Weekly Wail: My Friday the 13th Reboot – Chapter Four: Camp Blood Forever
My apologies for this taking a bit. It’s been kind of strange during this time of the Coronavirus and patterns inevitably become disrupted. I finally found time to get some writing done for Haunted MTL (which I love doing, but this has not been a very productive month for me). Hopefully, you’ve already read the three prior outlines in this Friday the 13th reboot miniseries proposal. If you have not, I suggest you stop here and check them out: Chapter One: Camp Crystal Lake, Chapter Two: The Woman in the Woods, Chapter Three: The Crystal Lake Massacre.
I will outline the final chapter here, as well as a little writing about the choices I made in this reboot.
Let’s dive into Friday the 13th, Chapter Four: Camp Blood Forever.
Friday the 13th, Chapter Four: Camp Blood Forever
The episode begins with two counselors late at night enjoying the last dying embers of a fire. They were left behind to keep an eye on the kids while the rest of the counselors were out searching for the unfortunate victims of the previous episode. They’re somewhat nervous about what is going on, but they’re talking tough to psych themselves up.
Then Alice comes stumbling out of the woods, screaming and bloodied. Alice arrives at the camp in a panic and begins rousing counselors to evacuate the kids. The two counselors are confused and call Eddie Jarvis, who is already on his way. The counselors manage to hold off Alice from disturbing the kids who are sleeping until Eddie arrives and tries to defuse the situation.
Eddie has arrived with one of the Crystal Lake deputies. The deputy asks for Alice to make a report and Alice lets them have it. She talks about the dead counselors, Sheriff Savini, Ms. Voorhees, and the approaching Jason. Eddie and the deputy aren’t sure how to react.
Back in the woods, we watch as Jason makes his way toward the camp. He is sticking close enough to the road for a deputy to see him. The deputy pulls over and loses track of the gigantic Jason, only for Jason to almost supernaturally show up behind him and smash his face into a tree. Jason watches the body drop, stares at it for a moment, and pushes forward.
The deputy at camp makes a call to the others and finds out about the death of Savini, Cunningham, and Hodder as well as the dead Ms. Voorhees and the child from Crystal Lake. He asks for everyone to regroup at camp as something is on the way, believing Alice about Jason. Most of the counselors are still missing, so Eddie, Alice, and the remaining support staff start securing the kids and get ready to put them on the bus to leave camp.
It’s too late, however, as Jason has already arrived. Alice heads to one cabin to secure the kids, narrowly missing Jason who is heading another direction, not noticing her. Jason smashes into a counselor cabin and attacks one of the counselors who tries to defend himself with a hockey stick. Jason grabs the stick, snapping it, and repeatedly stabs the counselor with the broken end.
Eddie enters the cabin trying to see what the holdup is and is pinned to a wall by Jason’s ax. Eddie’s wild death motions knock down stuff off a shelf. Jason rips Eddie from the wall and kills him by crushing his eye sockets. Jason looks at his handiwork and lifts the sweater sleeve he is wearing as mask enough to eat some of Eddie’s blood.
He spies on a hockey mask on the floor and looks at it curiously.
Meanwhile, Alice is in the girls’ cabin getting them to pack up what they can into their bags. The deputy knocks, he tells her to get them to the bus. She gathers them and heads out the door. Screaming grabs her and the deputy’s attention and they see a group of boys fleeing a cabin. The deputy heads that direction and urges the kids to follow Alice.
Alice leads the kids to the bus but the driver is already dead. She tells them to get into the mess hall and hide. She manages to secure the building and has the kids hiding under the tables. She runs off to the kitchen and grabs the biggest knife she can find.
She crouches on the floor next to a group of kids but the sounds of screaming outside of the mess hall pierce the silence. Alice peeks over a table only to see the deputy’s body come crashing through a window. She begins to move toward it, but Jason steps into the frame and he is wearing the hockey mask.
Alice dives back out of sight and Jason peers into the darkened building, unable to see anything. He lifts his tremendous bulk through the frame and broke glass and begins walking around the mess in the dark. Alice gestures to the children to remain silent. Alice creeps around, hiding just out of sight as Jason wanders between the rows of tables and chairs. A child begins to whimper and Jason pauses. He looks around.
Alice quickly stands up and bolts for the window, shouting for Jason. He begins following her as she climbs out the window. She is out of the building when one of the kids accidentally scuffs a chair across the floor. Jason turns his attention back to the mess hall.
Alice realizes Jason isn’t following, so she climbs back into the window and sees that Jason has turned over one of the tables and is approaching a pair of cowering children. She screams and berserker-rushes him, jamming her knife deep into his back. He stumbles backward on top of her and she struggles to escape his weight as she screams for the children to run for a cabin and lock it. The kids unlock the mess hall door and stream out, screaming.
