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Welcome back. Last week I took some time to outline the first episode of a Friday the 13th reboot miniseries. The whole thing sprung up after re-watching the series and deciding that I wanted to develop a story that felt more cohesive.

Where we last left off, we discovered that there have been yearly murders in a county around the Crystal Lake area for a couple of decades. With the attempt to re-open Camp Crystal Lake as a sort of upper-class escape for kids, Pamela Voorhees, mother of a child who went missing at the camp back in the 1980s, has been protesting the decision to reopen the campgrounds.

Also, she used black magic to bring her son back to life, who she has had chained up in a basement for twenty years, what with him coming back “wrong” and all.

Chapter Two: The Woman in the Woods

We begin with a cold open in the 1990s. Pamela is enjoying herself in a bar and decides to take a handsome stranger home to her cabin in the woods. She is in the middle of loving him in a biblical sense when he is alarmed by sounds below the floor. He asks if she has a kid. She tells him to ignore it and they get back to lovemaking. Suddenly, an enraged teenage Jason bursts into the room and rips the man from Pamela and beats him to death. Jason shudders on the floor, almost orgasmic, with his fists caked in blood. Pamela scolds him but then goes to comfort her son. We do not see his face yet.

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“It’s okay,” she tells him, “nothing will come between us.”

Back in the present, Alice has gone to the Sheriff’s office to ask about the incident at the camp back in the 1980s. Sheriff Savini tells her to stop stirring up trouble but reluctantly grants her access when she mentions seeing that Ms. Voorhees was in the camp records back then. He’s had trouble with her for years, now.

Meanwhile, the final day of preparation is at an end at the camp. The counselors are having a barbecue but it is interrupted by an aggravated Pamela Voorhees. She has come to the camp with a machete and begins hacking away at buildings, ropes, and tries to slice open the canoes. She demands the camp be closed. Several counselors try to restrain her and she manages to slice one of them deeply along the arm.

They finally manage to pin her down, but in a moment of distraction she kicks one of the counselors in the groin and darts off into the woods, leaving behind her machete.

Alice and Sheriff Savini are combing through records as Alice suggests that Pamela might have more information on the 1980s massacre. They are interrupted by a deputy who informs them that crazy ol’ Pamela was at the camp and sliced up a kid while trying to wreck the place. Sheriff Savini tells his deputy, Deputy Cunningham, to do a welfare check on Ms. Voorhees at her cabin. Cunningham, clearly concerned, asks if he can have some backup. Savini sends Deputy Hodder along as well. They bring tasers in case she proves to be too much of a handful.

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Alice suggests she and Savini head to the camp to retrace the path of destruction within the camp in the 1980s. Specifically, she wants to see if anything might have been overlooked. Savini agrees, albeit reluctantly, as he needs to head to the camp anyway to take statements about the most recent incident.

Cunningham and Hodder pull off the side of the road and step out as the drive up to the Voorhees cabin has not been kept up. The two discuss stories they’ve heard about the reclusive woman. When they finally arrive at the cabin they notice the door is open. They are being watched. They attempt to establish contact with her but fearing the worst and having probable cause, they enter.

Inside they see the place reflects Pamela’s shattered mental state. Everything is dirty and foul, with the exception of a small child’s bedroom, which has been kept immaculately clean. Caught off guard, a massive figure grabs Hodder and smashes his face against the stone fireplace. Cunningham tasers the giant man, who falls to his knees and looks up at him, roaring. We see Jason’s deformed face. Jason begins to rise, shaking off the taser, but Cunningham pulls his gun and shoots Jason in the knee, bringing him down again.

Cunningham steadies his aim to kill Jason when he is bashed in the back of the head by a rock. He falls to the ground, twitching, as Pamela stands over him. She scolds Jason for getting loose as he whimpers. She comforts him again, just as she did in the flashback, and dips her fingers into the pool of blood pooling around Cunningham’s head.

She takes her bloodied fingers and rubs the bullet wound in Jason’s leg. He whimpers, again, very childlike, and we see the wound begin to bubble and heal, albeit in the form ghastly pustules and tumors. She leads her boy back down to the basement and chains him up again.

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Having taken statements and it being so late, Savini suggests the survey of the area can wait until after he checks on Ms. Voorhees. Alice, annoyed, has no choice but to agree and instead retires to the faculty bunks to do some studying of the records again.

