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Welcome back. Last week I took some time to outline the first episode of a Friday the 13th reboot miniseries. The whole thing sprung up after re-watching the series and deciding that I wanted to develop a story that felt more cohesive.

Where we last left off, we discovered that there have been yearly murders in a county around the Crystal Lake area for a couple of decades. With the attempt to re-open Camp Crystal Lake as a sort of upper-class escape for kids, Pamela Voorhees, mother of a child who went missing at the camp back in the 1980s, has been protesting the decision to reopen the campgrounds.

Also, she used black magic to bring her son back to life, who she has had chained up in a basement for twenty years, what with him coming back “wrong” and all.

Chapter Two: The Woman in the Woods

We begin with a cold open in the 1990s. Pamela is enjoying herself in a bar and decides to take a handsome stranger home to her cabin in the woods. She is in the middle of loving him in a biblical sense when he is alarmed by sounds below the floor. He asks if she has a kid. She tells him to ignore it and they get back to lovemaking. Suddenly, an enraged teenage Jason bursts into the room and rips the man from Pamela and beats him to death. Jason shudders on the floor, almost orgasmic, with his fists caked in blood. Pamela scolds him but then goes to comfort her son. We do not see his face yet.

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“It’s okay,” she tells him, “nothing will come between us.”

Back in the present, Alice has gone to the Sheriff’s office to ask about the incident at the camp back in the 1980s. Sheriff Savini tells her to stop stirring up trouble but reluctantly grants her access when she mentions seeing that Ms. Voorhees was in the camp records back then. He’s had trouble with her for years, now.

Meanwhile, the final day of preparation is at an end at the camp. The counselors are having a barbecue but it is interrupted by an aggravated Pamela Voorhees. She has come to the camp with a machete and begins hacking away at buildings, ropes, and tries to slice open the canoes. She demands the camp be closed. Several counselors try to restrain her and she manages to slice one of them deeply along the arm.

They finally manage to pin her down, but in a moment of distraction she kicks one of the counselors in the groin and darts off into the woods, leaving behind her machete.

Alice and Sheriff Savini are combing through records as Alice suggests that Pamela might have more information on the 1980s massacre. They are interrupted by a deputy who informs them that crazy ol’ Pamela was at the camp and sliced up a kid while trying to wreck the place. Sheriff Savini tells his deputy, Deputy Cunningham, to do a welfare check on Ms. Voorhees at her cabin. Cunningham, clearly concerned, asks if he can have some backup. Savini sends Deputy Hodder along as well. They bring tasers in case she proves to be too much of a handful.

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Alice suggests she and Savini head to the camp to retrace the path of destruction within the camp in the 1980s. Specifically, she wants to see if anything might have been overlooked. Savini agrees, albeit reluctantly, as he needs to head to the camp anyway to take statements about the most recent incident.

Cunningham and Hodder pull off the side of the road and step out as the drive up to the Voorhees cabin has not been kept up. The two discuss stories they’ve heard about the reclusive woman. When they finally arrive at the cabin they notice the door is open. They are being watched. They attempt to establish contact with her but fearing the worst and having probable cause, they enter.

Inside they see the place reflects Pamela’s shattered mental state. Everything is dirty and foul, with the exception of a small child’s bedroom, which has been kept immaculately clean. Caught off guard, a massive figure grabs Hodder and smashes his face against the stone fireplace. Cunningham tasers the giant man, who falls to his knees and looks up at him, roaring. We see Jason’s deformed face. Jason begins to rise, shaking off the taser, but Cunningham pulls his gun and shoots Jason in the knee, bringing him down again.

Cunningham steadies his aim to kill Jason when he is bashed in the back of the head by a rock. He falls to the ground, twitching, as Pamela stands over him. She scolds Jason for getting loose as he whimpers. She comforts him again, just as she did in the flashback, and dips her fingers into the pool of blood pooling around Cunningham’s head.

She takes her bloodied fingers and rubs the bullet wound in Jason’s leg. He whimpers, again, very childlike, and we see the wound begin to bubble and heal, albeit in the form ghastly pustules and tumors. She leads her boy back down to the basement and chains him up again.

