7 Ideas For Improving (or Gloriously Ruining) the Friday the 13th Franchise
Let’s just jump into it! Here are some interesting ideas for future installments in the Friday the 13th franchise. Obviously, I could have come up with 13 ideas, but I’m not a gimmicky bastard. I repeat: Here are 7 ideas, not 13. You’ll read them and you’ll like them, damn it.
1. Give Jason’s Mom More Screentime!
The original Friday the 13th film’s character of Mrs. Pamela Voorhees (Betsy Palmer) certainly made an impact. In fact, in that film, she was actually the big splash, with Jason largely being a mere ripple, or at most a dream. Still, an argument can be made that, perhaps, Jason has stolen the show a bit too much.
Sure, we have caught brief glimpses of Jason’s mom here and there, with her being played and voiced by different people in brief scenes (Marilyn Poucher, Paula Shaw, Nana Visitor, Kathleen Garrett, etc.), but Pamela Voorhees could probably return. Hey, if they put Jason in space, why not find creative ways to bring back his mom?
2. Expand on the Concepts In ‘Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday’ (1993)
Not everyone likes this movie, and it’s not too difficult to understand why. It definitely has some baffling moments and the Jason myth is expanded in some weird-ass ways. Still, this movie does have its fans, and there was a lot of “retconning” going on with this installment, leaving plenty of gaps between ideas in previous films and this one. Of course, Jason returned from Hell to fight Freddy Krueger, but even that could obviously be retconned.
The point is, this might be a bad idea, but some really adventurous writer might try to do a special follow-up to this story. In fact, this film has an odd moment with the Necronomicon, which I always assumed was somehow linked to Jason’s powers. Were Mr. and/or Mrs. Voorhees involved in “Evil Dead”-style spells, somehow invoking a special curse involving Jason? A film exploring this concept would probably be terrible, but there’s still something bold about someone willing to explore this greater Voorhees universe.
3. Humanizing Jason (and Piss Off Certain Fans?)
Yes, Jason has already been humanized at various points in the Friday the 13th franchise. In fact, in Part 2 he almost seems like an ordinary guy, and possibly even some deranged redneck. Also, in the 2009 reboot, Jason sort of went back to those roots, even setting up boobytraps and such. However, I like the idea of being bold, even if it might piss off the fans. I’m talking about an almost genre-defying, intelligent, deliberative Jason, who might even be capable of talking and stuff!
I know, I know, this will instantly piss off many fans. However, it’s not as crazy as you might think. In the first film, you know what is strongly implied several times? Jason could talk! Yes, I am not imagining things. Pamela Voorhees repeatedly flashes back to a young Jason calling out for help. Now, maybe she was being crazy and just fantasizing about Jason’s ability to speak, but I don’t know. She might have been crazy, but it seems like she wouldn’t randomly attribute speaking ability to her mute son. Also, if you think I’m full of shit, go ahead and remind yourself about this moment with this clip:
So, interestingly, when people tell you the filmmakers flopped in Jason Goes to Hell” for making Jason speak, you can actually correct them and say, “Well, actually, Jason had spoken before that” (you don’t have to say, in a stewing rage, “Jason actually cried for help, you ignorant sonofabitch!”) On that note, it would be interesting to witness the moment Jason vowed to make sure no one would survive Camp Crystal Lake ever again. While a talkative Jason might not represent the Jason most people know, smarty-pants fans like myself can have the added bonus of saying “Well, actually…”
4. Final Girls Team Up with Tommy Jarvis to Take on Jason
This one seems like a no-brainer, especially when more fans would be on board with it than some of the crappier ideas I’ve presented here. In the final encounter between Jason and these various survivors, who would doubt that Jason would have a serious fight on his hands? Hell, you could even through in a few new survivors, if you wish to keep things fresh. The potential seems inherent. Tommy Jarvis (Corey Feldman/John Shepherd/Thom Mathews) has sort of been the John Connor of the Friday the 13th franchise. At the very least, imagine if he teamed up with the series’ Carrie character, Tina Shepard (Lar Park Lincoln)!
