Good news for all you aspiring Willards and Willardinas out there. 2020 has hit again in a strange, unforeseen way, according to an article in the Detroit Free Press, we’re going to be seeing more mice and rats in our homes.
Since little critters love eating our leftovers from behind the dumpsters of every mom-and-pop’s, Chili’s, and Chipotle (but not you, Del Taco…not you…), there’s a problem with people eating less at restaurants – there’s less food for these little dudes to enjoy in the “wild”. So, when they can’t eat in our suburban wastelands, where do you think they’ll migrate to?
Now, now, before you spout out the “not in my backyard dumpster”, let’s take a look at this again. Rats are pretty smart and resourceful. They don’t need much in the way of food. They’re hardy AF. They’re kind of perfect minions. There’s a reason why they have a better theme song than E.T. (I mean, besides Neil Diamond).
Honestly, there’s quite a few rats in horror, pop culture, and our history, so let’s talk about them a little. (Yes, I did go off on a rat rant during one of our podcasts, so what, come fight me)
Most recently while I was watching The Nutcracker (with the trying-his-best-but-completely-bored Macaulay Culkin as lead), the rats (although also referred to as mice) play quite the villainous role, especially the Rat/Mouse King. In the 1993 version, he’s a rat with multiple heads. In fact many versions call upon the “rat king” phenomenon as inspiration for this character/creature design, which…I mean, just look at him.
Oof…sweet dreams, children
Then of course, there’s the wildly under-appreciated Ratigan (voiced by horror icon Vincent Price) in the equally under-appreciated Disney film, The Great Mouse Detective.
Hmm…looks familiarAh yes…
And that’s not the only Disney movie to put a rat as the villain. Lady and the Tramp had a pretty alarming scene with the rat trying to…I guess eat the baby? But seriously, it’s a tense action scene that ends with the baby thrown to the floor and the Tramp injured.
Even the R.O.U.S. of The Princess Bride look like a cross between a rat and a beaver (but more rat due to the snout and the tail). And no, that totally didn’t freak me out with its jump-scare, hahahaha, you fool…So stupid.
Just here for aggressive cuddles
Or if you want to get more philosophical and bookish, there’s of course the overwhelming fear of rats from the main protagonist, Winston, from George Orwell’s, 1984. This is used effectively by the fascist government to get him to betray his love and fellow revolutionary, Julia. Spoilers for a book older than most of my readers.
Jigsaw’s earlier, cost-effective days
Rats in Horror
Apart from the cuddle-fests of Willard and Ben…
(pictured: a fully-clothed Ernest Borgnine getting ready for cuddles)
We have:
1976: Burt I. Gordon’s The Food of the Gods (based on an H.G. Wells novel) is more like The Stuff, but for animals. While there are other animals that grow and get…cranky, you can see from even the poster it’s the rats that take center stage.
1982: James Herbert’s Deadly Eyes which takes place in Toronto with large, ‘roided rats (yes, this is the one where dachshunds are dressed as rats; yes, it’s adorable).
1983: George P. Cosmatos’s Of Unknown Origin is another Canadian venture, but is really more about the frailty of the human condition than of the rat. But, yeah, rat…
1984: Bruno Matteo’s Rats: Night of Terror is set in the distant future of…2015, where the nuclear fallout has pushed survivors to fight genetically enhanced rats for food (great twist at the end).
1989: Damian Lee’s loose sequel, The Food of the Gods II, is about a literal man-child and big killer rats.
1990: Robert Rodriguez’s From Dusk to Dawn (yes, yes, written and starring Tarintino) has a LOT going on – criminals, strip clubs, vampires, the hottest Salma Hayek ever, crisis of faith, Tom Savini as a biker named Sex Machine, and…a rat creature (who happens to be Tom Savini/Sex Machine). This movie is bonkers ball-to-the-walls insanity, but the effects are, of course, outstanding and this rat is ugly AF.
2001: Miles Feldman’s Altered Species (aka….uhg, Rodentz) borrows from the “rats as science experiment gone wrong” trope, but this time we’re trying to cure cancer. Like in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the “experiment goo” contaminates some rats, giving them strength and power. Unlike TMNT, there are sadly no quips about pizza, nor any ninja arts from said rats.
2002: John Lafia’s The Rats, a made-for-tv movie, is about New Yorker rats (“Hey, I’m gnawin’ here!) that are, again, failed genetic experiments.