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Having taken statements and it being so late, Savini suggests the survey of the area can wait until after he checks on Ms. Voorhees. Alice, annoyed, has no choice but to agree and instead retires to the faculty bunks to do some studying of the records again.

On her way back she runs across Mr. Eddie Jarvis who is wishing his son, Tommy, off. Tommy won’t be staying at the camp. He’ll be heading home with his mom, Trish. Eddie is the head counselor and asks Alice if she’s excited to see the kids tomorrow. She wonders if the camp will be safe, especially given what happened earlier that evening. Eddie reassures her that Camp Crystal Lake is entirely safe.

We return to Pamela’s cabin. In a frenzy of activity, she begins gathering weapons. In the basement, Jason darts his head back and forth as he hears his mother scuffing the floor above him. We cut back to Pamela tripping over Hodder’s body and kicking it in anger. Blood pooled below the officer falls between the cracks in the floorboards and splashes on the dusty floor in front of Jason. He wipes up the dust and blood with his muscular fingers and brings it to his lips.

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David Davis is a writer, cartoonist, and educator in Southern California with an M.A. in literature and writing studies.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Exx Vxx

    April 21, 2020 at 2:15 pm

    It really ramps up in the 2nd episode. Did you name the sheriff’s in the firs episode? Or am I just noticing their names now? lol I love the visuals in this.

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Breaking News

🎃 Unleash the Terror: Epic Black Friday 2024 Deals for Horror Fans on Amazon! 🧟‍♂️

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Hey there, fright fiends! 👻 Are you ready to sink your fangs into some spine-tingling Black Friday deals? We’ve scoured the darkest corners of Amazon to bring you a blood-curdling collection of horror goodies that’ll make your wallet scream with joy! From classic monsters to modern nightmares, we’ve got something to haunt every horror fan’s dreams. Let’s dive into the madness!

Before we go further – we are an amazon affiliate and if you click these links we may get money for Amazon. With that said, we won’t put up things we don’t suggest so here is the curated list as it sits for Black Friday Week 2024.

🎥 Monstrous Movie Mayhem

Bram Stoker’s Dracula 4K

Sink your teeth into Francis Ford Coppola’s visually stunning adaptation of the classic vampire tale. Watch Gary Oldman’s mesmerizing performance as the Count in glorious 4K resolution!

Christine 4K

Rev up your engines for John Carpenter’s killer car classic! This 4K edition will have you gripping your steering wheel in terror as the demonic Plymouth Fury wreaks havoc.

Akira Blu-ray

Experience the mind-bending anime masterpiece that redefined the genre. Prepare for a psychedelic journey through Neo-Tokyo that’ll leave you questioning reality!

Underworld Ultimate Collection Blu-ray

Dive into the eternal war between vampires and lycans with this action-packed collection. Kate Beckinsale’s leather-clad Selene will have you howling for more!

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Resident Evil Steelbook

For the true RE fanatics, this gorgeous steelbook edition is a must-have for your collection. It’s so shiny, you can see the T-virus reflected in it!

Doctor Who Complete David Tennant Blu-ray

Okay, it’s not strictly horror, but who can resist the Weeping Angels? Join the Tenth Doctor on his time-traveling adventures and prepare for some serious sci-fi scares!

Evil Dead Blu-ray

Groovy, baby! Sam Raimi’s cult classic will have you laughing and screaming in equal measure. Remember, this is your boom stick!

Scream (2022) Steelbook

The slasher franchise that knows the rules is back with a vengeance! This meta-horror masterpiece will have you guessing who’s behind the Ghostface mask.

Leviathan 4K UHD Blu-ray

Dive deep into aquatic terror with this underrated gem from the golden age of practical effects. It’s like “The Thing” meets “The Abyss”!

📚 Bone-Chilling Books and Comics

Terrifier 2 BOOK by Tim Waggoner

Can’t get enough of Art the Clown? This novelization of the splatter sensation will paint vivid, gory pictures in your mind. Sleep tight!