5. A More Water-Based Jason
This idea isn’t entirely new. Obviously, Jason has spent plenty of time in the water. We’ve seen him jump out of the water, pull people under the water, emerge from the lake while clasping Fred Krueger’s (Robert Englund) severed head, and oddly get melted into a non-deformed little boy in swim trunks (Timothy Burr Mirkovich) by toxic waste. However, I think a daring writer could get even more creative with it. I mean obnoxiously and stupidly so.
What if Jason becomes more of a water elemental/ghost-like entity? Bad idea city, right? Maybe so, but it’s really no worse (and possibly better) than sending Jason Voorhees into goddamn outer space! The point is, the story element is already there, with Jason already around the lake hoping to drive the surviving campers out. Imagine if he wasn’t even trying to swim across to them, but basically was the water. It’s not so different from “Jason attacks from the water.” It also makes him more spectral. It may be a bad idea in most hands, but it seems like something that could work…but probably wouldn’t.
6. Jason Takes Manhattan…But More This Time?
I like Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan, but people often complain about it being “Jason on a boat” more than Jason in Manhattan. Obviously, the excuse for the limited time in Manhattan was a limited budget. While we do get some memorable NYC moments, it was not enough to pacify everyone. What if that were to change, and Jason was retconned back into Manhattan? Maybe they could have him be captured, much like they do in “Jason X,” and transported to a special research lab in Manhattan?
Hell, the remake could even have nods to the original. Maybe you could have Rennie (Jensen Daggett) return, just so Jason can take her under the water and try to drown her again. After all, such a premise could never get old, right? Maybe she got knocked on the head, received amnesia, and decides to go swimming to revitalize her memory…and then WHAMMO!, Jason’s got her by the leg and that old romantic just won’t let go! Then she breaks free and decides to go to Manhattan to see a broadway show and Jason, that old rapscallion, happened to score some tickets and is ready to join her there, too. (Obviously, I am making light of tragic situations, but you get the idea.)
7. The Psychological Angle
Remember Part 5, which doesn’t even have a real Jason in it? Of course, you do! By that point, it seemed some people were fine with leaving the actual Jason hacked up, at the bottom of the lake, or wherever. In fact, some people thought even the second Friday the 13th film was a bit out there. A drowned kid returning for revenge? How? Well, part of the reason parts 1, 2, and 5 sort of work is obvious: They all have a psychological angle to them, so people are less likely to sweat the small stuff like “Does this story and timeline really make sense?”
By applying just a bit of a psychological twist, one can make just about any idea seem somewhat deeper, even if only superficially. Hell, even Part 7 has some of that going on. The point is, some skilled craftsmen could perhaps get to work on a deeper, more psychologically rooted depiction of Jason Voorhees. Maybe it’s good to avoid stereotypical Freudian stuff, but who knows? Maybe that cigar isn’t just a cigar. There are plenty of bizarre, twisted twists and turns to be made here.
Also, with how polished and refined some people are trying to be nowadays, the climate is perhaps just right to (even lazily) deliver freakish shocks and remind people what deeply disturbing stuff is actually buried beneath that hockey mask. Was Jason abused as a child and made too psychologically dependent on his mother? There’s a little bit of room to explore there, in the dark corners of the Voorheesian revenge motif. Of course, you can always have Jason fight someone other than Freddy, like Mike Myers (and I don’t mean Austin Powers — though, after seeing Jason in space, having him actually fight Austin Powers wouldn’t be much of a stretch. After all, in “Jason X” he did literally take on a fembot).
What are your thoughts on this list? Would they help or ruin the Friday the 13th franchise? Wouldn’t you see these movies either way? Admit it: You probably would, you hapless fool! Jason has you by the non-literal balls and you don’t even want him to let go, do you?
Movies n TV
Wheel of Time A Question of Crimson Is a Political Espionage Delight
Episode two of Wheel of Time felt like the beginning of a long journey. Stories are unfolding, lives are changing, and blood is spilling.
Let’s discuss.
The story
We begin this episode in the past with Elayne’s mother, Queen Morgase. It turns out her rise to the throne was a bit, shall we say, cutthroat. So when she shows up at the White Tower, Siuan is concerned.
She might have reason to be, too.
Meanwhile, Rand, Egwene, Moiraine, Lan and Aviendha are in the Spine of The World. As they travel through some of the most breathtaking lands I have ever seen on a TV show, Egwene is plagued with nightmares. We think at first that’s just her trauma working itself through her system. But we soon find out that it might not be that straightforward.