2003: Tibor Takács’s (non-made-for-tv-Christmas-movie) Killer Rats is another experimental rat story but with a possibly supernatural bend as they begin to have telepathic bonds.
Thoughts:
So, the years of the rat look like they’ve trickled out in the early 2000’s, but I think with this rise, maybe we’ll get some more flashes of inspiration in the future. Since horror is reflective to what our society fears in the moment, if this becomes a larger issue, then we probably will be seeing more of rats on the screen.
But hopefully as a Willard reboot-type situation (plus new and improved with telepathy!).
When not ravaging through the wilds of Detroit with Jellybeans the Cat, J.M. Brannyk (a.k.a. Boxhuman) reviews mostly supernatural and slasher films from the 70's-90's and is dubiously HauntedMTL's Voice of Reason.
Aside from writing, Brannyk dips into the podcasts, and is the composer of many of HauntedMTL's podcast themes.
It’s not horror, but I’ve always loved the animated movie by Don Bluth Studios, The Secret of NIMH. Rats are both good and bad, aiding the main hero, an unsuspecting mouse named Mrs. Frisby, on her journey to find her own inner strength and save her child.
“But Brannyk,” you may be thinking, “what am I supposed to do now that I am no longer a real being? How shall I spend my days?”
Unfortunately, the government has not released a handbook for this occasion, so I thought we could brainstorm together.
I’m sure it’s lost in the mail…
BECOME A GHOST
There are some benefits to being a ghost, for sure.
No rent or insurance payment. No corporate job, no cleaning cat litter, no AT&T trying to sell you another line after repeatedly telling them that you just want to make sure that your autopayment is on, but they’re all like, ‘Why would you pass up such a bargain on a second line? Are you an idiot?Why wouldn’t you need another phone line?‘ and so you have to tell them, “Because I’M DIVORCED, ASSHOLE, THANKS FOR REMINDING ME OF THAT!”
Or, my absolute biggest pet peeve, when you’re practicing for the ghost speed chair-stacking championship and the normies just don’t appreciate your cool skills.
The cool thing is that they come in all shapes and sizes.
Look at that face and tell me they’re not having the time of their lifeThese are literally just rock monstersYou can be…whatever the fuck they are….No. I’m not making the joke.
Monsters are generally misunderstood. Some have their fans. Others are hated.
So basically, just like people, except with more tentacles.
The only downsides are that you might be too big or too “ick” for some people (these can also be pluses), you may have a taste for human flesh (no judgement), or the biggest issue – there are too many choices.
You could get stuck trying to figure out what kind of monster you are. If you’re not into labels, it’s an absolute nightmare. Or if you’re like me, it’ll be like standing in Subway for 15 minutes trying to figure out what toppings and dressings you want while the “sandwich artist” is openly judging you.
(4 / 5)
I like the customization, but it can be a bit too overwhelming.
BECOME A CRYPTID
Hear me out. I know it seems a lot like the monster category, but it’s not quite.
Cryptids are weird and mysterious. They keep to themselves. They have people who are fascinated by them and post on Reddit about them. Some have people making documentaries about them.
They’re like monsters’ quieter cousin who reads books in the corner at family gatherings. They collect shiny things they find by the side of the road. Sometimes they’ll steal a peanut butter sandwich or two.
Each one kinda has their own goals and priorities. Their own hangouts and interests. But unlike monsters, they’re not looking to rock any boats-
oh, uh…
Never mind, I stand corrected.
(5 / 5)
I like the freedoms of being a cryptid and also dig the cottage-core vibe I get from them.
CONCLUSION: LET’S BE REAL FOR A SECOND…
I know it’s hard right now. It’s going to be hard. You may not exist to some assholes, but you are real. You have real feelings and thoughts and dreams. You have a real future. You have real decisions. Real actions that affect this world.
You have the real ability to wake up tomorrow and choose to exist. And for whatever reason you choose. Use it. Ghosts and monsters and cryptids are powerful, just like you are, even when you don’t feel like it. They have a place in our human world, just like you do. You make this world interesting and important.
You are part of this world, you are real, and you are not alone.
The horror community is one of acceptance, diversity, creativity and passion. In these times, it needs to be. We need to rely on each other. We need to cultivate and protect each other, as much as we need to protect ourselves.
And it looks like I’ll be coming out of my own cryptid hovel I’ve spent the past few years in to remind you that. My job isn’t done. Not by a longshot. And neither is yours.