On her way back she runs across Mr. Eddie Jarvis who is wishing his son, Tommy, off. Tommy won’t be staying at the camp. He’ll be heading home with his mom, Trish. Eddie is the head counselor and asks Alice if she’s excited to see the kids tomorrow. She wonders if the camp will be safe, especially given what happened earlier that evening. Eddie reassures her that Camp Crystal Lake is entirely safe.

We return to Pamela’s cabin. In a frenzy of activity, she begins gathering weapons. In the basement, Jason darts his head back and forth as he hears his mother scuffing the floor above him. We cut back to Pamela tripping over Hodder’s body and kicking it in anger. Blood pooled below the officer falls between the cracks in the floorboards and splashes on the dusty floor in front of Jason. He wipes up the dust and blood with his muscular fingers and brings it to his lips.

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David Davis is a writer, cartoonist, and educator in Southern California with an M.A. in literature and writing studies.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Exx Vxx

    April 21, 2020 at 2:15 pm

    It really ramps up in the 2nd episode. Did you name the sheriff’s in the firs episode? Or am I just noticing their names now? lol I love the visuals in this.

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Breaking News

Joe Bob’s Christmas Carnage: A Bloody Good Holiday Special Fri. December 13th – 9pm ET!

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🎅🏼🔪 Brace yourselves for a blood-soaked holiday extravaganza! 🎄💀

Joe Bob’s Christmas Carnage is coming to town, and it’s not for the faint of heart! Catch this killer special on Shudder and AMC+ TV feeds Friday, December 13th at 9pm ET/8c, or stream it on-demand starting December 15th.

What’s in Santa’s bag of horrors? 🎁

Two spine-chilling holiday horror flicks

So much gore, even Rudolph’s nose will turn pale

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A charity auction that’ll make your wallet scream (in a good way!)

Joe Bob and Darcy are decking the halls with boughs of terror, auctioning off:

  • Rare AF props from The Last Drive-In
  • Exclusive merch that’ll make your horror-loving heart skip a beat
  • Joe Bob’s personal keepsakes from his 35-year reign of terror in the industry

But wait, there’s more…

Join the HauntedMTL crew for a spine-tingling side quest on Threads (https://www.threads.net/@_hauntedmtl_)! We’re going live as our very own Jim Phoenix breaks the bank for charity, adding an extra layer of terror to your Joe Bob experience. It’s like getting two scoops of horror in your bloody sundae! 🍦💀

Those britches are mine, bitches! -Jim circa the year of Darcy’s panties.

And because we love our fellow fiends, we’re stuffing your stockings with some killer swag! That’s right, HauntedMTL followers have a chance to win some seriously spooky goodies. It’s our way of saying “thanks for being part of our nightmare before Christmas!” 🎁👻

So, while Joe Bob and Darcy are slashing through their winter wonderland, hop over to Threads and join the HauntedMTL fam. It’s a horror-day party you won’t want to miss! Remember: the more you engage, the better your chances of scoring some haunted swag. Let’s make this a Christmas to dismember! 🔪🎄

Wanna know which flicks we’re slashing through? Tune in December 13th on Shudder to find out! 🍿🔪

Your holiday shopping spree will support these awesome causes:
Pacific Marine Mammal Center

Children of Fallen Patriots Foundation

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Family Promise

Breast Cancer Research Foundation

Don’t be a Grinch – join the carnage and spread some bloody good cheer! 🎅🏼🔪🎄

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Breaking News

🎃 Unleash the Terror: Epic Black Friday 2024 Deals for Horror Fans on Amazon! 🧟‍♂️

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Hey there, fright fiends! 👻 Are you ready to sink your fangs into some spine-tingling Black Friday deals? We’ve scoured the darkest corners of Amazon to bring you a blood-curdling collection of horror goodies that’ll make your wallet scream with joy! From classic monsters to modern nightmares, we’ve got something to haunt every horror fan’s dreams. Let’s dive into the madness!

Before we go further – we are an amazon affiliate and if you click these links we may get money for Amazon. With that said, we won’t put up things we don’t suggest so here is the curated list as it sits for Black Friday Week 2024.

🎥 Monstrous Movie Mayhem

Bram Stoker’s Dracula 4K

Sink your teeth into Francis Ford Coppola’s visually stunning adaptation of the classic vampire tale. Watch Gary Oldman’s mesmerizing performance as the Count in glorious 4K resolution!

Christine 4K

Rev up your engines for John Carpenter’s killer car classic! This 4K edition will have you gripping your steering wheel in terror as the demonic Plymouth Fury wreaks havoc.

Akira Blu-ray

Experience the mind-bending anime masterpiece that redefined the genre. Prepare for a psychedelic journey through Neo-Tokyo that’ll leave you questioning reality!