Finally, Perrin returns home to heal after his hand is almost cut in half. But when he gets there he finds the town has been infested by Children of The Light. And they’re looking for him.
What worked
There was something heartwarming in this episode about political espionage and choking religious persecution. And that is Elayne’s relationship with her family.
I have consumed a lot of fantasy content with royal families. And I have never once heard a princess call her mother ‘Mum’. I’ve never seen royal siblings get along. And I have sure as hell never seen a princess have a good relationship with her step-parent.
This was refreshing. Even though Queen Morgase is kind of a horrible person she seems like a good mother. And that’s an unexpected delight.

Of course, this is just one storyline among many. And while this can sometimes be overwhelming, in this case it wasn’t.
I’ll be honest, some of these storylines are going to drag for me. I know this because I’ve read some of the Wheel of Time books and I have an idea that not all the characters exactly pique my interest.
No one likes all the characters. No one likes all the storylines. While I am here for the political espionage between Queen Morgase and Siuan, not everyone likes it. While others might be fascinated with Selene trying to win Rand back, I couldn’t care less.
Having multiple storylines keeps everyone’s attention better. So long as things don’t get out of hand. Things can easily get out of hand. But this seems to be managed well.
So far.
What didn’t work
As I mentioned above, I’m not thrilled with Rand’s story at this point. And while it’s fine to not like a storyline when there are this many to choose from, it’s not fantastic that the one I like the least is the one involving our two main characters. And anytime we were with the team at the Spine of The World, the only thing that brought me joy was Moirain’s hat. It reminded me of Stockard Channing’s hat in Practical Magic.
The problem is that Rand is Charlie Brown with controversial magical powers. He is boring, serious, and pessimistic.
And yes, I understand that he has a heavy emotional burden and he’s the Dragon Reborn and that’s quite taxing and all. But let’s be fair, there isn’t a single person in this show that doesn’t have a heavy burden. And most of them manage to be fun occasionally.

All that being said, this episode of Wheel of Time did exactly what it needed to do. It set up conflicts at each of the three locations. It established emotional ties between the characters and the events. And it established goals for everyone.
This was, in short, a solid episode. Not groundbreaking, not mind-blowing or life changing. It was simply good. It was entertaining and moved the plot forward.
Well done.
(3.5 / 5)
Movies n TV
Wheel of Time Returns With A Bang
Wheel of Time is back for season three. There are mixed feelings regarding this. Last season, there were some serious pacing issues. And some serious sticking to the book’s storyline issues. But we’re two seasons in, and we don’t give up so easily. So let’s dive into episode one, To Race the Shadow.
By the way, I highly recommend watching this episode with the subtitles on. You’ll see why.
The story
We begin this episode with Liandrin facing a trial of sorts for her rampant betrayal. She does her best to gaslight her Aes Sedai sisters into thinking that Siuan Sanche is the real traitor.

When that doesn’t work, she reveals how many Black Aes Sedai have actually infiltrated the tower.
Spoiler, it’s a lot.
In the aftermath, our whole team gathers to drink and enjoy one night of relaxation before they head out to the Tear to form an army for Rand. All is going well until they’re attacked by myriad creatures and a sentient axe.
What worked
This episode was long. It had a run time of an hour and eleven minutes. And a lot of that run time was spent in heavy dialog scenes.
Fortunately, these were well-done scenes.
If you’re going to have a lot of talking scenes, there are good ways and bad ways to do it. Last season, we saw lots of examples of the bad way to do it. But this episode did it well. For one thing, other things were going on while conversations were taking place. The characters are drinking, playing games, walking through an interesting city. And the scenes themselves didn’t stretch out. They weren’t repetitive. We heard what the character had to say, then we moved on.
It was also nice that the point of these scenes wasn’t just info dumps. We had character development. We had romantic interactions. We had plot development and foreshadowing.
Overall, this episode felt like what it was. A moment of calm before a storm.
Taking a step back, I’d be remiss if I didn’t address the fight scene at the start of the episode. Because it was epic.
The magic looked amazing. The martial arts that went along with it looked fantastic. The costumes were beautiful. It was just incredibly fun to watch.