🎅🏼🔪 Brace yourselves for a blood-soaked holiday extravaganza! 🎄💀
Joe Bob’s Christmas Carnage is coming to town, and it’s not for the faint of heart! Catch this killer special on Shudder and AMC+ TV feeds Friday, December 13th at 9pm ET/8c, or stream it on-demand starting December 15th.
What’s in Santa’s bag of horrors? 🎁
Two spine-chilling holiday horror flicks
So much gore, even Rudolph’s nose will turn pale
A charity auction that’ll make your wallet scream (in a good way!)
Joe Bob and Darcy are decking the halls with boughs of terror, auctioning off:
Rare AF props from The Last Drive-In
Exclusive merch that’ll make your horror-loving heart skip a beat
Joe Bob’s personal keepsakes from his 35-year reign of terror in the industry
But wait, there’s more…
Join the HauntedMTL crew for a spine-tingling side quest on Threads (https://www.threads.net/@_hauntedmtl_)! We’re going live as our very own Jim Phoenix breaks the bank for charity, adding an extra layer of terror to your Joe Bob experience. It’s like getting two scoops of horror in your bloody sundae! 🍦💀
Those britches are mine, bitches! -Jim circa the year of Darcy’s panties.
And because we love our fellow fiends, we’re stuffing your stockings with some killer swag! That’s right, HauntedMTL followers have a chance to win some seriously spooky goodies. It’s our way of saying “thanks for being part of our nightmare before Christmas!” 🎁👻
So, while Joe Bob and Darcy are slashing through their winter wonderland, hop over to Threads and join the HauntedMTL fam. It’s a horror-day party you won’t want to miss! Remember: the more you engage, the better your chances of scoring some haunted swag. Let’s make this a Christmas to dismember! 🔪🎄
Wanna know which flicks we’re slashing through? Tune in December 13th on Shudder to find out! 🍿🔪
Hey there, fright fiends! 👻 Are you ready to sink your fangs into some spine-tingling Black Friday deals? We’ve scoured the darkest corners of Amazon to bring you a blood-curdling collection of horror goodies that’ll make your wallet scream with joy! From classic monsters to modern nightmares, we’ve got something to haunt every horror fan’s dreams. Let’s dive into the madness!
Before we go further – we are an amazon affiliate and if you click these links we may get money for Amazon. With that said, we won’t put up things we don’t suggest so here is the curated list as it sits for Black Friday Week 2024.
Sink your teeth into Francis Ford Coppola’s visually stunning adaptation of the classic vampire tale. Watch Gary Oldman’s mesmerizing performance as the Count in glorious 4K resolution!
Rev up your engines for John Carpenter’s killer car classic! This 4K edition will have you gripping your steering wheel in terror as the demonic Plymouth Fury wreaks havoc.
Experience the mind-bending anime masterpiece that redefined the genre. Prepare for a psychedelic journey through Neo-Tokyo that’ll leave you questioning reality!
Dive into the eternal war between vampires and lycans with this action-packed collection. Kate Beckinsale’s leather-clad Selene will have you howling for more!
Okay, it’s not strictly horror, but who can resist the Weeping Angels? Join the Tenth Doctor on his time-traveling adventures and prepare for some serious sci-fi scares!
The slasher franchise that knows the rules is back with a vengeance! This meta-horror masterpiece will have you guessing who’s behind the Ghostface mask.
Who can resist the allure of a magical and/or haunted castle? Build your own magical world and watch out for those Dementors!
🎬 The Final Cut
There you have it, horror hounds! These Black Friday deals are so good, it’s scary. Whether you’re into classic monsters, modern slashers, or cosmic horrors, Amazon’s got something to make your dark heart skip a beat.
But hurry! Like a vampire at sunrise, these deals won’t last forever. If you want to do a general search on your own, feel free to use our link here.
Remember, in the world of horror, the only thing scarier than missing out on these deals is paying full price! Happy haunting, and may your Black Friday be filled with delightful frights! 🎃👻🔪
Jennifer Weigel
December 4, 2020 at 7:43 pm
It’s not horror, but I’ve always loved the animated movie by Don Bluth Studios, The Secret of NIMH. Rats are both good and bad, aiding the main hero, an unsuspecting mouse named Mrs. Frisby, on her journey to find her own inner strength and save her child.
Audrey III
December 4, 2020 at 10:15 pm
I’m calling you out, Brannyk! First for making you watch most of these rat movies and you never stopped me. Second for posting a picture of a gerbil.
J.M. Brannyk
December 14, 2020 at 10:29 pm
It’s a hybrid – a gat, or rerbil, if you will…