The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror Ominous Omnibus Vol. 3

D’oh-n’t miss out on this collection of spooky Simpsons stories! It’s the perfect way to celebrate Halloween in Springfield all year round.

The Dead Zone by Stephen King

Dive into one of King’s classic tales of psychic abilities and political intrigue. Johnny Smith’s visions will keep you on the edge of your seat!

🎮 Ghoulish Games and Collectibles

Halloween and Ash vs Evil Dead PS5

Double the horror, double the fun! Face off against Michael Myers and the Deadites in this terrifying two-pack of asymmetrical multiplayer games.

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Alone in the Dark Xbox Series X

Return to Derceto Manor in this reimagining of the survival horror classic. Just remember, in the dark, you’re never truly alone…

Chucky Funko Pop

Add everyone’s favorite Good Guy doll to your collection! Just don’t turn your back on him, or you might regret it…

Harry Potter LEGO Hogwarts

Who can resist the allure of a magical and/or haunted castle? Build your own magical world and watch out for those Dementors!

🎬 The Final Cut

There you have it, horror hounds! These Black Friday deals are so good, it’s scary. Whether you’re into classic monsters, modern slashers, or cosmic horrors, Amazon’s got something to make your dark heart skip a beat.

But hurry! Like a vampire at sunrise, these deals won’t last forever. If you want to do a general search on your own, feel free to use our link here.

Remember, in the world of horror, the only thing scarier than missing out on these deals is paying full price! Happy haunting, and may your Black Friday be filled with delightful frights! 🎃👻🔪

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Editorial

Rock the Vote for Real

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Star spangled costume identity portrait of myself - Rock the Vote
Star spangled costume identity portrait of myself

If you live in the United States, it’s time to rock the vote for real. I shared this video before in conjunction with my identity-based costume work, and I feel it’s important to revisit now, with the election coming up in just a few days. Besides which, Jack Black and Tenacious D are brilliant and given the current political climate, who doesn’t want to do the time warp? But seriously, get out and rock the vote, your life kinda does depend on it (at least insomuch as being able to make for yourself the life that you want, without the government telling you how to do so – especially if you live on the fringes of socially acceptable awkwardness like me and so many of my friends).

tenacious d rock-y the vote

Besides which, this video is so good, it’s worth sharing again anyway. And again, if for some reason the video doesn’t load, you can find it here.

Tow Away Zone photograph of sign and flag as found by Jennifer Weigel
Tow Away Zone photograph of sign and flag as found by Jennifer Weigel
Tow Away Zone photograph in flag form
Tow Away Zone photograph in flag form

Art Attack

And here are some artworks I made awhile back as political commentary. The photograph was shot of the scene exactly as found, of a sign above a parking lot in a quickly gentrifying neighborhood making sure all knew that any unauthorized vehicles were unwelcome, and hung right in front of a flag that was tattered and torn from being caught on the chain link fence driving the point home. The flags were meant to be interactive, with gallerygoers waving them while singing The Star Spangled Banner in its elitist entirety. The whole really spoke to me regarding some of the political climate at the time (this was right before Trump was elected President the first time). How much has changed since then? In some ways, a lot. In other ways, I guess we shall see.

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Breaking News

Joe Bob Briggs Creepy Christmas spooktacular: The Last Drive-In Special Charity phenomena

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Famed horror host, Pulitzer Prize nominated, and Cracker Barrel aficionado Joe Bob Briggs is back in action, ready to bring some macabre merriment to your holiday season with Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas. It also gives us horror fans something to take into the new year, be that something Darcy’s panties (sorry, box, I tried) or just the intangible good feels of hanging with friends and supporting a lot of good causes.

The Return of Joe Bob Briggs’s Christmas Special

The Joe Bob Briggs’s Christmas event is akin to a Jerry Lewis telethon for Gen X, with a twist of ‘the last drive-in with Joe Bob Briggs’. This ‘Briggs’ auction of sorts is a nostalgic nod to the past, especially for those who remember the telethons. The dread, however, has shifted from the … well… whatever Jerry was supposed to do (see Sam Kinison’s bit on this for more info) to that of evil goodies.