Underworld Ultimate Collection Blu-ray

Dive into the eternal war between vampires and lycans with this action-packed collection. Kate Beckinsale’s leather-clad Selene will have you howling for more!

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Resident Evil Steelbook

For the true RE fanatics, this gorgeous steelbook edition is a must-have for your collection. It’s so shiny, you can see the T-virus reflected in it!

Doctor Who Complete David Tennant Blu-ray

Okay, it’s not strictly horror, but who can resist the Weeping Angels? Join the Tenth Doctor on his time-traveling adventures and prepare for some serious sci-fi scares!

Evil Dead Blu-ray

Groovy, baby! Sam Raimi’s cult classic will have you laughing and screaming in equal measure. Remember, this is your boom stick!

Scream (2022) Steelbook

The slasher franchise that knows the rules is back with a vengeance! This meta-horror masterpiece will have you guessing who’s behind the Ghostface mask.

Leviathan 4K UHD Blu-ray

Dive deep into aquatic terror with this underrated gem from the golden age of practical effects. It’s like “The Thing” meets “The Abyss”!

📚 Bone-Chilling Books and Comics

Terrifier 2 BOOK by Tim Waggoner

Can’t get enough of Art the Clown? This novelization of the splatter sensation will paint vivid, gory pictures in your mind. Sleep tight!

The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror Ominous Omnibus Vol. 3

D’oh-n’t miss out on this collection of spooky Simpsons stories! It’s the perfect way to celebrate Halloween in Springfield all year round.

The Dead Zone by Stephen King

Dive into one of King’s classic tales of psychic abilities and political intrigue. Johnny Smith’s visions will keep you on the edge of your seat!

🎮 Ghoulish Games and Collectibles

Halloween and Ash vs Evil Dead PS5

Double the horror, double the fun! Face off against Michael Myers and the Deadites in this terrifying two-pack of asymmetrical multiplayer games.

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Alone in the Dark Xbox Series X

Return to Derceto Manor in this reimagining of the survival horror classic. Just remember, in the dark, you’re never truly alone…

Chucky Funko Pop

Add everyone’s favorite Good Guy doll to your collection! Just don’t turn your back on him, or you might regret it…

Harry Potter LEGO Hogwarts

Who can resist the allure of a magical and/or haunted castle? Build your own magical world and watch out for those Dementors!

🎬 The Final Cut

There you have it, horror hounds! These Black Friday deals are so good, it’s scary. Whether you’re into classic monsters, modern slashers, or cosmic horrors, Amazon’s got something to make your dark heart skip a beat.

But hurry! Like a vampire at sunrise, these deals won’t last forever. If you want to do a general search on your own, feel free to use our link here.

Remember, in the world of horror, the only thing scarier than missing out on these deals is paying full price! Happy haunting, and may your Black Friday be filled with delightful frights! 🎃👻🔪

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Editorial

Rock the Vote for Real

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Star spangled costume identity portrait of myself - Rock the Vote
Star spangled costume identity portrait of myself

If you live in the United States, it’s time to rock the vote for real. I shared this video before in conjunction with my identity-based costume work, and I feel it’s important to revisit now, with the election coming up in just a few days. Besides which, Jack Black and Tenacious D are brilliant and given the current political climate, who doesn’t want to do the time warp? But seriously, get out and rock the vote, your life kinda does depend on it (at least insomuch as being able to make for yourself the life that you want, without the government telling you how to do so – especially if you live on the fringes of socially acceptable awkwardness like me and so many of my friends).

tenacious d rock-y the vote

Besides which, this video is so good, it’s worth sharing again anyway. And again, if for some reason the video doesn’t load, you can find it here.

Tow Away Zone photograph of sign and flag as found by Jennifer Weigel
Tow Away Zone photograph of sign and flag as found by Jennifer Weigel
Tow Away Zone photograph in flag form
Tow Away Zone photograph in flag form

Art Attack

And here are some artworks I made awhile back as political commentary. The photograph was shot of the scene exactly as found, of a sign above a parking lot in a quickly gentrifying neighborhood making sure all knew that any unauthorized vehicles were unwelcome, and hung right in front of a flag that was tattered and torn from being caught on the chain link fence driving the point home. The flags were meant to be interactive, with gallerygoers waving them while singing The Star Spangled Banner in its elitist entirety. The whole really spoke to me regarding some of the political climate at the time (this was right before Trump was elected President the first time). How much has changed since then? In some ways, a lot. In other ways, I guess we shall see.

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