More than that, it was emotional. We lost some characters in that fight that were important. And it was clearly emotionally shattering for many of our characters, who found themselves betrayed by people they trusted.
So many of them.
It was a great way to open the season.
What didn’t work
Despite that, this episode wasn’t without its flaws.
First off, there were a lot of dialog scenes. And they were good scenes, as I’ve already discussed. But it was one after another after another. And when your episode is, again, an hour and eleven minutes, it’s maybe a little much to have so much chit-chat. Couldn’t some of these conversations, important as they were, have been moved to maybe another episode?
Finally, I want to talk about Egwene’s travel through the arches.

I feel like maybe there were some deleted scenes here. Because there must have been more to that visit than what we saw, right?
We could have seen Egwene battle Rand. That would have been badass and emotionally devastating. We could have seen her with a quiet life with Rand back home at the Two Rivers. We could have seen anything except for the quick clip of Rand in a bloody river, followed by Egwene being shoved back out in a bloody shift.
Bad job. But at least it wasn’t an extended scene of Moiraine collecting bathwater, and then taking a bath while looking sad. If we’d started this season with another scene like that, it might have broken my brain.
Amazon dropped the first three episodes at once. So we’ll be back soon to talk about episode two. See you then.
(4 / 5)
Movies n TV
Entertaining as hell: Eight Legged Freaks (2002) Review
Early 2000s is a special era for the industry. It accepts the cheesiness and corniness of movie making, in turn producing some gems in their own right. Eight Legged Freaks starring David Arquette and young Scarlet Johanson is a horror comedy about giant spiders who overtake a small town. As crazy as that premise sounds, the movie surprisingly has a ton of heart and is super entertaining. Let’s review, shall we?
Plot
We start Eight Legged Freaks with a shot of toxic waste spilling into the water supply of Joshua, a spider farm owner. He is friends with Mike, one of our protagonists, who is a science geek and a spider enthusiast. Mike notices something quite right upon visiting Joshua, but no one takes him seriously. We are then introduced to the rest of the crew. Mike’s mother Samantha, the town sheriff, is too busy chasing Ashley, his sister, who is dating the town mayor’s son Bret (something Samantha does not approve of). We also have Chris, who returns to the town to save his father’s legacy in the town mines. He has opposition from Wade, Bret’s father, who wants to use the mines for his business ventures. Lots of drama going on that will only get juicier once the spiders get loose.
The creepy crawlies quickly dispose of Joshua and make their grand appearance after Ashley rejects Bret’s advances, abandoning him in the middle of a desert. A glorious chase sequence ensues as the spiders make their way towards the town, wreaking havoc on its residents. In a true horror fashion (which the movie acknowledges), it takes some convincing from Mike and then from Samantha for the town to take the threat seriously. The tongue-in-cheek style of narrative adds the comedy aspect to a movie that would otherwise burn out fairly quickly.
The remaining characters hide out in a shopping mall as it’s the only somewhat sturdy building in the area. This doesn’t last long as the spiders break in, forcing them to run through the mines. Their resources to fight the creepy crawlies off are limited as the methane gas doesn’t allow them to use firearms. Such conditions require resourceful thinking from Chris, who uses perfume to fend off the leader of the spider group and save himself during the climax of the movie.
Character dynamics are not forgotten once the action kicks in. We have Chris confessing his long-term feelings for Samantha which she knew all along, which provided some comedic relief. Bret also reunites with Ashley and apologises for being an asshole. Mike finally gets the appreciation he deserves as his knowledge saves the townsfolk more than once during the whole ordeal.
We end the movie with the town’s radio show person telling the story as an urban legend during his segment. This brings it into question – how much of it happened the way he said it did? We can only guess…
Overall thoughts
Eight Legged Freaks is a fun creature feature with some self-aware commentary on genre tropes that doesn’t take itself too seriously. The acting is good, the pacing fitting and the characters are likeable enough for you to want them to make it through. Definitely a must watch, if you don’t suffer from arachnophobia, that is.
(5 / 5)

Ashley
April 12, 2021 at 7:06 pm
Water elemental Jason is needed like yesterday. Go out! Go crazy. Worst case is you piss off fans (oh noooooooo) or you have something incredible.
Wade Wainio
April 23, 2021 at 1:17 pm
It would be interesting, and possibly even scary.