Without a doubt, this Joe Bob Briggs special is the event we eagerly anticipate each year. It’s a tradition, and a worthy one at that. We hope to see everyone on the interwebs, joining the ‘creepy links’ and engaging in the conversation (We’ll be on Threads and Twitter….tag us as you wish!) ‘live’ the only way anyone should ever watch a tv show (oh, and I guess on demand, but ya weirdos will never know the sting of the Iron Mutant Award!). ‘Live’ is the only way anyone should ever watch a TV show, especially ‘the last drive-in with Joe Bob Briggs’ (as it’s far too hard to watch tv whilst dead).

Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas The ‘Last Drive-In with Joe Bob Briggs and Darcy the Mail Girl’ special will hit the airwaves live on Shudder TV and AMC+ TV on Friday, December 15th at 9 p.m. ET. Fans of ‘the last drive-in with Joe Bob Briggs’ can also catch the special on-demand starting Sunday, December 17th.

A Creepy Christmas with a Cause

In its fourth year, the holiday tradition of The Last Drive-In goes beyond mere entertainment. It aims to use the platform to raise funds for four vital causes. The charity auction will feature unique props and exclusive merchandise from The Last Drive-In and memorabilia from Briggs’ illustrious 35-year career…including some of his unspoken work as John Bloom. I say Unspoken, because if anyone remembers the first Christmas Special, the autographed copy of Eccentric Orbits was featured (sincerely, a good book–check it out if you haven’t. Jim gives it 4.5/5)

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The supported charities for Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas will include:

The Mystery of the Joe Bob Briggs’s Creepy Christmas Special

The anticipation for Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas is high, with fans wildly speculating what films will be featured. Personally, nothing can beat the #1 top horror Christmas film of all time, the Easter classic: Passion of the Christ (if a snuff film about a guy who doesn’t fit in getting whipped and nailed up doesn’t scream horror story, I don’t know what does. Also: See Sam Kinison’s concept on crosses and resurrection). However, a Christmas movie I really want to see up on this is Hogzilla and Kiss Save Santa Clause! BOOMMM!! Christmas Won!

As we eagerly wait for December 15th, we wonder what surprises our favorite horror host, Joe Bob Briggs, has in store this time. Will there be exclusive ‘merch’ that Jim will buy and then accidentally put in a Toys for Tots box in the mall?

Join the Fun, Join the Cause, Join the Joe Bob Briggs Christmas event!

Are you ready to dive into the world of Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas? Do you dare to watch along and help raise money for a good cause? If so, join us at HauntedMTL on Threads (_HauntedMTL_) and maybe Twitter (@HauntedMTL) as we experience the thrill and chills that only Joe Bob Briggs and Darcy can deliver.

Remember, this is not just about indulging in some good old horror fun with ‘Joe Bob’s’ double feature. It’s about giving back and making a difference. So, let’s gear up to have a creepy Christmas with ‘Joe Bob Briggs’, filled with ‘christmas horror films’, ‘christmas demons’, ‘christmas slasher films’, ‘ho-ho-horror’, ‘yuletide horror’ and insightful ‘horror commentary’.Joe Bob’s Creepy Christmas and make this holiday season memorable for all the right reasons! I’m sure Fright Rags will have another stellar set this year, too. They are perfect for the horror fan in your life (even if that fan is you!). I can’t wait to see what they have in store (no pun).

SPECIAL — IF YOU WANT Freeeeeeeee (as supplies last) Fright Rags Joe Bob Briggs merch for this year, just tweet/thread at us during the event and Jim will pick the one that makes him chuckle the most (you will need to give us your address and size in DMs)

No subscription to watch Joe Bob Briggs’s Creepy Christmas yet? No problem! Check the link below:

AMC Networks’ Shudder is a premium streaming video service, super-serving members with the best selection in genre entertainment, covering horror, thrillers and the supernatural. Shudder’s expanding library of film, TV series, and originals is available on most streaming devices in the US, Canada, the UK, Ireland, Australia and New Zealand. For a 7-day, risk-free trial, visit Joe Bob at www.shudder.com.

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