Alice manages to worm her way out from under Jason’s body and nearly escapes until his tremendous hand grabs her ankle and crushes it. Alice screams and kicks at his fingers. He finally lets go and a hobbled Alice limps out the door. Jason rises to his feet, snapping the knife out of his back.
Alice tumbles into the dirt in the common area and can barely walk. She doesn’t see the kids. She tries to put distance between herself and the mess hall, but it is virtually impossible. Jason stumbles out of the building and his masked face looks at her direction. He begins a slow walk toward her and pauses at a memorial pole in the common area; a wooden beam with a couple of placards. He rips it from the ground and approaches Alice.
Three cars come screeching into the camp area and six deputies draw their guns on Jason, who doesn’t seem to notice or care. He just wants Alice. They tell him to stop and drop the weapon, but he keeps walking toward the crawling woman. They open fire. Jason’s body is rocked by a hail of bullets and after a couple dozen shots he finally falls to the ground. Alice, unsure, keeps crawling as one of the deputies runs over to secure her. The others approach the apparently lifeless body of Jason Voorhees.
Jason, not dead, nor alive, really, snaps up and grabs a deputy’s leg, digging dirty, thick fingers deep into his thigh and dropping him. Jason begins to rise to his feet and any attempts by the deputies to bring him down simply results in their deaths. Alice screams as Jason approaches. The deputy next to her attempts to help her up and take her toward a car. Jason is gaining, however, so he tries to unload a clip into him. Jason simply grabs the gun and shoves it through the deputy’s skull.
Alice limps into the car and manages to drive it into Jason, who holds onto it, rather than simply bouncing off the hood. Alice screams and drives Jason and herself into one of the cabins. The crash is spectacular and Jason appears to be crushed between stone, tinder, and a car. Smoke is spilling from the car.
Alice blacks out.
She wakes up in a hospital surrounded by state police. They ask her what she remembers. She tells them the story and she asks if they found Jason, but they reveal there was no sign of him. They also reveal that the cabin she crashed into was where the children were hiding and that they are dead or missing.
About three years later we see Alice is in a mental hospital. She looks terrible and she is sitting across from an attorney who informs her that at this point all her appeals have failed. Her attorney leaves and she is taken to the activity room where she gets back to an art project… a paper mache hockey mask. She stares at it a moment and tears it in half, scowling.
Back at Crystal Lake, a young Tommy Jarvis, about 12 or 13 now, wanders around the abandoned Camp Crystal Lake. He enters the cabin where his father died. His memorializing is cut short by a van arriving at the campgrounds. He watches, hidden, in the cabin as a new group of people spill out of the van. They begin talking about what they could do with all of this land. Perhaps a resort?
Tommy slips out of the cabin as they approach and watches from around a corner. The camera pulls back in a long take as he listens to them. Further back now, the camera is in the woods. It gets darker.
The infamous Jason Voorhees riff plays.
The end.
Reasoning
So why did I go with the route I went? As I mentioned in my first post in this series, I do love Friday the 13th, but it is a nonsensical series. It was never really planned out and the fact that Jason doesn’t become a thing until the second movie just strikes me as bonkers. I feel that the series was ultimately successful in spite of itself because it delivered boobs, gore, and a great, imposing killer from the 3rd film on.
So, when I thought about how I would want to reboot the series, I had a couple of things I wanted to make sure I did:
- Have Pamela and Jason in the same story
- Bring in the hockey mask
- Establish Jason as supernatural right away
- Give Jason a reason to kill beyond simple vengeance or territoriality
- Actually kill some damn kids
Ultimately, I think I was successful in these regards, but your mileage may vary. I’d love to know what you thought of this series. My proposal is a mini-series for cable television, 4 episodes at around an hour and a half to two hours each. Would this be something you would watch? Does it respect the established series enough?
Eventually I would like to take this outline that was spread across four posts, pull them together, and edit them. I recognize there are elements I can probably establish earlier on and set up for later. That’s the challenge of writing these things piece by piece.
Anyway, have at me, folks. Let me know your thoughts and if you’d like for me to reboot any other horror classics.
We’ve reached the penultimate episode of Original Sin. This season has been a bloody delight so far, but of course, the endings usually ruin anything related to Dexter.
See the original series ending, book series ending and New Blood ending.
But so far this ending has been good. Let’s discuss.
The story
We begin this episode with the whole force worrying over Bobby, Harry’s partner. They decide to have a blood drive, which is a really good way to respond to a tragedy.
In a flashback scene, we see that Harry and Doris took in both boys. Doris is, by the way, a living saint. She takes these two boys into her home and heart. Until that is, Brian almost kills Deborah.
Not for the last time.
Meanwhile Dexter is planning to take out Captain Spencer. The only problem is that, through a series of rather heartwarming events, he’s given blood twice on the same day. So when it comes time for the kill he isn’t at his best.
Even so, Dex almost makes the kill. The only problem is that Nicky is still alive. And Dexter, proving again that he is a strange and gentle monster, cares more about saving the son than killing the father.
What worked
I first want to shine some well-deserved light on the casting in this series one last time. Because Roby Attal, who played Brian, did a fantastic job. He looks very much like Christian Camargo, who played Brian in the original series. But of course, the important thing is the facial and body language. He smiles like Brian, moves like Brian. And, of course, kills like Brian. He was the perfect choice.
I also really enjoyed the scenes between Dexter and Captain Spencer. They were well done and emotional. I loved the passion and anger in Dexter’s voice when he confronted Spencer. I loved Dex playing a video game and putting in Nicky’s initials. And I really loved Dex stabbing Spencer with a hypodermic needle through his hand and into his neck. It was well-written, well acted and cathartic.
Now, in the interest of fairness, I owe Sarah Michelle Gellar an apology. Because she was great in this episode. Her character, Tanya, was passionate and perfectly well-acted. Best of all, she looked her age.
And she looked beautiful.
So often in media women’s ages are hidden like dirty secrets. Even more so when she was popular in her youth. So to see her look her age, look haggard and tired, was fantastic.
What didn’t work
All of that being said, this was not a perfect episode. The worst thing, in my opinion, was that we found out why Captain Spencer abducted his son. Why he killed an innocent boy. Why he kidnapped these boys and tortured them for days before he killed them. And why he slaughtered an entire houseful of people.
I have no intention of spoiling the reveal for you. But when you watch it, I’m sure you’ll share in my disgust. I was expecting some deep dark secret, maybe some sort of corruption or betrayal.
But that’s not it. And the reason he had doesn’t make sense. Why torture these boys with his intention was, well, what it was?
I have some hope that this reveal was false. After all, all we have is the word of a man plastic wrapped to a table. I guess we’ll have to wait until the next episode to find out.
Finally, I do want to point out one thing that is a little disappointing about the series as a whole.
It’s kind of hard for there to be a lot of suspense for the coming episode. We already know that nothing very bad can happen to our dear demented Dexter. He will not be caught. He will not go to jail. He will not die. Neither will Deb, Brian, or any of the other beloved characters from the original series. So much of the tension we might have felt just isn’t there. This is a struggle for a prequel series and one that I don’t think this series has done enough to address.
Despite the slight letdown of the killer’s motivation, this was a good episode. It set up the finale with a great cliffhanger and left us with more questions than answers. I’m cautiously optimistic about the last episode of Dexter Original Sin.
(4 / 5)
Good news to my nonbinary pals – we no longer exist!
“But Brannyk,” you may be thinking, “what am I supposed to do now that I am no longer a real being? How shall I spend my days?”
Unfortunately, the government has not released a handbook for this occasion, so I thought we could brainstorm together.
BECOME A GHOST
There are some benefits to being a ghost, for sure.
No rent or insurance payment. No corporate job, no cleaning cat litter, no AT&T trying to sell you another line after repeatedly telling them that you just want to make sure that your autopayment is on, but they’re all like, ‘Why would you pass up such a bargain on a second line? Are you an idiot? Why wouldn’t you need another phone line?‘ and so you have to tell them, “Because I’M DIVORCED, ASSHOLE, THANKS FOR REMINDING ME OF THAT!”
Ahem. I digress.
Yeah, you may not be able to venture out, much like Adam and Barbara in Beetlejuice. You may need to put up with someone else crashing your place and moving around all of your shit. Or Ryan Reynolds trying to sell you Mint Mobile. Or some toxic couple taking your creepy doll that you spent years on trying to possess.
Or, my absolute biggest pet peeve, when you’re practicing for the ghost speed chair-stacking championship and the normies just don’t appreciate your cool skills.
But the advantages are that you get to stay home, watch tv, stack your chairs and hope whoever buys your house/visits your creepy woods/gentrifies your neighborhood is a cool person, too.
(2 / 5)
It’s a good choice, but has a lot of drawbacks.
BECOME A CREATURE
Look, if you’re not going to exist, go big or go home, I’d say.
Monsters are cool. They play by their own rules. Sometimes they cause havoc. Sometimes they come around and help people. Sometimes they work alone. And other times, they have a lot of friends. Sometimes they just need some affirmation. And sometimes they’re…in high school, apparently?
The cool thing is that they come in all shapes and sizes.
Monsters are generally misunderstood. Some have their fans. Others are hated.
So basically, just like people, except with more tentacles.
The only downsides are that you might be too big or too “ick” for some people (these can also be pluses), you may have a taste for human flesh (no judgement), or the biggest issue – there are too many choices.
You could get stuck trying to figure out what kind of monster you are. If you’re not into labels, it’s an absolute nightmare. Or if you’re like me, it’ll be like standing in Subway for 15 minutes trying to figure out what toppings and dressings you want while the “sandwich artist” is openly judging you.
(4 / 5)
I like the customization, but it can be a bit too overwhelming.
BECOME A CRYPTID
Hear me out. I know it seems a lot like the monster category, but it’s not quite.
Cryptids are weird and mysterious. They keep to themselves. They have people who are fascinated by them and post on Reddit about them. Some have people making documentaries about them.
They’re like monsters’ quieter cousin who reads books in the corner at family gatherings. They collect shiny things they find by the side of the road. Sometimes they’ll steal a peanut butter sandwich or two.
Ever so often, they might scare a human just by existing or by politely asking for their stuff back.
Each one kinda has their own goals and priorities. Their own hangouts and interests. But unlike monsters, they’re not looking to rock any boats-
Never mind, I stand corrected.
(5 / 5)
I like the freedoms of being a cryptid and also dig the cottage-core vibe I get from them.
CONCLUSION: LET’S BE REAL FOR A SECOND…
I know it’s hard right now. It’s going to be hard. You may not exist to some assholes, but you are real. You have real feelings and thoughts and dreams. You have a real future. You have real decisions. Real actions that affect this world.
You have the real ability to wake up tomorrow and choose to exist. And for whatever reason you choose. Use it. Ghosts and monsters and cryptids are powerful, just like you are, even when you don’t feel like it. They have a place in our human world, just like you do. You make this world interesting and important.
You are part of this world, you are real, and you are not alone.
The horror community is one of acceptance, diversity, creativity and passion. In these times, it needs to be. We need to rely on each other. We need to cultivate and protect each other, as much as we need to protect ourselves.
And it looks like I’ll be coming out of my own cryptid hovel I’ve spent the past few years in to remind you that. My job isn’t done. Not by a longshot. And neither is yours.
You exist to me. Today, tomorrow, and forever.
Be safe out there, friends.
Breaking News
Joe Bob’s Christmas Carnage: A Bloody Good Holiday Special Fri. December 13th – 9pm ET!
🎅🏼🔪 Brace yourselves for a blood-soaked holiday extravaganza! 🎄💀
Joe Bob’s Christmas Carnage is coming to town, and it’s not for the faint of heart! Catch this killer special on Shudder and AMC+ TV feeds Friday, December 13th at 9pm ET/8c, or stream it on-demand starting December 15th.
What’s in Santa’s bag of horrors? 🎁
Two spine-chilling holiday horror flicks
So much gore, even Rudolph’s nose will turn pale
A charity auction that’ll make your wallet scream (in a good way!)
Joe Bob and Darcy are decking the halls with boughs of terror, auctioning off:
- Rare AF props from The Last Drive-In
- Exclusive merch that’ll make your horror-loving heart skip a beat
- Joe Bob’s personal keepsakes from his 35-year reign of terror in the industry
But wait, there’s more…
Join the HauntedMTL crew for a spine-tingling side quest on Threads (https://www.threads.net/@_hauntedmtl_)! We’re going live as our very own Jim Phoenix breaks the bank for charity, adding an extra layer of terror to your Joe Bob experience. It’s like getting two scoops of horror in your bloody sundae! 🍦💀
Those britches are mine, bitches! -Jim circa the year of Darcy’s panties.
And because we love our fellow fiends, we’re stuffing your stockings with some killer swag! That’s right, HauntedMTL followers have a chance to win some seriously spooky goodies. It’s our way of saying “thanks for being part of our nightmare before Christmas!” 🎁👻
So, while Joe Bob and Darcy are slashing through their winter wonderland, hop over to Threads and join the HauntedMTL fam. It’s a horror-day party you won’t want to miss! Remember: the more you engage, the better your chances of scoring some haunted swag. Let’s make this a Christmas to dismember! 🔪🎄
Wanna know which flicks we’re slashing through? Tune in December 13th on Shudder to find out! 🍿🔪
Your holiday shopping spree will support these awesome causes:
Pacific Marine Mammal Center
Children of Fallen Patriots Foundation
Breast Cancer Research Foundation
Don’t be a Grinch – join the carnage and spread some bloody good cheer! 🎅🏼🔪🎄