bit. I figured this would be apropos after my recent Valentine’s Day posts and that the end results were horrifying enough to appear here.
This is my friend’s creation. I especially like the David Bowie star and cherry bling to match her cherry red lipstick. The purple shell is a great color on her too. I think my friend went back and decorated her shell more after the fact, but I didn’t see the snail after those changes.
And here’s my whore snail. She’s a bit more of an ice queen with her deceptively lovey-dovey eyes and mouth full of poison darts, like the underwater snails do. I believe I called her a Hoar Whore Whorl Snail as when the discussion first came up I heard “hoar” and thought of hoarfrost. Hence the ice queen take…
And another friend joined us via Zoom just to visit and have fun making art together.
This little Zoomed in snail is kinda cute, like she’s out on the beach in her bikini… Mixed media on paper.
So if that wasn’t disturbing enough, check out my inappropriate Shrinky Dinks posted here before, or maybe this Eye Candy Peeps Easter basket, both taking some innocuous thing(s) turning into something… else…
Have a Dystopian Girls on Film Valentine’s Day
So it’s finally actually Valentine’s Day, and thus marks the final segment of our dysfunctional dystopian romance. So far, we’ve survived both Gen X and Krampusnacht, what else could possibly be in store? Girls on Film…
Image description: Video camera umbrella shower succubus stares through the lens at the viewer, surrounded by eerie Cthulhoid horror embellishments with text.
Text reads: Happy Valentine’s Day; lipstick cherry all over the lens as she’s falling; give me shudders in a whisper; take me up ’til I’m shooting a star; (she’s more than a lady)
OK so this Valentine’s Day dystopia ends in a Duran Duran video, because of course it does. If the video doesn’t load properly, you can find it by following this link. Girls on Film.
Here’s the camera eye succubus all by itself, for your viewing pleasure. Actually this is the original original image from an Unselfie performance art piece in the shower before I decided to forego the umbrella. Girls on Film.
Krampus and Jennifer Weigel wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day
Krampus got a little confused and decided to celebrate Krampusnacht for St. Valentine instead of St. Nicholas. So Happy Valentine’s Day, as it were. No real surprise there, the whipping can go either way…
Here’s a before image of a doll like this one started as, one of those Christmas caroler figures.
And here are some after images to burn into your brain through your retinas.
Krampus’ eyes and horns are black light sensitive. The pin is a hand beaded piece that I lucked into at thrift and was perfect for this, nice and gaudy. Because even Krampus says you gotta have bling – it is Valentine’s Day after all.
And here’s a detail shot of the cape so you can see the chubby cheeky angels. Just like on all those Italian ceilings, these angels love to look down upon you in bed not sleeping, just like they would do. Such pervs. Perfect for creepy Christmas and Valentine’s Day alike…
If you want to check out more of my altered dolls, I have posted several to Haunted MTL here: